The chance for a better future for all scots, past and present
One in which we vote Nessie as FM and they eat all the racists and bigots and shite them out.
Salad
a wild haggis
A single snowflake drifting past my window in mid August
Around 14 years ago, while walking on the outskirts of Kingswells, Aberdeenshire my friend and I saw what could be only described as a panther/jaguar.
It was certainly not a dog and obviously far too large to be a domestic cat or even a lynx.
We were walking our dog and it was uncharacteristically timid right before we saw it.
There had been rumours of wild large cats in Aberdeenshire at the time, never thought I’d actually see it.
For one reason or another I ended up at a T’Pau concert in Glasgow, I think, as we walked up to the bridge to the venue, a guy pushed through us and ran through the doors.
A second later another man ran through the doors and fired a blow dart at the guy that was running.
Very odd.
I literally saw a haggis fighting a unicorn
On a dark winters night, about four o’clock in the afternoon, as I was walking my dog, I came across a ghastly spectral figure, which caused my dog to stand and growl, the hair on her back raised.
The spectral figure wore a kilt and bonnet, and turned its baleful eye towards me and asked: “Do y’all know the way to the castle ? I’m tracing my ancestors”
It was the dreaded American Tourist With Scottish Ancestry itself !
I pointed my finger in the direction of the castle, and the figure turned in that direction.
As it faded from view, my dog calmed down.
An old person picking up after their dog has gone number 2.
Several years ago when I was meeting the woman who would later on become my wife for the first time, we saw a Seagull hunt pigeons on Buchanan street Glasgow by swooping down from a building and kicking the pigeons in midair, it broke one pigeon’s wing but couldn’t kill it and eat it because a woman stopped it.
A fox and a badger walking through a field together, then they both noticed me and looked at eachother and walked separate ways, as though I’d caught them out.
The sun
North American Mountain Lion carrying a pheasant in its mouth crossing the A709 at the Lochar Moss recycling centre at the back of ten at night, back in summer 2009. Yes I saw it very clearly. It was very real, but nobody believes it. The whole Beast of X is just too much of a tabloid joke.
My gran hovering over the toilet to take a pish so she didn’t have to make contact with the toilet seat. Never again did I barge through a bathroom door without knocking.
Sunshine for more than an hour…. Hand to God… Truly terrifying
I once saw 2 crows work together to steal a seagulls eggs, one led the gull away, and the other stole an egg, the gull then chased the crow with the egg and the other crow stole the other egg. I love crows.
An orca just off Aberdeen pleasure beach. Seemed to by itself. Maybe bummed out that it was too big for ramboland
The sun
An albino squirrel, in Morningside.
Sorry, THE Albino Squirrel of Morningside.
When I was about 14/15 I was sitting outside in my street waiting for my friends to come out after school. Sat there by myself when all of a sudden there’s a loud thud sound about 10 meters off to my right in the road and a few bits of something scatter past my feet. In the middle of the road there was a pile of ice. All the stuff that had gone skidding off in different directions was ice as well. It was mid June. I thought maybe my friend had thrown it out a window to scare me or something but some of those bits of ice in the street were the size of tennis balls and there was dozens of chunks lying around. It melted within a few minutes and it had taken a chunk out the tarmac where it hit. My friend came outside and I tried to tell him what happened but all he could see was a puddle of water in the road and so he told me I was full of shit.
A squirrel holding a whole battered sausage whilst sitting on a bin in the botanic gardens.
Saw a ghost in Pitlochry hydro hotel
My mate Ian buy a round
I did the midnight tour of the street that was closed off during the plague times.
I was invited by a friend who believes in the occult. I’m an atheist and don’t believe in any of that rubbish.
During the tour they tell of a merchant that killed redhead prostitutes in the back room. While we were in there, men had to stand to one side and women another.
They turned off the lights as the tale was told and I saw very dimly in the low light, the shadow of a tall man wearing a duster and a wide brimmed hat walking towards me from the door. The floor was small stones and he was making no sound.
He was nearly at me when the light came back on. And there was no-one there. Not even anyone that could have been the shadow.
There was also no way a mechanism could have been hidden in the roof as some phoney magic trick.
I can’t explain it. And I don’t believe in ghosts. But I know what I saw.
I saw ball lightning in Edinburgh about 25 years ago.
Around 2001 I was staying up really late playing Pokémon Blue on my Gameboy with a worm light, when after a bit I got up to stand by the bay window before I went to sleep.
So, I saw a UFO. Nobody believed me. Nobody believes me still. It was about 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning. It was pitch black so I was only able to recognise it by the lights on its underside. 3 lights arraying 3 points in a triangular fashion, with one in the centre. The UFO moved about in the sky in a way that today we recognise as “anti-gravity”. It moved exactly the way a fly moved. No build up to acceleration, no drag. It was insane. After a while of flitting about the sky the lights seemed to begin to glow in intensity, before the whole thing blinked out of existence. I spent the rest of the night under the covers absolutely bricking it.
