27 comments

1. As someone with a hidden disability, yes, this is so unfortunately common that I can’t even count how many times ive been discriminated against in some way just this year

2. Once on the Victoria line a woman got on and she may have been elderly, but maybe not? Back in my youth it was easier to tell white-haired auld biddies needing a seat but tougher these days. I panicked between offering my seat and potentially offending her, and not offering her a seat when she was in need. I ended up avoiding the issue and the potential social embarrassment entirely by getting up and off the train, giving her my seat, and taking the next train.

   I can’t understand how people can be asked for a seat, refuse, and are able to cope with the shame.

3. Anecdotally I’ve noticed an uptick of selfish behaviour since the pandemic. Not just in this context.

4. I got a “disability”, I put in quotation marks because I don’t like to think I have one. There are times I need a seat on the bus or train but I wont sit down if it’s any way busy because the glares I get off particularly older people for sitting in a disabled seat can be crazy. I’ve heard things like “a young healthy man like you”

   So I tough it out and stand no matter how bad it can be for me at times. I don’t see the average person changing how they view disabilities.

5. Not surprised unfortunately. I’ve gotten from the back seat to give a seat to someone pregnant and standing in wheelchair area because noone in the priority seats did. When I travel in rush hour the vibe just feels like get a seat and put headphones in asap by any means necessary.
   If I was disabled, I would be too anxious everyday to rely on others to help me, too unreliable. If I was able I would get one of those walking stick chairs if possible or portable stool. Not saying that’s what others should do, but I don’t think I could be patient enough to rely on the decency of others, knowing the trajectory of my day and mood could be down to the morning commute.
   Are we going to get to the point where there are flap seats on transport that are locked with a radar key or something 

6. Yep, people are arseholes.
   But also, often the commute is often the only space someone may have in their day between their job and their home. We all know both of those things come with responsibilities and pressures that can’t be avoided.

   I’m not excusing it, but we have no idea what else is going on in people’s lives for them to react in this way. It’s obviously not normal.

7. Today on the Waterloo & City line a pregnant lady got on. The two middle aged but perfectly physically capable men sitting in the priority seats pretended not to see her. When I offered her my seat further down the carriage, a lady blocked my way so I couldn’t easily make space for the pregnant lady – I can only imagine that she was targeting said seat.

   My wife used to keep a list of the number of times she was offered a seat when she was pregnant (taking the bus to work). It got a bit depressing when it was still at single figures by the end of the 9 months.

   People are a bit crappy. Some of them are lazy. Some of them are shy. Some of them genuinely don’t care.

8. Having a family member in a wheelchair really opens your eyes to how little people notice people with disabilities that can be physically seen let alone so I can only imagine how bad it is for them that can’t be seen.

9. I’ve got a chronic pain condition that sometimes makes it difficult to stand for extended periods and I find it’s just often easier to sit on the platform and wait for a less busy train so I have a better chance of getting a seat. The thing I hate the most is when (usually elderly) people roll their eyes or tut at me for not offering my seat. I don’t mind people asking if they can have my seat, they’re not to know I’m disabled and I can politely explain.

   I’m not always offered a seat but I don’t feel the need to be passive aggressive and rude to the people sitting down. Sure it’s very annoying to not be offered one, but I don’t know their personal circumstances and nothing is gained from being shitty to a stranger.

10. Not disability related but a shout out to the most amazing middle age men who were my absolute heroes and would always offer a seat to me when I was pregnant. I had so many flat no’s from young women I must admit I started wishing them weak pelvic floors.

11. I can never understand people’s mindset when they kick off after getting one of these badges shown to them… on a busy train… in an era where everyone has a video camera (phone) lol.

12. Tories, Farage and his ilk poisoned the very moral fabric of the nation for party and personal gain

13. The nation is filled with right-wing serf mentality snowflakes who don’t mind the boot on their necks as long as they can punch down on someone they think is beneath them.

