What is the proper way to eat a jam doughnut? I say eat everything leaving a jam Haggis for the last mouthful

29 comments

1. Shove in gob

2. I like to bake it and eat it slowly

3. Eat from the hole inwards to avoid the risk of splooging as much as possible.

4. I utilise syringe to remove the jam and store it in mason jar for future usage, I feed the doughnut to the pigeons

5. I eat the jam bit first because I prefer the bit with no jam in.

6. Jam haggis? Only if it’s deep fried first.

7. I tear them in half to find out where the jam is, and then eat accordingly so that each mouthful gets the right ratio of jam. 

   I want one now. 

8. “Jam Haggis” is fantastic and I shall forever refer to it as such.

   Also, the proper way for me is to bite into it, taking an equal portion from the haggis as well as the dough. There needs to be dough and jam in every mouthful

9. I eat the doughnut then suck the jam off my t-shirt.

10. Single bite

11. I dribble jam all down my front, then proceed to end up in a massive sticky mess.

12. I strongly agree with your everything-leaving-a-jam-haggis-for-the-end proposal. Warming slightly is optional.

13. Sometimes I add a smear of peanut butter on top. Please don’t knock it until you have tried it.

14. Tongue in the hole while you maintain eye contact with the cashier

15. Pierce the centre with a metal straw and slurp out the jam leaving a hollow batter husk, all with the manic energy of Daniel day Lewis drinking that milkshake in the final scene of there will be blood.

16. Well for starters no. Always vanilla and add fresh cream. 🤤 These honestly taste amazing at 5am. Used to be a scratch baker and I was told it’s an untold secret that you can have as many of these bad boys as you want, well by 11am , I had eaten 20, the room was spinning from sugar rush 🤣

17. Seriously with no shirt or a bib So messy but so good.

18. Eat around it leaving the jam aka nectar of the gods to last. U don’t want to eat plain donut

19. Knife and fork

20. Locate jam entrance. Point towards mouth and massage contents into face. Tolerate the squashed sweet dough.

21. Only way is to microwave for 10-15 seconds so the jam is warm and the doughnut is soft but not scolding your mouth as you shove it into your gob with jam trickling down your chin.

22. ”
    eat everything leaving a jam Haggis for the last mouthful     
                                                                     ”

    Inshallah.

23. I want to save as much jam for the last bite as I can

    Think that the jam is probably closest to the hole

    Bite directly opposite the hole

    Realise that internal doughnut jam pressure nor gravity care for my attempts to save the jam and lose a large portion of it down my top

    Realise I need to commit to the side I’ve already started and adjust my grip so that further spurts of jam only go into my palm rather than down my shirt

    Eat the rest of the doughnut, losing more jam to my palm

    By the time I get to the last bite, it has roughly as much jam as every other bite

    Lick the jam off my fingers

    Suck the jam out of my shirt

    Not learn a single thing and repeat for the next doughnuts until the pack is empty (what? They go stale quickly)

24. Pretend it’s that lucky time

25. hold it normal for the first bite then flip it 90 degrees and eat whilst spinning

26. With your mouth I’d say

27. Never say the words “jam haggis” ever again.

28. Eat from the sphincter in.

29. r/brandnewsentence