Women: Sexual harassment when running made me quit to stay safe

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c627k523ypgo

by shark-with-a-horn

38 comments

  1. This is why whenever I see women running alone at night I make sure to run behind them following them behind every turn they make to make sure that they are safe.

    Men- sexual harassment stops with us.

  2. I stopped going to the gym after 8pm because men there would always stare at me. I overheard them commenting on how little they’d like to f**k me once. I won’t go in the mornings because there’s a creepy guy who noticed I go in the morning and watches me from his window. It’s fucked.

  3. Boy I can’t wait for a bunch of oblivious men to start commenting

  4. I (male) run a lot and it wasn’t till a few female friends told me their running horror stories that I realised men and women really do have very different lived experiences. I’ve never onced worried about my safety when im getting ready for a run.

  5. My partner was sexually harassed jogging repeatedly by the same bloke and he made further threats. At the time we lived separately and I wasn’t always able to go with her. She applied for a restraining order and had to go to court. The (female) judge refused to listen to her concerns, and denied the restraining order on the grounds it may prevent him gaining employment…. the guy is unemployed on welfare his whole life. 

    Really not sure what the fuck judges are smoking sometimes. 

  6. Just stop it, and let woman run. Don’t say anything you wouldn’t to 6f 18 stone man. I wouldn’t want women to quit running many clubs would welcome any runner at any level.

  7. Commuting by bike with a male colleague has really opened his eyes to how much women get sexually harassed. He really didn’t believe strangers would go up to a woman to comment on their bodies etc until he witnessed it.

  8. It’s sad how many women don’t feel safe in public. My girlfriend hardly goes out without me with her and many women have shared their stories of harassment.

    I just don’t know what the solutions are. New laws? Public safety ads like we do for driving/smoking? Education on harassment? Might be a good start.

  9. My wife quit running due to the amount of pathetic filth yelped at her from passing vehicles and “harmless” beeping at her.

  10. All I do is walk my dog. Even with her, men will sexually harass me or do weird shit like purposefully lean over to blow cigarette smoke at my face when I’m walking past.

    I’ve noticed that groups of 3+ men seem to be more confident with it. Had a few groups stop and stare at me, blocking the path and forcing me to walk into the road with my dog to get past. My dog is scared of cars so it’s really fucking dangerous but what else can I do? I ask them to move over, and they don’t do anything but stare.

  12. All the men saying “I’ve never once felt threatened”, that’s great for you and all, but it doesn’t prove men have it safer. I got punched in the face by a stranger while running in Holyrood Park when I was in uni. No one is properly totally safe.

    Edit: I’m fascinated by people downvoting my lived experience. It’s both sad and a bit terrifying.

  13. Man or woman, never run on your own at night. I’ve never been sexually harassed, but i have been chased. And I’m 6ft n kinda chunky.

  14. I run in Spring/Summer only. It’s sad but I know it’s not safe when dark. It’s not really safe in light either but I know more people are around to assist if I really needed it. I also run with my warrant card just in case I ever have to step in for anyone else.

    The fact I don’t feel safe as a police officer woman (sorry for the poor hot fuzz pun) to run at night is a sorry state of affairs.

    I also rarely go out with “just the girls” or anything like that. It’s not how it should be but I’ll make sure to alter my lifestyle to ensure my safety. Don’t want to say part n parcel cos that’s a ridiculous cop out and I’d love to see it all change but until I do I’ll stick to other safer indoor exercise until then.

  15. I (m) was doing a trail race last year and we turned onto a road for a short while. Some guy on a bike was coming down the road and, as he passed the girl 10m in front of me, shouted “Keep running sugar-tits, ha ha”.
    I was very, very tempted to knock him off his bike as he passed me.

  16. Had a female friend of mine tell me about a guy running alongside her that kept running in front and slowing down and turning around to look at her and grinning.

    He wasn’t even dressed for exercise. Had a jacket Aladdin trousers, sandals and black rimmed wayfarer sunglasses on

    He followed her for half a mile or so and only stopped because she stopped at a bus stop where four or five men she knew were. Even then he loitered stationary to see what she was doing but once she struck up a conversation with one of the guys the follower eventually just ran on.

    She’s never seen him before or since. And the thing that makes me most uncomfortable she looks like she’s in her late teens despite being in her 30’s.

    As a male of the species, a husband and father of a daughter, it’s completely dumbfounded me that anyone would think this would be appropriate.

    And the fear she must have felt at the time must have been incredibly strong, being so close but simultaneously far away from the safety of her home and not wanting to show the creep where she and her children lived.

