Zadnji blog post skiperice o Pernaru je objavljen 20.2., a vidim da nitko nije stavio u sub. Neka bude i kraj sage ovdje.

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  1. Relevantni dijelovi:

    >We lost the first 4 fish, hooked stuff waaay tooo big for my gear. **Each time my crew would run up from below, where he spends all his time while we are sailing**, and he would be as excited as a kid at Christmas. He was also similarly crestfallen each time the fish broke my gear and got away. He would just be so disappointed. My crew started pushing me with his negative defeatist quitter attitude, “… Lexi stop fishing it’s just a waste of time… you will never get a fish in…” he tells me with his characteristic self assured certainty.

    >Nothing but a stream of negativity coming up from my crew below already back playing on his phone. He was so sure I was stupid and wrong for what I was doing.

    >My crew was like a child with nintendo hands, soft and delicate. After the third fish we had all the meat we needed and I wanted to stop fishing now. My crew pushed and pushed me to keep catching more more more. I decided to be kind to him and made a deal with him, he had to reel in and kill the next fish we caught. The sociopath has zero empathy or emotional qualms about the killing or the blood bath. Murder doesn’t bother him.

    >Problem was…. **it was like letting a ten year old boy reel in their first fish.** He was ginger and delicate about touching the fish. Slow to do what had to be done. Unsteady and incompetent, the fish was suffering while the child tried to figure out what to do about it, afraid to touch the fish. I had to push him to hurry and end its suffering quickly please, my empathy linking me to the suffering animal.

    >My crew pushed me to keep fishing. I kinda felt that was enough, he had his big fishing adventure story now, we had enough meat. My crew is the kind of guy to not care about other people’s feelings or thoughts or opinions and just keep pushing his own will onto people. I relented again.

    >Half an hour later we caught a rather large TUNA as seen in the video… and I was sobbing like a baby after I killed it. Emotionally I was just spent… that was it… no more fishing… that’s enough crew… stop pushing me… it’s done now. I have decided… this is enough. I do not want to kill anymore today.

    >I had deliberately delayed the release of the last blog for AFTER we set sail for St. Martin. I did not want to deal with my crew’s reaction to all the comments and messages he would get about it. Despite the fact I was being very kind to him in that blog, **I tried to be as nice and positive as I possibly could with him, I really held so much of the horribleness back, I knew the media attention would obsess him.**

    >As we were sailing like 7 miles off the east coast of the little island of St. Barts… my crew got internet connection and, as he does, downloads everything in a batch, then spends hours going thru it all. We were still sailing in rough seas and my crew checked out of reality to get obsessed with his phone again. **He is seldom much help, but now that the grenade of truth went off in Croatia so much louder than even I expected, my crew became ZERO help and got pissy with me like a child.**

    >Sigh…. ohhh well… I did toss the grenade of truth and pre-warned him what I was going to write about. He reacted exactly as a narcissistic child would react, so no surprises there. That night we did not make it all the way to St. Martin, the lighter than expected winds for the first 5 hours that morning delayed us significantly. When we got to anchor in a little island called ile Fourchue, he chose to be mean to me and be unkind, like a child throwing a hissy fit. He was one pissy sociopath that night.

    >Thankfully we did not have cell reception in the little bay behind the hills for the night. This cut him off from the noise coming out of Croatia and helped me get him calm again. The awkward tension and moody silence filled the yacht so thick you could cut it with a knife that night.

    >**By the next morning my little sociopath had calmed down again, and was willing to help with the yacht again. Together we got the anchor up and sails raised before my crew went down below to play on his phone for the rest of the day. The second he got cell service again he became useless and self obsessed again, but by now, I could would and just did everything myself anyway.** I am a good solo sailor.

    >Interestingly, as we were approaching St. Martin and got good cell service, **my phone also blew up that day with dozens and dozens of lovely kind and supportive E-mails from Croatians who read the last blog.** It really surprised me. It was like all the good people of Croatia wanted to just reach out to me to apologize for my Croatian crew and reassure me he does not represent their country. It was like hugs love and kindness from these far away people.

    >My new American crew was scheduled to fly into St. Martin that day, which was the schedule that pushed me into sailing in rough conditions. **My crew stayed below all day not helping at all with anything and playing obsessively on his phone reveling in the media attention.** Honestly I thought it would take several days for that last blog to explode in Croatia, not spread quite so fast like a fire.

    >As we were sailing in I was wrestling about what to do with Ivan upon arrival, **I tried to talk to him about it, but he stuck his fingers in his ears and refused to let me speak a single word or say anything to him. The child really hates to listen to other people. That sort of settled it for me, poor dumb fucker is about to get kicked out on his ass hard for acting like this.**

    >I could have kicked him out immediately upon arrival, I probably should have for his poor attitude and behaviour the last 24 hours, but again I chose to be very kind to him. I decided that I thought he could keep the peace for one more night, his flight was booked for Feb14th (the next day). I had originally agreed to let him stay onboard for the night of Feb13th, I decided to keep my word and let him stay if he could keep the peace.

    >The next day, Feb14th 2022, I dinghied my sociopathic crazy crew to shore, checked him safely into the country, and handed him back his passport and shook his hand and said good-bye forever. I remained civilized kind and polite to the crazy manchild. **After he was gone I broke down in tears twice, flooded with relief.**

    >Of course, the only way a sociopath can ever view the world is with themselves as the eternal good guy and hero and to cast down everybody else. I got tired of him constantly putting me down and belittling me. **Later that day he started texting me crazy stuff about how he was so relieved to make it off my boat alive.**

    >**Dumb shit… he has no idea how hard I worked to protect him from his own stupidity and incompetence, how much I carried him, sheltered and protected him for the last 7 weeks, how much love kindness and tolerance it takes to be near him and not throw him to the sharks. I was nothing but kind to him, but he needs to vilify me now.**

    >It was clear, nothing good can ever come out of him.

    >I blocked him from ever contacting me again.

    >I then deleted him from my phone.
    >Done

    >I could write a book about the last 7 weeks with Ivan but it would be so crazy nobody would believe it.

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