1940, Battle of France: Barry skips the fighting without notifying his allies. 100.000 French casualties over a month, versus 3.000 British casualties. 80 years of movies glorifying themselves after the war
i mean, i agree partially
mainly because we always went for naval power over land power and avoided fighting land conflicts as much as possible, being an island and all it’s the smartest decision, it’s why the RN got most the military budget
but with Waterloo, Brits did most the fighting, with help from the Dutch,Hanover,Brunswick and Nassau, Blucher did have more troops turn up to ultimately overwhelm Napoleon but the majority of the fighting that day was British but even Wellington called it a close run thing
‘Give me night or give me Blucher’
Hans had to fight most his wars like that because he’s slap bang in the middle of the continent with enemies on all sides
30 years war being hosted by us was probably not a great idea.
Rent Free
At least I think we can all agree that the best **ally** to have is Saxony… best at running away just before a battle.
I’ll have you know there was one British unit at the Battle of Leipzig, the 2nd Rocket Troop – clearly, they were critical and the whole battle hinged on them. (But in the dim possibility not, apart from Waterpoo you’re welcome for all the monies and giving Boney virtually no access to the wider world and savages’ resources, his first major defeats, the bleeding ulcer to his south, etc.)
1812 was a side show given were also busy booting Pierre back north of the Pyrenees at the same time.
Indeed some of the people who fought in Spain, once that war ended, then went and burned Washington DC.
How about a 100 years war hans.
It’s funny that you mentioned 3 wars in which Germany wasnt even a country yet…
Bitva na Bílé Hoře
( battle of the White mountain, for non – ř – speakers )
Don’t forget the Zulu war. The only war in known history where a technologically vastly inferior empire won against a technologically vastly superior empire
At least this one song was very cool
Forgot Teutoberg forest. Primordial Hans vs the greatest empire the world has ever seen. Hans at a technological disadvantage. Still wins due to being beasts. (And having a Roman general helping out a bit…)
In WW1 the central powers where outnumbered 1:6² and they were completely surrounded by enemies. Still, they held themselves for over 4 years and lost 20% less soldiers. The war ended with an armstice. So a draw¹.
In WW2, the German was able to hold themselves for 6 years. It wasn’t until enough nations had joined the allies that the axis was again outnumbered 1:6 that the allies were able to push Germany back. The axis military lost 10% less men than the allies on the western front. On the eastern front, they lost about half as many as the enemy. And can you really say Germany was defeated, when not even a decade later, they became one of the most powerful nations in the world?
1) if you sqint hard enough
2) counting total population
Are you ok today Hans? Do you need a hug? 🫶
Fighting your own wars? Skill issue. You’re supposed to franchise them out to provinces, colonies, and buffer states.
You ignored 2 of the most important
Did somebody serve Hans his beer in the wrong glass today? Why’s he coming after us?
Also, not sure you should be boasting, midget-Hans:
Barry you also had the glorious cod war with Iceland.
Average João conflict:
Outnumbered 4 to 1
You forgot about Sedanschlacht, greatest day of my life
Average Hans vs Barry conflict: Barry wins
The Battle of Minden is more our style. Outnumbered but plucky Brits get sent the wrong orders and advance towards Certain Death, only to accidentally beat the Frogs and win the day! Hoorah! Also Minden Day August 1st = Yorkshire Day.
Average Hans “war” in HRE : fights his cousin only for a village, sends 3 drunk men, nobody knows who won
You forgot the other 18182767281 battles between the [Insert generic german dutchy] and the [Insert generic german Kingdom] that lead to the marriage of [Insert generic german noble Houses], wich lead to a war with [Insert generic austrian dutchy], wich dont show up in all the victory statistics france always wins.
Interesting, let’s see who financed Hans and their naval record
Your forgetting something Hans
30 years war? Bunch of amateurs we had a 100 year war with Barry.
Average Pedro(TM) conflict:
One side has Pedro, and a bunch of nations
the other side has Pedro, and another bunch of nations
There are two pedros inside us.
Last time we were a single united Pedro, the whole world bled. Empires fell.
We now say in our eternal slumber.