  17. Women deserve to be left alone when running, that is fact.

  18. I’m male, not a good runner. But who the hell during the pain that is running think ‘oh yeah going to slap that ass’ whilst gasping for air as they get distracted

  19. I’m commenting again but the irony of me being told on this post that men aren’t that bad, while my message requests are full of men sending me the most sexually explicit messages in response to my posting of progress pics in a SWEATSHIRT says it all

  20. Yes this is genuinely exactly why I don’t run. I used to run at University and quit after a prolonged period of harassment. I’m yet to find anyone local willing to run with me plus my schedule isn’t regular enough to commit to someone.

  21. I (NB / AMAB, pass easily, long hair, shaved everywhere, and usually wear long, floaty, hi-low skirts when I head out) regularly get catcalled, harassed, leered and jeered at.

    It’s horrible and at times terrifying. I’ve severely reduced the amount of times I go out after dusk and at night.

    But even worse is in broad daylight, when men will think nothing about harassing me and calling me their bitch, hoe or darling, or saying how much they want to fuck me / how fuckable I am.

    It’s horrific and shows how disgusting men can be.

  23. Maybe I’ve always been lucky where I run but I’ve never been harassed running, female, running when I was 25-39 years. In London, England and wales, and west Europe. Running alone the majority of the time, through streets and parks. There’s a lot of safe places and people around too it seems.

  24. I know someone who went running when they were 14 at the time and had to stop because of all the men shouting out of their car/van windows and beeping their horn at her. It’s absolutely disgusting.

  25. Change is needed for all women not just a few young ladies. I know an elderly woman who was treated horribly by her husband. The old man who has gone crazy wants to sell their tiny little house pay taxes, brokerage, real estate transaction fees, etc etc and take his share to have an adventure of a lifetime that is promised by a 30 year old girl. This issue is not just for the young and fit and pretty but the entire gender. Wish BbC would give more attention and coverage to vulnerable senior citizen women who are facing a serious issue due to lack of empathy by men.

  26. Men never ask what it is about men that makes women choose the bear.

  27. I have mentioned before on here that I quit running outside of the gym due to those in cars slowing down to match my running speed to honking.

    They ask if I want a lift, or make weird “phwoar” sounds to trying to have a conversation with me (?).

  28. In my 60s now and I love not being noticed when I’m out. I had this crap since I was 12 and walking home in my uniform. Always ran in a big group to feel safe but even then I’ve had some scary stuff happen when I walked home after . Why do they feel so entitled?

  29. Worst I’ve had (as a 6’2 out gay man) is a few times this same voice has shouted unintelligible things out the same 4×4. No idea who he is. I’m reasonably confident I could outrun the guy on foot, dunno if I’d be able to fight him off, but I struggle to imagine what it’s like without those options.

    Running is about toxic positivity and Strava boasting, not cat whistles and stalking!

  30. A side effect of our immigration policy. How are people surprised or blind to this? Rape & sexual violence has exploded over the last 10 years.

  31. This has to be area dependent. I live in the lovely countryside and everyone is very pleasant and polite and will say hello/morning to one another.

  32. First incident of cat calling and sexual remarks was when I was 10 years old walking home from girl guides. I’ve got a list as long as I am and so does the majority of girls I’ve spoken about it with.

    I’d like to think times have changed and more men won’t tolerate it in their own presence at least and will do their part to keep it in check amongst their peers… On the other hand, the type to behave this way probably gravitate towards each other and keep to their echo chambers and there will always be creeps lurking. 😕

  33. Shit like this makes me so sad for this country. You think we are at a civilised state of affairs and men do shit like this. Will we ever teach our kids to treat women with respect? Coz that’s what it comes down to.

  34. We need to have serious conversations about the role porn plays in this but our government is worried about banning social media platforms instead. 

  35. As a women I genuinely don’t understand how certain (not all) guys don’t understand women feeling worried when they are close to men who is whistling, making stupid comments  or being near them alone at night. 

    Like if a man was next to a guy who was LOADS bigger than them in every way, would they not feel uncomfortable and nervous too? Like just imagine meeting this huge dude you’d have no chance against in a fight alone at night or this guys being really inappropriate with you. 

     For me it’s not hard to imagine. So can’t guys just think of our experience like that to help them understand? 

    Or do our brains just work differently? 

    It genuinely confuses me when certain guys seem oblivious to why women would feel uncomfortable in certain situations. 

  36. Yep, I used to run outside all the time in Norwich, when I moved to London had to stop!

  37. What type of men is this? Men who were born in this culture or not?

    Some research will give answers

  38. It’s a massive fucking problem but no one seems to have a feasible plan to stop it.

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