I’ll commence studying Danish immediately. I already love pickled herring and rye bread. I’m perfectly willing to pay taxes in exchange for high quality education and health care. I have a huge Lego collection. I ride a bike. What else do I need to do or learn to be ready?

by 2x2darkgreytile

36 comments

  2. Are you an alcoholic?

    Not that you have to be, but it sort of helps.

  3. You need to learn to pronounce “rød grød med fløde”. It is the first step of any naturalization.

  6. We welcome California to the Kingdom of Denmark

  9. I’m sensing a lack of sarcasm in your post. Better get that fixed before we’d even consider you as a dane. Can you tell if this is sarcasm?

  11. We don’t need Americans raising our flag and pretending they want to be danish. We need y’all to fix your country

  13. You need to be drenched in rain 26 days of the month and you will like it, dammit!

  16. Ready for grown up taxes? Jante lov? No guns? People replying with their whole life story when you ask them “how are you doing?”?

  18. Cmon. This is great. I like the humor and the angle. There’s a horrible underlying truth in it. But there’s nothing that can’t be lifted with a little sarcasm and there are no holy cows. That’s as Danish as it gets!

  26. As a Dane in California, this would make my day if I walked past!!

  27. Welcome 🇩🇰 I like to pay my taxes as well, I pay top taxes, which is the top-end tax, based on the political principle that those who earn the most, contribute the most to the state, and I do that with a smile on my face every month. We are actually talking about that maybe (hopefully not) the government have to introduce a “war-tax”, now that the US and Putin clearly have a common agenda. I shall pay that too every month, not with a smile on my face, but with many, not very nice words to the worlds biggest and most 🍊idiot.

  28. You need to learn to make a few dishes as well. Frikadeller with kartofler and brun sovs, Flæskesteg with persillesovs and Karbonader.

  29. Line your walls with Tuborg, preferably Tuborg classic but grøn will do decently

  31. No self respecting Dane would fly a flag like this. Get a proper pole, and only fly the full Danebrog on the approved days please. Better luck next time. Tak for prøve.

    Additional: maybe this will get you incorporated into the København suburb of Malmø, where we sent all the mentally challenged.

  32. You’ll have extra high smørrebrød waiting for you ✌🏼

  33. Watch the movie “Blinkende Lygter” and really immerse yourself into understanding the jokes, if you can quote basically anything in that movie, you’ll be fine.

  34. Rye bread and pickled herring comes with mandatory snaps or akvavit (spiced rectified spirits), no matter if you like it or not, if you can stomach it *at all* or not!
    We have a proud and strong alcohol culture, and as a foreigner it really is a very easy way to win our hearts, by parttaking in it. But our alcohol culture is also out of control, because we are a knotted up people with subject anxiety.
    We do love, however, when someone only sees the good in us, and praises us. Here’s to that! Skål på dét!

  35. Congrats. You are now part of the 2nd happiest country in the world. Up from 23th.

  36. *Danifornia~a~ah…knows how to party*

    *Danifornia…knows how to party*

    *In the citaaay of L.A.*

    *In the citaaay of good ol’ Watts*

    *In the citaaay, the city of Compton*

    *We keep it rockin! We keep it rockin!*

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