I've just nipped out to the shop for milk and I've only gone and been a twat when coming out of the driveway and treated my wife's car with some involuntary unique detailing.
I'm not going to play myself and go through the insurance for something like this, but I do want to come home with solutions to my cock-up so any suggestions on DIY fixes that have worked in the past would be appreciated.
We've got a young family so ideally I would like to stay together at the very least for the kids but I also don't want my children to grow up knowing what I've done. I know just going out to the shops is the traditional route for Dads. What should I do?
by overgirthed-thirdeye
49 comments
Just go over it with a Sharpie, you’ll be grand
Tell your wife the truth
Also, just fuck up the rest of the car and the current damage will be less noticeable
Your only option is to drive it into a local field & torch it.
Bloody kids these days!
That’ll buff out 😂
Ooooo she gonna be maaaaaaad. But honestly, get it professionally done, home remedies never look as good. You silly sausage!
You scared of your wife or something?
Sending thoughts and prayers
That’s an expensive bottle of milk.
Go and get it sorted by an actual body shop. A diy of this will never turn out nice.
[tap it out](https://youtu.be/y1IpELCTX5w?si=5YHK7jOxJ6tQ_8wE)
You’re going to have to fess up and admit that you’re a useless idiot who shouldn’t be let loose on your own. In the past I told my wife “the bigger boys made me do it”. Bad luck, insurance job if you want it pristine or leave it like it is if it’s a potential shit box.
Tiss just a scratch
I’d be blaming it on a rare dinosaur attack
Take it to a dent repair place. They can work wonders.
Make some mud and sling it on the car, paste it on the scrapey bits.
When she cleans it off then you can blame the scratches on her getting overenthusiastic.
Move to Nepal and live as a goat.
Ask her what she hit with her car, and when she says she has no idea, have a go at her for not even noticing she hit something. The only defence here is to attack first.
I did this to the wife’s Volvo last week.
Get it booked in somewhere (I got a quote for 500 for very similar damage) THEN let her know what happened!
Cover yourself in ketchup and lie down on the driveway. When she gets home weakly point towards the bushes and whisper ‘bear’. Then pretend to pass out from ketchup loss.
You’re gonna have to riddle it with bullet holes, that should take her focus off the scratches.
Just go in and asked her what happened to the car😂
“You should see the other car”
the truth and I would say about £300-350 from a decent repair shop, could be much worse
Show her it and say look what some ¥€#^%**$ did to the car while I was in the shop.
Blame it on a seagull.
You ask the wife when she crashed and scratched the car, then you’ve told her. Offer to pay half to repair it as you love her.
You can’t fix this yourself but somewhere like chips away can help. You won’t be able to hide it from her so just fess up and say you’ll sort it. When its done it’ll be good as new.
Be prepared to spend quite a bit though, that’s going to be expensive to fix.
Im sorry to hear that you walked out of the shops to these scratches down the side of your car.
Its ridiculous that they didnt even have cctv in the car park
“What do I tell the wife”
Are you 10? Why are you treating your wife as if she was your mother?
Unless your job is bodywork repair, don’t even try to DIY. It will look awful.
Simple bodyshop job. Probably £500-£700 depending where you live.
Your wife shouldn’t be mad if it is put back to original condition- it’s just a car.
Eeee fackin come out nowhere eee did!! I fackin looked! I fackin know I did. Thee ooter cooont!!
Do the other side, go faster stripes
Halfords sell paint repair kits for different cars, I had a similar scratch on my Peugeot and they had a kit for £11, worked well enough!
In the third picture it seems you are missing your head. If this was prior to the accident, you shouldn’t have been driving. If it was after the accident, get yourself down A&E pronto.
Either way you’re a danger to yourself and others.
Did you get the milk though? That would be a plus
Take off and nuke the entire site from orbit
The correct answer it to shout “how the hell have you done this!?” Then when she denies having done it, it can only have been someone that’s hit it and driven off 😂
Cover up the damage with cool stickers.
That you’re a sh1t driver??
Why can’t you just tell your wife the truth of what happened?
If you want it to be perfect, take it to a body shop. If you’re happy to settle for better but not perfect, there are plenty of youtube videos about this.
I patched up an almost identical scrape on my shitty 15 year old Zafira and made it look a lot better, but still noticeable if you had a close look at the car.
My sister did something like this, reversing into our brick wall. She was in the car with her husband and kid; me, my wife and my kids all watched. I must remember to ask her what she did to buff it out. Every time I see her from now on 🤣
Find the correct color nail polish
Tell her a spooked horse ran into it
Your can’t tell your wife you fucked up? Bad relationship brother.
Bodyshop fixes this, and you explain what happened as an adult would.
Go back for cigarettes.
It’ll be safe to return in ten to fifteen years.
They’re not unique, they look exactly like the details on my car!
I think it adds “character”. Also makes the car go faster.
Tell her you fucked her sister.
When she stops screaming say just kidding, I dented the car.
Leave a pair of nickers on the back seat. Guarantee she wont notice the scratches.