From asbestos to white dogshit: Six cherished things of our past the government is pledging to bring back

From asbestos to white dogshit: Six cherished things of our past the government is pledging to bring back



by topotaul

22 comments

  1. My barber is looking forward to performing surgery like the good ol days as well soon. Hopefully they’ll bring back work houses before the GE so I can finally get the kids out of the house too.

  2. I’m voting for polio, who could resist the chance of life in an iron lung.

  3. what, no classic late 80’s football hooliganism? Whats the world coming to?

  4. Can we have stand pipes back as soon as the sun comes out AHH the nostalgia

  5. I would vote if they brought back half penny 10p mixtures !! 20 sweets for 10p ! What’s not to like ?

  6. I like the “satire” flair, that was funny. Pity that Newsthump seems to be up there with PrivateEye these days in journalism quality – far better than many other tabloids.

  7. Smog! Why don’t we have real pea soupers any more? Totally aligned with Tory environmental policies, will kill off some poors, and will remind Ethel (85) of her childhood. Perfect policy!

  8. I want the 3 day week back please!

    Long running power cuts may kill anyone under 25. We might need time to wean them off their phones and internet, lest they get fatal withdrawal.

  9. If they brought back plastic straws and plastic lids, they’d have my vote.

  10. I feel absolutely gaslit when people who were well born into the 90s or even 80s don’t remember dog shits ever being white and powdery. How can you not. I am sure dogs are healthier with diets not made up of just bone but it was all around a better time for literally everyone else.

  11. Wtf happened to furry dogs shits in the 80s? We called them hairy harrys as kids. I’ve heard rumours of calcium in dog food but it sounds like bs.

  12. I can’t tell the satire from the real news anymore…

  13. I read this and thought “a typical not the onion post”

  14. i went on a walk in Chicksands woods Central Bedfordshire and actually found a pile of white dog shit 2 weeks ago…i was taken aback to my youth of NF and Paki’s out sprayed on all the alleyway way walls between the council bungalows
    I had to explain to my young kids why Dad was staring in disbelief at the nostalgia of a tripe enfused dog shit

  15. As far as ammunition against the Tories goes, this article is a handful of turds scraped into the end of a howitzer.

  16. They’ve promised to bring back –
    Leg warmers
    Rag n Bone men
    Coal strikes
    Smoking upstairs on buses

    Ah, the nostalgia.

  18. We should bring back section 28 but make it just for trans people this tim- ah wait.

  19. I want them to bring back being able to take the crown through combat like the old days. I kinda fancy myself as king

  20. WHITE DOGSHIT NOW!!! We aint gonna sufer noe mowah wiv dis forrign doo doos… we wont WITE DOG SHITZ NOW!! Nuffink discrobs the brittish summer thyme more accurft.. akreattly… accurately van ver smewl ov whit dog shitz bakin in the park on an ot zummer day! Bwitish dogz wiv britttish bummz!!

  21. It’s coal for me, the coal man coming round once a mount dropping sacks of carbon for us to take and stack in the coal shed. ,cleaning and lighting the fire first thing in the morning to heat the boiler for a lukewarm shower …. Ahhhhh happy memories

  22. I guess newshump isn’t aware of all the uses of asbestos

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