What a difference a day makes…
All is well. I got my usual hug and coffee handed to me when I walked in the door and I asked if everything was ok. He still won't give me details but whatever the crisis was, it's over now. Him and gf are fine.
Taking on board what so many of you said, I told him that I loved him, am so proud of him and that he can talk to me at any time, but must never feel obligated to tell me anything he doesn't want to.
We discussed inviting his school friends over to the house and he loves the idea. Today, we're going to spend time together cooking and just messing around. I suggested reducing his screen time and reading YA books and he agreed. If any of you can recommend some good teenage pulp novels, please let me know. I don't think heavy hitting emotional subjects are what he needs right now – just some good fun stories to immerse himself into.
To answer a few repeated questions:
Health: He is under the care of a private gastroenterologist. He has had every available test done and is on a regime of medication. There has been improvement but it's slow going. We are applying for a grant for home schooling.
Father: His dad and I are divorced but his dad is very much on the scene. My son is living with me full time only because of his illness – usually we split custody 50/50. His dad's house is full of other teenagers and only 1 bathroom. It makes sense for him to be with me during this period. His dad calls over often and takes him on small trips out of the house. He's not one to talk of emotions and is rather stoic. But he's a good dad and puts our son first.
And finally, here's the oscar acceptance speech: I want to thank my family, and God for this wonderful award I am so grateful for the amount of support, encouragement, suggestions and advice I got here. We Irish are cynical, begrudging and sarcastic and many of the posts here reflect that. But what is often dismissed is that when one of us genuinely asks for help there is this overwhelming drive to rally round and help each other. That's what happened yesterday.
I recently stumbled across Barry from Wakefield. This adorable man posts daily affirmations and shout outs on YouTube. And today's message really hits the nail on the head. It's like he wrote it just for me.
Each of you who replied to my plea yesterday did a Good Thingtm and you should give yourselves a squeezy hug. You are all angels. Thank you
by Nimmyzed
26 comments
Awh I’m so glad to see this!! Delighted to hear he’s in a better space and yeve a few ways to improve things going forward. Your an amazing parent he’s lucky to have you! x
That’s wonderful news! You sound like such a lovely mum xx
You mentioned pulp books, do you mean like noir etc? If he’s interested in that get him onto Dashiel Hammett, the man who essentially started the pulp genre, and the “hard-boiled” detective. The Maltese Falcon and Red Harvest are fantastic.
The discworld books by Terry pratchet are great fun books
Don’t have many actual suggestions for books but if you can sign him up for a library card, he can request books from any library in Ireland – they normally arrive pretty fast and save you money 🙂
Delighted to hear it’s better today.
The phrase “you’re only as happy as your saddest child” is very accurate at times.
I loved the Darren Shan books when I was a teen
hey, thats cool. as a side bump of the whole thing i think everybody reading this should subscribe to [barry from wakefield](https://youtu.be/GxQ2I4UA_g8?si=lRobUvdP7ly1h_AQ). Barry is a tonic. It would be great if we gave barry more hits and subs. perhaps even making him an honorary irish man.
You’re a great mam x
Yay, so happy the things are better. Teenagers are moody bunch. I volunteer woth scouts and let me tell you, things can go from 0 to 100 in milliseconds.
Well done. Have a great day. You’re a great mum.
Louis L’amour, author of American western , simple but entertaining reads.
If he likes graphic novels or willing to give them a go, I’d say George O Connor’s Olympian series.
For novels, get him sorted with some fantasy – stormlight archive is a series that would keep him engaged, although some-one mentioned Terry Pratchett earlier which is an immense shout!!
Best wishes and if he has any particular interest in types of books, stories post up, I’m sure you’ll get some great targeted recommendations.
Thanks for the Barry from Wakefield steer – we all need positivity
I’d recommend the Red Rising series by Pierce Brown and the Percy Jackson series by Rick Riordan. Glad to hear it all worked out!
I’m glad your son is feeling more himself. As a parent, our job never ends and it’s harder to kiss the boo-boo when they’re older. It’s tricky, trying to be supportive and also mind your business.
When a relationship is online, it has little physical elements, and usually becomes entirely emotional. Those connections feel deeper because we don’t have the physical side and when things go wrong, even a little, it can have a massive impact on you.
All you can do is be there. And on that score, you come up trumps. Well done. Parenting is the weirdest, most difficult job I’ve ever had lol
If he’s into Fantasy then Eragon by Christopher Paolini and its sequels remain some of my favourite books from when I was younger, re-read them as an adult and still loved them.
I also got really into the Wheel of Time as a teenager, bit heavier but there are 14 massive books so it’ll keep him busy for a while
There’s a great Irish comedy fantasy series called Skulduggery Pleasant. Great for easy reading.
The Red Rising books and Pratchett would be a good variety.
I wish every kid in the world had someone like you for a parent. 💜
(I second the Discworld books and the Hobbit!)
Echo the library shout- and the staff in your library will have great advice if he chats about what he might like. Delighted to hear it’s improved
The Red Rising books helped me through a rough period a few years ago. Good books to get lost in for a while
This is the update I wanted this morning!!! So happy
While it’s usually not marketed as YA I’d suggest Brandon Sandersons cosmere think of it like marvel where it’s all one universe. It reads pretty much like a YA book. Could either start with The way of kings part one that is a high fantasy type book like lord of the rings. Or the mistborn series starting with the final empire.
Of the two series mistborn definitely reads more like a YA book and is more accessible. They both take place in a huge universe with plenty of interconnected books to keep him busy.
There’s also the GONE series by Michael Grant I think it was who I absolutely loved when I was a little younger than his age.
Also CHERUB by Michael Muchamore though he might be a bit old to enjoy them as it’s similar to harry potter where the characters start off being 13/14 and age as the series progresses.
His Dark Materials trilogy by Phillip Pullman. Fantasy, multiverse and our souls are animals that can walk and talk.
Pratchett is a great shout. Also Sanderson’s Mistborn Era 1 trilogy. Not completely YA but more than clean enough for teens of any age to read. “The Final Empire” is the first of that series.
Not YA particularly – they’re aimed a little younger – but the Artemis Fowl series are amazing books, and really funny, which might be good for your son. The Eragon series is another personal favourite.