Get an owl (probably best to get a toy version), write a letter from the Headmaster at Hogworts telling her the school board considered her application but they don’t admit squibs. Very sorry, yours truly, etc. Soak it in cold tea to give it that authentic scroll discolouration look. Tuck the letter under the owls wing and leave it outside her bedroom door one night.
Thought to start with she was a big Radiohead fan
Honestly same girl, same. But the battle of hogwarts happened the year after I was born so they’d have still been rebuilding 😅
Even worse if she was a squib
I think you done it for internet points
Tell her Hogwarts has been closed down due to failing standards by OFSTED.
Or the owl idea.
Mock up a BBC article about Hogwarts being fitted with that dodgy RAAC concrete, and needing to shut down for a year for renovations. Extend as needed
Thought this was posted on r/Radiohead for a second
Don’t! Get her a wand instead
I think just explain that due to punishing children by putting them in the forbidden forest, multiple student and faculty deaths, non completion of OWLS and NEWTS for years, the whole thing with hagrid etc, that Hogwarts has unfortunately been shut down by magical Ofsted. She could consider Beauxbatons but would need to be fluent in French.
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Get an owl (probably best to get a toy version), write a letter from the Headmaster at Hogworts telling her the school board considered her application but they don’t admit squibs. Very sorry, yours truly, etc. Soak it in cold tea to give it that authentic scroll discolouration look. Tuck the letter under the owls wing and leave it outside her bedroom door one night.
Thought to start with she was a big Radiohead fan
Honestly same girl, same. But the battle of hogwarts happened the year after I was born so they’d have still been rebuilding 😅
Even worse if she was a squib
I think you done it for internet points
Tell her Hogwarts has been closed down due to failing standards by OFSTED.
Or the owl idea.
Mock up a BBC article about Hogwarts being fitted with that dodgy RAAC concrete, and needing to shut down for a year for renovations. Extend as needed
Thought this was posted on r/Radiohead for a second
Don’t! Get her a wand instead
I think just explain that due to punishing children by putting them in the forbidden forest, multiple student and faculty deaths, non completion of OWLS and NEWTS for years, the whole thing with hagrid etc, that Hogwarts has unfortunately been shut down by magical Ofsted. She could consider Beauxbatons but would need to be fluent in French.