I never forgot that night, and tried googling it about 10 years later after the internet had become. More developed. Turns out it’s a fairly commonly recognisable UFO called a TR-3B, or “black triangle UFO”. They’ve seemingly been sighted all over the globe, and I think they’re likely to be experimental craft rather than extraterrestrial. Later found out that the Scottish Borders are actually used as testing grounds for planes, so adds a bit of credence I guess.
Anyway, I super believe in anti-grav tech now. I’ve seen it. Found a reddit thread of modern photos of what looks like the craft I saw:
American submarines coming into faslane for repairs
My partner and I saw something moving in the sky in the central belt. This was fairly recently – she thinks it was a satellite but I don’t think we’d be able to see them either the naked eye? It was moving in a square formation then would go back on itself – basically looked like a moving star and was ‘blinking.’ (Not sure if it was actually blinking but like when you try to look at Mars when it’s visible and it kind of twinkles red and blue.)
I remember being around 7 or 8 and my dad took me, my brother and sister to go collect my mum from work in Kilsyth (We lived in Cumbernauld at the time). I can remember going down Howe Road under a railway bridge and having the need to look behind me out the window. I swear there in the field next to the bridge was a UFO, like the stereotypical flying saucer just sat in the field. It watched it until we went under the bridge and lost sight of it. To this day, no-one in that car remembers seeing it, whenever I bring it up, my dad, brother and sister all deny ever seeing it or even remembering the car journey, but for me it’s a flashbulb memory that’s 22 years later I can still see clear as day.
Was driving through the middle of no where through some back roads surrounded by fields when out of no where a man in a kilt jumps out of a hedge brandishing a sword. And it was a big sword like a claymore.
Took me a few seconds to process what I’d just seen and still don’t have an explanation for it.
A bright, diamond shaped glowing object a couple of thousand feet in the sky just outside of Callander, it stayed completely stationary and as we drove under it the cars radio turned to static.
When I was a child I saw a hooded black figure outside my gran’s window.
I met the faeries one night, in a glen up in the Eastern Cairngorms. Life changing experience. No hallucinogens were involved. But like, no cunts ever gonna believe this shit.
Could write a book about this wild 20min experience.
I once saw an Aberdonian buy a round of drinks, honest.
A red squirrel on the old railway cycle path in Edinburgh.
Ma gran with a whiskey playing 2 player crash bash on ps1 on her own with both controllers oot
Wildcat – I think – tearing along a field when I was walking out in the country. It was going a fair speed.
Noone walking dogs nearby, odd behaviour for a domestic cat, too big to be a rabbit, wrong colour for a fox…
The Wallabies on Inchconnachan in Loch Lomond. Everyone thinks they’re some sort of urban legend but they’re real.
Everyone will believe me now because of what they’ve seen on the news. But I’ve always told people to be careful on the moors south of Inverness. I vividly remember seeing a pack of ~20 wild boar on Saddle hill about 15 years ago. Haven’t dared go up since
A regular waste bin at Glasgow central station
I saw a documentary when I was a child about marine life by the corals. I swear to God I saw a pink shark because after that I vividly remember in my colouring book I coloured my sharks pink for that reason.
My friend and I were walking back to his place absolutely hammered and he stopped to spew against a wall. He was bent over hurling his guts up and a cat appeared on the wall and proceeded to jump onto his back and have a nice lie down. He then stumbled down the road retching, still bent over horizontal and carrying this cat who was just lounging like a fanciful queen. I couldn’t stop laughing and whenever I tell this story people tend to give a doubtful acceptance of it. I can’t convey enough just how hilarious it was.
I once saw the bagpiper outside Edinburgh castle shat himself and he carried on playing The Flower Of Scotland with bisto best running down his legs.True.
Years ago I was camping beside the River Morar, and it was a busy evening with families doing similar; the weather was warm and everyone was relaxing with twilight shadows dappled across the sand and water. The river was perfectly still and it was quiet. I noticed a few darker shadows on the middle of the river which seemed to be moving. And then I heard some padding noises, as if something was breaking the tension of the water surface. And then, no joke, around 20 black clad scuba divers silently popped their heads from under the surface, before rising and exiting the river. They never said anything. They looked like some slick rubber clad BDSM ninjas and moved at ease from the water, jogged across the sand and then disappeared.
I turned around and no one else was paying attention. I asked a nearby group of people and they laughed and said it was nonsense and they surely would have heard them. It definitely happened, but no one believes me.
