Stayed at an air bnb with my girlfriend over the weekend. They had this hanging up and we could not make sense of any of it apart from g for gov’nor maybe?

by hazyharv

14 comments

  1. It’s not really cockney, it’s a joke alternative phonetic alphabet and it tells you want it is

    A for horses (hay for horses)

    B for mutton (beef or mutton)

    C for miles (see for miles)

    D for Dumb (deaf or dumb)

    E for Brick (heave a brick)

    etc. It’s mostly just very old fashioned references which is why it’s not obvious

  4. Just say each one out loud and then it becomes clear e.g.

    Hay for horses. Beef or Mutton, See for miles, Deaf or dumb, Heave a Brick, Effalump, Cheif of Police, Age for retirement, Ivor Novello (a composer), Jaffa Oranges, Hell for Leather (an idiomatic expression), Emphasis, Hen for Eggs, Over the Fence, Queue for a Bus, etc

  5. Hay for horses. Beef or mutton. See for miles. Deaf or dumb. Heave a brick. Hefferlump (a humorous pronunciation of elephant). Chief of police. Age for retirement. Ivor Novello (an actor). Jaffa oranges. K for Restaurant I’m afraid I can’t get. Hell for leather. Emphasis. Hen for eggs. Over the fence. Pee for relief. Queue for a bus. Half a cock linnet. It’s for you. Teeth or gums. You for me. Vive la France. Trouble you for a quid. Eggs for breakfast. Wife or mistress.

  6. My Nan used to say efferlump instead of elephant. I guess she wasn’t completely mad

  7. Not a cockney but I got most of them:

    Hay for Horse
    Beef or Mutton
    See for Miles
    Deaf or Dumb
    Heave a Brick
    Hefalump
    Chief of Police
    ?
    Ivor Novello
    Jaffa Orange
    ?
    Hell for Leather
    Emphasis
    Hen for Eggs
    Over the Fence
    Pee for Relief
    Queue for a Bus
    Half a Cockle innit(?)
    It’s for You
    Teeth for Gums
    Your for Me
    Via La France
    Trouble you for a Quid?
    Eggs for Breakfast
    Wife or Mistress
    ?

  8. A (hay) for horses.

    B for (beef or) mutton.

    C (see) for miles.

    D for (deaf or) dumb.

    E for (heave a) brick.

    F for lump (hefferlump, elephant).

    G for (chief of) police.

    H (age) for retirement.

    I for (Ivor) Novello (songwriter).

    J for (Jaffa) oranges.

    K for (Café or) restaurant.

    L (hell) for leather (to do something recklessly).

    M for sis (emphasis).

    N (hen) for eggs.

    O for (over) the fence.

    P (pee) for relief.

    Q (queue) for a bus.

    R for (half a) cock linnet (“minute” in Cockney).

    S (it’s) for you.

    T for (Teeth or) gums.

    U (you) for me.

    V for (Vive la) France.

    X (eggs) for breakfast.

    Y for (wife or) mistress.

    Z for (zephyr) breeze (old name for a West wind).

    Edited to add – I’ve just noticed the name in the window (reversed) in the K (café) box is [E Pellicci](https://youtu.be/LXBmSnVmFjQ?si=WPSYbYF33qF43j0T), one of London’s most famous “caffs’. Nice touch 🙂

  11. This is actually very clever.

    Plus it made me remember my old man said follow the van

  13. This I think came in after the war, my nan taught it to me, she and her mates in the WRAF used to use it as a fun alternative to the Mike Tango Echo stuff.

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