The highest cause of death in men in the uk is suicide. Men are 3 times more likely to take their own life than women.
We don’t often see this being discussed.
>However, I’d caution the Scottish Government. Humza Yousaf now rightly speaks of “a vision for masculinity that is uplifting and positive so the negative male role models we are all aware of can be challenged”. I applaud this. However, the Government press machine still talks of “toxic masculinity”.
>That mixed messaging is self-defeating. You can present all the positive role models available, but keep telling boys they’re toxic, and they’ll switch off.
Bingo.
There is a reason we do not talk about ‘toxic femininity’ but ‘internalised misogyny’.
Boys deserve the same courtesy- ‘internalised misandry’ is much more preferable.
Ofc it is all just semantics when we have a government which is currently seeking to extend criminal protections for women while refusing to extend the same protection for men.
It is mad to expect boys to engage with a society which objectively considers them less worthy of protection than their female peers.
Social media is warping young mens views showing women as the enemy, just look at the random videos and stories you see.
I can’t tell you number of times I’ve seen a video that had a brat with unrealistic expectations of what a partner should bring and a host making them look stupid. Constant stories of women talking down to men under 6ft and demanding men pay for everything.
Young men are even getting bodyshamed now which I believe is overlooked by many. Then they see arseholes like Tate and listen to their every word about being “Alpha”.
They need to understand that they can’t believe everything they see in Social Media which is the real problem, what chance do they have when they can’t tell social media and reality apart?
And what hope exactly is there to give them?
What nobody seems to discuss is that ‘toxic masculinity’ *doesn’t mean that* *men* *are toxic*, unless you ask a handful of fringe middle-aged gender-essentialist feminists. Toxic masculinity more accurately refers to the self-destructive tendencies *of* masculinity, and specifically in the ways that young men are raised to see themselves and their place in the world. This causes a lot of depression and suicide, because men are isolated and dissuaded from understanding and processing their emotions in a healthy way.
I agree we need to help young men- their mental health as a population breaks my heart- but we are not going to achieve that if we pretend that the way boys are socialised does not predispose them to these issues.
Men will call out society in its role in ignoring men’s mental health, but will call you a poof if you bring up toxic masculinity as the causative factor.
As a woman who’s been sexually assaulted and repeatedly sexually harassed, it’s a bit difficult to forget about toxic masculinity
Two moms at school were talking. One has a well-behaved daughter who helps other kids and the other has two badly-behaved sons who hit other kids. The son-momma told the daughter-momma how lucky she was that she only had a daughter because boys are so much more difficult. Judging by what goes on at school, the son-momma never really tried to teach her kids good behavior because sons so much work. This will need to change
Young men are disillusioned.
People like Andrew Tate don’t just appear out of nowhere.
From their perspective, they have mainstream media telling them that’s there something inherently bad/toxic within them.
Every other identity is celebrated.
They then see people online (like Andrew Tate), telling them that they’re not going crazy and that there is nothing wrong with them.
Who do you think they’re going to listen to?
Noooo you have to tell them they’re all privileged potential rapists, bait them, gaslight them, and then hand them over to Andrew Tait.
Problem: the standards we collectively hold men to
Comments: *Men are _____*
It’s no surprise that individuals are struggling when we don’t recognise entities as individuals. Between social media, cultural narrative and corporate propaganda I feel like I’m constantly being exposed to the *idea* that *treating everyone as an individual* is a good thing. Feels like a pretty bog standard Sesame Street episode to me. Which is why I’m just exasperated at how *little we actually do it.*
11 comments
The highest cause of death in men in the uk is suicide. Men are 3 times more likely to take their own life than women.
We don’t often see this being discussed.
>However, I’d caution the Scottish Government. Humza Yousaf now rightly speaks of “a vision for masculinity that is uplifting and positive so the negative male role models we are all aware of can be challenged”. I applaud this. However, the Government press machine still talks of “toxic masculinity”.
>That mixed messaging is self-defeating. You can present all the positive role models available, but keep telling boys they’re toxic, and they’ll switch off.
Bingo.
There is a reason we do not talk about ‘toxic femininity’ but ‘internalised misogyny’.
Boys deserve the same courtesy- ‘internalised misandry’ is much more preferable.
Ofc it is all just semantics when we have a government which is currently seeking to extend criminal protections for women while refusing to extend the same protection for men.
It is mad to expect boys to engage with a society which objectively considers them less worthy of protection than their female peers.
Social media is warping young mens views showing women as the enemy, just look at the random videos and stories you see.
I can’t tell you number of times I’ve seen a video that had a brat with unrealistic expectations of what a partner should bring and a host making them look stupid. Constant stories of women talking down to men under 6ft and demanding men pay for everything.
Young men are even getting bodyshamed now which I believe is overlooked by many. Then they see arseholes like Tate and listen to their every word about being “Alpha”.
They need to understand that they can’t believe everything they see in Social Media which is the real problem, what chance do they have when they can’t tell social media and reality apart?
And what hope exactly is there to give them?
What nobody seems to discuss is that ‘toxic masculinity’ *doesn’t mean that* *men* *are toxic*, unless you ask a handful of fringe middle-aged gender-essentialist feminists. Toxic masculinity more accurately refers to the self-destructive tendencies *of* masculinity, and specifically in the ways that young men are raised to see themselves and their place in the world. This causes a lot of depression and suicide, because men are isolated and dissuaded from understanding and processing their emotions in a healthy way.
I agree we need to help young men- their mental health as a population breaks my heart- but we are not going to achieve that if we pretend that the way boys are socialised does not predispose them to these issues.
Men will call out society in its role in ignoring men’s mental health, but will call you a poof if you bring up toxic masculinity as the causative factor.
As a woman who’s been sexually assaulted and repeatedly sexually harassed, it’s a bit difficult to forget about toxic masculinity
Two moms at school were talking. One has a well-behaved daughter who helps other kids and the other has two badly-behaved sons who hit other kids. The son-momma told the daughter-momma how lucky she was that she only had a daughter because boys are so much more difficult. Judging by what goes on at school, the son-momma never really tried to teach her kids good behavior because sons so much work. This will need to change
Young men are disillusioned.
People like Andrew Tate don’t just appear out of nowhere.
From their perspective, they have mainstream media telling them that’s there something inherently bad/toxic within them.
Every other identity is celebrated.
They then see people online (like Andrew Tate), telling them that they’re not going crazy and that there is nothing wrong with them.
Who do you think they’re going to listen to?
Noooo you have to tell them they’re all privileged potential rapists, bait them, gaslight them, and then hand them over to Andrew Tait.
Problem: the standards we collectively hold men to
Comments: *Men are _____*
It’s no surprise that individuals are struggling when we don’t recognise entities as individuals. Between social media, cultural narrative and corporate propaganda I feel like I’m constantly being exposed to the *idea* that *treating everyone as an individual* is a good thing. Feels like a pretty bog standard Sesame Street episode to me. Which is why I’m just exasperated at how *little we actually do it.*