France casualy being present in 5 of the 6 battle/war
💪😎😎😎🇨🇵🐓🐓🇨🇵😎😎😎☝️
We are a sea fairing nation this would be like us comparing battles likeTrafalgar the 3 major naval battles you have ever fought.(ps we did all the work at Waterloo and despite what the savages may say we won the war of 1812)
Cope and seeth
Tbf that’s their colonial wars, the War of the Roses inspired GoT
34 comments
1940, Battle of France: Barry skips the fighting without notifying his allies. 100.000 French casualties over a month, versus 3.000 British casualties. 80 years of movies glorifying themselves after the war
i mean, i agree partially
mainly because we always went for naval power over land power and avoided fighting land conflicts as much as possible, being an island and all it’s the smartest decision, it’s why the RN got most the military budget
but with Waterloo, Brits did most the fighting, with help from the Dutch,Hanover,Brunswick and Nassau, Blucher did have more troops turn up to ultimately overwhelm Napoleon but the majority of the fighting that day was British but even Wellington called it a close run thing
‘Give me night or give me Blucher’
Hans had to fight most his wars like that because he’s slap bang in the middle of the continent with enemies on all sides
30 years war being hosted by us was probably not a great idea.
Rent Free
At least I think we can all agree that the best **ally** to have is Saxony… best at running away just before a battle.
I’ll have you know there was one British unit at the Battle of Leipzig, the 2nd Rocket Troop – clearly, they were critical and the whole battle hinged on them. (But in the dim possibility not, apart from Waterpoo you’re welcome for all the monies and giving Boney virtually no access to the wider world and savages’ resources, his first major defeats, the bleeding ulcer to his south, etc.)
1812 was a side show given were also busy booting Pierre back north of the Pyrenees at the same time.
Indeed some of the people who fought in Spain, once that war ended, then went and burned Washington DC.
How about a 100 years war hans.
It’s funny that you mentioned 3 wars in which Germany wasnt even a country yet…
Bitva na Bílé Hoře
( battle of the White mountain, for non – ř – speakers )
Don’t forget the Zulu war. The only war in known history where a technologically vastly inferior empire won against a technologically vastly superior empire
At least this one song was very cool
Forgot Teutoberg forest. Primordial Hans vs the greatest empire the world has ever seen. Hans at a technological disadvantage. Still wins due to being beasts. (And having a Roman general helping out a bit…)
In WW1 the central powers where outnumbered 1:6² and they were completely surrounded by enemies. Still, they held themselves for over 4 years and lost 20% less soldiers. The war ended with an armstice. So a draw¹.
In WW2, the German was able to hold themselves for 6 years. It wasn’t until enough nations had joined the allies that the axis was again outnumbered 1:6 that the allies were able to push Germany back. The axis military lost 10% less men than the allies on the western front. On the eastern front, they lost about half as many as the enemy. And can you really say Germany was defeated, when not even a decade later, they became one of the most powerful nations in the world?
1) if you sqint hard enough
2) counting total population
Are you ok today Hans? Do you need a hug? 🫶
Fighting your own wars? Skill issue. You’re supposed to franchise them out to provinces, colonies, and buffer states.
You ignored 2 of the most important
Did somebody serve Hans his beer in the wrong glass today? Why’s he coming after us?
Also, not sure you should be boasting, midget-Hans:
https://preview.redd.it/qipo8bi43gse1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=191dbacf0651c1ea026f861e783de369712d8d79
[removed]
Barry you also had the glorious cod war with Iceland.
Average João conflict:
Outnumbered 4 to 1
You forgot about Sedanschlacht, greatest day of my life
Average Hans vs Barry conflict: Barry wins
The Battle of Minden is more our style. Outnumbered but plucky Brits get sent the wrong orders and advance towards Certain Death, only to accidentally beat the Frogs and win the day! Hoorah! Also Minden Day August 1st = Yorkshire Day.
Average Hans “war” in HRE : fights his cousin only for a village, sends 3 drunk men, nobody knows who won
You forgot the other 18182767281 battles between the [Insert generic german dutchy] and the [Insert generic german Kingdom] that lead to the marriage of [Insert generic german noble Houses], wich lead to a war with [Insert generic austrian dutchy], wich dont show up in all the victory statistics france always wins.
Interesting, let’s see who financed Hans and their naval record
Your forgetting something Hans
30 years war? Bunch of amateurs we had a 100 year war with Barry.
Average Pedro(TM) conflict:
One side has Pedro, and a bunch of nations
the other side has Pedro, and another bunch of nations
There are two pedros inside us.
Last time we were a single united Pedro, the whole world bled. Empires fell.
We now say in our eternal slumber.
France casualy being present in 5 of the 6 battle/war
💪😎😎😎🇨🇵🐓🐓🇨🇵😎😎😎☝️
We are a sea fairing nation this would be like us comparing battles likeTrafalgar the 3 major naval battles you have ever fought.(ps we did all the work at Waterloo and despite what the savages may say we won the war of 1812)
Cope and seeth
Tbf that’s their colonial wars, the War of the Roses inspired GoT
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