Not a fan of this massive fucker at all. Found in my kitchen in Dublin. Any ideas what type it might be?

27 comments
  1. How long did it take to put the fire out after ya burned your kitchen to bits? Ugh I hate spiders. That looks like a common house spider though. Still unpleasant.

  2. That’s your new roommate Claude. He’s from Transylvania, moved in Tuesday night. He won’t pay his fair share of bills but will look creepy enough to keep people you don’t like away from the house.
    Claude’s cool

  3. A giant house spider. Harmless and fast. Probably looking for somewhere to make a nest for mating season in September.

    They are harmless honestly but if it freaks you out, you can try to jar it and throw it out the house. Very hard though as those guys are fast!
    Last option (one I don’t like to do) is killing it. Again? Harmless creature tbh.

  4. It’s just a harmless house spider, I believe it’s female as they are normally larger than the males, as I’ve Never seen anything bigger, I take comfort in that fact.

  5. Awww, he’s some unit! I suppose he wandered in by mistake. It’s rare to see them inside at this time of year.

    Use a pint glass to trap him on the wall, slip a bit of thin cardboard or paper underneath, and when he goes towards the end of the glass, carry it outside and tip him outside so he can enjoy the bit of sun!

  6. St Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland but looked at the house spider and said

    “Don’t worry little guy, the irish need something to look out for in the bath when they go for a piss at 4am”

    Hate spiders but I despise house spiders, you walk out the room to grab a cup to capture the big cunt in and when you come back it’s gone…….nightmare

  7. That’s a facehugger. Don’t worry, she’ll wait until you’re asleep before she gets down to business, and her venom will knock you out before she starts laying her eggs inside your eyeballs, so you probably won’t feel much until they start hatching in a few weeks.

  8. Jesus christ, photos like this should come with a trigger warning for the arachnophobes among us! 🥴🥴🥴

    But it looks like a common house spider. The ones that are everywhere in August/September/October and the ones that give me the most fear inducing anxiety of my fuckin’ life. RUN FOR THE HILLS, SAVE YOURSELF!!!!

  9. I’ve had 3 of those bastards in my bedroom. All right above my bed at night when I’m lying in it. When’s there’s one, there’s more. I tried everything to kill them – bleach, Airsoft gun, insect killer, none of them worked. Only solution was putting shoes on and stomping on the big bastards. Enjoy suffering my nightmare

  10. I researched them when my house was infested a few years ago, so here’s my Giant House Spider FAQ:

    Q: What the hell is it?

    A: It’s a giant house spider.

    Q: I know like but what species? What class of an arachnid are we dealing with here?

    A: The thing is they’re actually officially, scientifically, called “Giant House Spiders” – Eratigena atrica

    Q: Christ. Can it hurt me?

    A: No. If they bite at all, it isn’t harmful. I’ve seen a vid on youtube of a guy doing everything he could to provoke one, spilled his pint on purpose and everything, and no bite. Either that guy happened to find SpiderGandhi, or they can’t bite.

    Q: What’s with the giant mouth parts then?

    A: Those are ancient arachnid proto-limbs called pedipalps, which in spiders like this are sperm-transferal devices.

    Q: Sperm-transferal ?

    A: …

    Q: They’re speedy fuckers.

    A: Yes they are possibly the fastest species of spider in the world.

    Q: Aren’t they called Tegenaria?

    A: Apparently they were until last year, when a new paper reclassified lots of them. Eratigena is an anagram.

    Q: Can I read a story about them in the New Yorker magazine?

    A: Sure: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2008/03/24/april-paris

    Sources:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_house_spider#Speed

    http://bugguide.net/node/view/31449

    http://www.spiders.us/species/eratigena-atrica/#about

    http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/zoj.12040/abstract

    The bite video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7250P3eVCuM

  11. You will need a cat.

    Cats do not catch spiders. Cats will stare at a blank spot on the wall, or ceiling, leading you to believe you have ghosts in your house, resulting in you no longer caring about that enormous spider.

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