Just arrived at my hotel, as a Brit abroad I’m wondering, should I finally have a go on one of these?

by AntiSocialMackerel

17 comments

  1. Aren’t bidets supposed to squirt up? This looks like it’d be better suited to washing the lumbar region of your spine.

  4. A bidet?

    Oh fuck yes!

    Once you stop freaking out about a power stream of water abusing and tickling your ring, you will feel super clean!

    You will be convinced that your buttcheeks are audibly squeaking when you walk. You will feel _that clean_ .

  5. That’s the… kids’ toilet.

    – Is it?
    – Yes!

    Why’s it got a plughole and a tap, then?

    Cos it’s for checking your kid’s shit
    before you flush it.

    – Urgh, that’s grim!
    – Yeah, I know.

    That’s the Continentals, innit?
    They’re dirty.

  6. Ah yes, the bidet, a civilization’s most powerful asset. I assume you’re Spain judging by the style it has. In my case, I wasn’t able to decipher how to use them when I was there.

  7. My thought with these is, how do you know when your clean? And then surely you’re wiping yourself to get dry again afterwards?

  9. My wife is Indian, they have hosepipes on all their toilets and are so much better than toilet paper. Hoping to get one installed in future

  11. No, don’t do it. Unless you want to become addicted to bidets and join the absolute force that is the wash yo ass army.

  13. First came across one on a business trip to Taiwan … being the Far East it was fitted to the toilet, extended out automatically when needed, and had an ungodly number of controls on the attached keypad.

    Once I’d figured it the pictograms it was a revelation. You really can’t go back, so budget for getting one fitted when you get home.

    Incidentally, executive class hotels are definitely a lifestyle I could get used to.

  17. I always thought it was a mini bath for babies!

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