45 comments
A dark shadow in Loch Ness…
The chance for a better future for all scots, past and present
One in which we vote Nessie as FM and they eat all the racists and bigots and shite them out.
Salad
a wild haggis
A single snowflake drifting past my window in mid August
Around 14 years ago, while walking on the outskirts of Kingswells, Aberdeenshire my friend and I saw what could be only described as a panther/jaguar.
It was certainly not a dog and obviously far too large to be a domestic cat or even a lynx.
We were walking our dog and it was uncharacteristically timid right before we saw it.
There had been rumours of wild large cats in Aberdeenshire at the time, never thought I’d actually see it.
For one reason or another I ended up at a T’Pau concert in Glasgow, I think, as we walked up to the bridge to the venue, a guy pushed through us and ran through the doors.
A second later another man ran through the doors and fired a blow dart at the guy that was running.
Very odd.
I literally saw a haggis fighting a unicorn
On a dark winters night, about four o’clock in the afternoon, as I was walking my dog, I came across a ghastly spectral figure, which caused my dog to stand and growl, the hair on her back raised.
The spectral figure wore a kilt and bonnet, and turned its baleful eye towards me and asked: “Do y’all know the way to the castle ? I’m tracing my ancestors”
It was the dreaded American Tourist With Scottish Ancestry itself !
I pointed my finger in the direction of the castle, and the figure turned in that direction.
As it faded from view, my dog calmed down.
An old person picking up after their dog has gone number 2.
Several years ago when I was meeting the woman who would later on become my wife for the first time, we saw a Seagull hunt pigeons on Buchanan street Glasgow by swooping down from a building and kicking the pigeons in midair, it broke one pigeon’s wing but couldn’t kill it and eat it because a woman stopped it.
A fox and a badger walking through a field together, then they both noticed me and looked at eachother and walked separate ways, as though I’d caught them out.
The sun
North American Mountain Lion carrying a pheasant in its mouth crossing the A709 at the Lochar Moss recycling centre at the back of ten at night, back in summer 2009. Yes I saw it very clearly. It was very real, but nobody believes it. The whole Beast of X is just too much of a tabloid joke.
My gran hovering over the toilet to take a pish so she didn’t have to make contact with the toilet seat. Never again did I barge through a bathroom door without knocking.
Sunshine for more than an hour…. Hand to God… Truly terrifying
I once saw 2 crows work together to steal a seagulls eggs, one led the gull away, and the other stole an egg, the gull then chased the crow with the egg and the other crow stole the other egg. I love crows.
An orca just off Aberdeen pleasure beach. Seemed to by itself. Maybe bummed out that it was too big for ramboland
The sun
An albino squirrel, in Morningside.
Sorry, THE Albino Squirrel of Morningside.
When I was about 14/15 I was sitting outside in my street waiting for my friends to come out after school. Sat there by myself when all of a sudden there’s a loud thud sound about 10 meters off to my right in the road and a few bits of something scatter past my feet. In the middle of the road there was a pile of ice. All the stuff that had gone skidding off in different directions was ice as well. It was mid June. I thought maybe my friend had thrown it out a window to scare me or something but some of those bits of ice in the street were the size of tennis balls and there was dozens of chunks lying around. It melted within a few minutes and it had taken a chunk out the tarmac where it hit. My friend came outside and I tried to tell him what happened but all he could see was a puddle of water in the road and so he told me I was full of shit.
A squirrel holding a whole battered sausage whilst sitting on a bin in the botanic gardens.
Saw a ghost in Pitlochry hydro hotel
My mate Ian buy a round
I did the midnight tour of the street that was closed off during the plague times.
I was invited by a friend who believes in the occult. I’m an atheist and don’t believe in any of that rubbish.
During the tour they tell of a merchant that killed redhead prostitutes in the back room. While we were in there, men had to stand to one side and women another.
They turned off the lights as the tale was told and I saw very dimly in the low light, the shadow of a tall man wearing a duster and a wide brimmed hat walking towards me from the door. The floor was small stones and he was making no sound.
He was nearly at me when the light came back on. And there was no-one there. Not even anyone that could have been the shadow.
There was also no way a mechanism could have been hidden in the roof as some phoney magic trick.
I can’t explain it. And I don’t believe in ghosts. But I know what I saw.
I saw ball lightning in Edinburgh about 25 years ago.
Around 2001 I was staying up really late playing Pokémon Blue on my Gameboy with a worm light, when after a bit I got up to stand by the bay window before I went to sleep.
So, I saw a UFO. Nobody believed me. Nobody believes me still. It was about 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning. It was pitch black so I was only able to recognise it by the lights on its underside. 3 lights arraying 3 points in a triangular fashion, with one in the centre. The UFO moved about in the sky in a way that today we recognise as “anti-gravity”. It moved exactly the way a fly moved. No build up to acceleration, no drag. It was insane. After a while of flitting about the sky the lights seemed to begin to glow in intensity, before the whole thing blinked out of existence. I spent the rest of the night under the covers absolutely bricking it.
