After twenty minutes dodging morning traffic on my bike and battling through a station full of people blocking the way, I found this on the table of my train. Immediate thought was "oh fuck off!" Too polite to bin it though, so moved it to another table where maybe it'll encounter someone less misanthropic…

by BorisYentob

27 comments

  1. I initially read it as “you are annoying” so I guess that says everything about my own mindset.

  3. I’d be fine with it until the ‘smile’ bit.
    I hate being told to smile even if I’m in a really good mood that pisses me off straight away.

  4. I’d be fine with it if it wasn’t for the underlining and seemingly random capitals.

  5. That just reads like ‘you should smile more’ with extra steps.

  6. Just add a few smiley faces for the complete experience

  9. Don’t worry, the note was probably for someone else.

  10. It is human right as a UK person to be ‘grumpy AF. If I like’

  13. Ugh, Jesus. That cunt practices holistic medicine, guaranteed.

  14. This is the most British response to that kind of note and I love it

  15. If any of you are thinking of giving me a note, I like the ones with the queen on thanks.

  16. Why does this anonymous person think I’m amazing. I’m not. I’m a cunt

  18. ‘Smile! it might never happen’ ….it just has being around a fuckwit

  19. “Misanthropic”?! ‘Ere everyone! Look, ‘e finks ‘e’s David Coppafield!

  20. This is why that survey that came out recently about the UK being the second-most miserable place in the world to live should be taken with a pinch of salt.

    We can still hate shite like this without all being depressed. It’s just our psyche

  21. Plot twist, they knew it would elicit this kind of response in someone and that’s exactly why they wrote it.

  22. Same energy as the M. Markle bananas for sex workers. She wrote in black Sharpie, actually on the skin of the bananas ” You are Strong “, ” You Are Brave “, ” You Are Loved ” etc. etc. 🤮
    Get tae fook ! 🤡

  23. Month 1 of me starting to work in London:

    Wow! This is amazing, I’m working in the big city! It’s a long ass commute, and I have to be up super early, but I can catch up on my programs/reading on the way in, and go shopping once I finish work and be back by 9 for a good amount of rest before the next day! I’m so excited! What a lovely note!

    Two years in:

    MOTHER FUCKER TAKE YOUR FEET OFF THE TABLE AND BAG OFF THE SEAT IVE BEEN TRAVELLING SINCE 4AM AND NEED TO TAKE A NAP….I’LL BE BACK BY 11PM FOR A WHOLE NEW DAY OF SOMETHING I CAN DO WORKING FROM HOM… OH FOR FUCK SAKE I GUESS I WONT BE ABLE TO EAT DINNER OR TAKE A NA….GOD DAMMIT STOP TELLING ME TO BE F-ING POSITIVE SOMEONE JUMPED IN FRONT OF THE TRAIN ON THE TUBE AND MANAGEMENT ARE SHIT I NEED TO SLEEP IM SO GOD DAMN TIRED IM GONNA RIP THIS NOTE TO SHREDS

    God damn I’m super excited for a local job that somehow pays more than my London gig.

  24. People don’t believe me when I tell them I regularly feel genuine happiness and contentment, but that’s because I’m the complete opposite of this.

    I feel like people who act like this are overcompensating… acting like this is the thin, plastic film covering the void while the void can be represented by the vast, darkness that is the Nutella under the film.

  25. Would much rather a dad joke or a dick doodle. Rather than a patronising disingenuous note by someone who trying to convince themselves they’re a good person collecting karma spreading they’re positive vibezz

  26. In a world where everyone is amazing, nobody is amazing.

  27. Fuck that, I don’t want simpering bollocks disease to spread further, straight in the bin it go’s (recycling bin obviously, i’m not that nasty)

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