I never forgot that night, and tried googling it about 10 years later after the internet had become. More developed. Turns out it’s a fairly commonly recognisable UFO called a TR-3B, or “black triangle UFO”. They’ve seemingly been sighted all over the globe, and I think they’re likely to be experimental craft rather than extraterrestrial. Later found out that the Scottish Borders are actually used as testing grounds for planes, so adds a bit of credence I guess.
Anyway, I super believe in anti-grav tech now. I’ve seen it. Found a reddit thread of modern photos of what looks like the craft I saw:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Whatisthisplane/comments/1fwrvns/do_we_have_any_idea_what_this_is_yet/
American submarines coming into faslane for repairs
My partner and I saw something moving in the sky in the central belt. This was fairly recently – she thinks it was a satellite but I don’t think we’d be able to see them either the naked eye? It was moving in a square formation then would go back on itself – basically looked like a moving star and was ‘blinking.’ (Not sure if it was actually blinking but like when you try to look at Mars when it’s visible and it kind of twinkles red and blue.)
I remember being around 7 or 8 and my dad took me, my brother and sister to go collect my mum from work in Kilsyth (We lived in Cumbernauld at the time). I can remember going down Howe Road under a railway bridge and having the need to look behind me out the window. I swear there in the field next to the bridge was a UFO, like the stereotypical flying saucer just sat in the field. It watched it until we went under the bridge and lost sight of it. To this day, no-one in that car remembers seeing it, whenever I bring it up, my dad, brother and sister all deny ever seeing it or even remembering the car journey, but for me it’s a flashbulb memory that’s 22 years later I can still see clear as day.
Was driving through the middle of no where through some back roads surrounded by fields when out of no where a man in a kilt jumps out of a hedge brandishing a sword. And it was a big sword like a claymore.
Took me a few seconds to process what I’d just seen and still don’t have an explanation for it.
A bright, diamond shaped glowing object a couple of thousand feet in the sky just outside of Callander, it stayed completely stationary and as we drove under it the cars radio turned to static.
When I was a child I saw a hooded black figure outside my gran’s window.
I met the faeries one night, in a glen up in the Eastern Cairngorms. Life changing experience. No hallucinogens were involved. But like, no cunts ever gonna believe this shit.
Could write a book about this wild 20min experience.
I once saw an Aberdonian buy a round of drinks, honest.
A red squirrel on the old railway cycle path in Edinburgh.
Ma gran with a whiskey playing 2 player crash bash on ps1 on her own with both controllers oot
Wildcat – I think – tearing along a field when I was walking out in the country. It was going a fair speed.
Noone walking dogs nearby, odd behaviour for a domestic cat, too big to be a rabbit, wrong colour for a fox…
The Wallabies on Inchconnachan in Loch Lomond. Everyone thinks they’re some sort of urban legend but they’re real.
Everyone will believe me now because of what they’ve seen on the news. But I’ve always told people to be careful on the moors south of Inverness. I vividly remember seeing a pack of ~20 wild boar on Saddle hill about 15 years ago. Haven’t dared go up since
A regular waste bin at Glasgow central station
I saw a documentary when I was a child about marine life by the corals. I swear to God I saw a pink shark because after that I vividly remember in my colouring book I coloured my sharks pink for that reason.
My friend and I were walking back to his place absolutely hammered and he stopped to spew against a wall. He was bent over hurling his guts up and a cat appeared on the wall and proceeded to jump onto his back and have a nice lie down. He then stumbled down the road retching, still bent over horizontal and carrying this cat who was just lounging like a fanciful queen. I couldn’t stop laughing and whenever I tell this story people tend to give a doubtful acceptance of it. I can’t convey enough just how hilarious it was.
I once saw the bagpiper outside Edinburgh castle shat himself and he carried on playing The Flower Of Scotland with bisto best running down his legs.True.
Years ago I was camping beside the River Morar, and it was a busy evening with families doing similar; the weather was warm and everyone was relaxing with twilight shadows dappled across the sand and water. The river was perfectly still and it was quiet. I noticed a few darker shadows on the middle of the river which seemed to be moving. And then I heard some padding noises, as if something was breaking the tension of the water surface. And then, no joke, around 20 black clad scuba divers silently popped their heads from under the surface, before rising and exiting the river. They never said anything. They looked like some slick rubber clad BDSM ninjas and moved at ease from the water, jogged across the sand and then disappeared.
I turned around and no one else was paying attention. I asked a nearby group of people and they laughed and said it was nonsense and they surely would have heard them. It definitely happened, but no one believes me.
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