14. Obviously there’s likely evidence to the contrary, but in the last 2 months I’ve been able to finally make journeys on the trains (one a necessity and the other was for work which I had the option to do online, but due to health improvements I wanted to go). In the 2 trips I made, I found the opposite. People could not be more polite and every train someone offered me their seat (one lady had a dog on her lap and I’ll be dammed if I’m gonna uproot a doggo from its comfort zone). I’ve also found people a lot more chatty and chilled.

    Again, that’s just my experience and I can’t speak for others.

15. I (wheelchair user) don’t use transport very often but on a whole I find people kind and helpful. If I’m sitting by a train waiting for staff, multiple people will stop and ask if I need them to go and fetch someone. Last time I used the tube a stranger helped my family bump me on and off and helped with luggage.

    I didn’t appreciate my last journey when there were 2 people in the wheelchair area so I was near the door. The train was crowded. Instead of waiting for people to get off, for some reason a woman decided to full on climb over me. I mean fully climb on my lap and straddle me. If there’s a perv out there, just get a wheelchair, this isn’t my first and won’t me the last time I get people climb over me and get boobs shoved in my face. I HATE it. Why people think they can use me like this. When the doors opened lots of people got off and space cleared around! Even if they didn’t, I’m sure people would have stepped off for a second to create space.

    Over all though I find people good.

16. Would it be odd if I asked people sitting in priority seats to give up their seat if I was traveling with someone disabled or pregnant?

    What’s the etiquette here? The article clearly also highlights disabilities which are not visible so I don’t want to ask someone who might have a disability that I cannot obviously see

    Edit: not sure why I am being down voted for genuinely asking what would be etiquette when I’m with a person who needs the seat? Should I ask the person sitting in priority seats to vacate?

17. My youngest child has several hidden disabilities but is terrified to use their ‘please offer me a seat’ card and badge because they have been treated so shittily because of their disabilities in general. They will only travel if I can travel with them due to previous experiences. It’s utterly shit and there are days when I find it really hard to remain calm when I see the way some people behave.

18. As someone with a walking stick and who uses a Please offer me a seat badge, I’m constantly amazed by the magical effect both have on fully grown adults in the priority seats who suddenly develop full on narcolepsy on public transport the moment they spot the badge.

    They look up, see the badge, then pretend to be asleep.

    It took me ages to even apply for one – why? pride, embarrassment, fear of judgement etc. And for the first year of using it, I used to hide the badge as soon as I was out of the station.

    Weirdly, in my experience, young people who are often accused of being selfish and out of touch have most definitely been the most responsive to the badge. The majority of them spot it and offer their seats automatically, whether they are in the priorty seating or not. It’s the adults that are the worst offenders and as a 50 yr woman, I’m embarrassed for their dedication to self service.

    Other disabled people will offer their seat to disabled and elderly people more often than able bodied adults. because they know how hard it is to manage standing on a moving bus/train and perceive the standing person as being even more in need of a seat. When this happens, the able bodied look at their phones, out of the window and pretend you don’t exist.

19. Just giving my anecdotal experience as someone who’s been both invisibly and visibly (as my condition has progressed) disabled, the public can be absolutely brutal on public transport.

    One experience pushed me to attempting suicide. I was on a bus where all non-priority seats on the lower deck were occupied, but all of the priority seats were empty. I took a priority seat towards the middle of the bus, leaving the seats closest to either door for anyone who may have more severe mobility impairments than me, since I was en route to a hospital.

    An old man got on and demanded that I get out of the “old people seats”. I told him that these seats are for anyone who has trouble standing and I showed him my crutch. All of the other priority seats were free, so I said that I didn’t understand why he wanted me to get up.

    He told the bus driver to tell me to get out of the “old people seats”, otherwise, he wouldn’t sit down and he wouldn’t allow the bus to move, in case he falls over. The bus driver decided to deal with this by telling me to get up and find another seat.

    I asked the other passengers if anyone could give me their non-priority seat. Silence. I asked again, stating that I can’t stand up, and that I’ll fall if the bus moves. I was told to fuck off and get off the bus so everyone could get on with it. The bus driver told me to leave so he could move the bus.

    I did. Straight into the path of a lorry. I ended up just being locked in a room in UCLH until gone midnight (this happened around 11a.m, so I was in there for around 12 hours) until they just handed me some leaflets for therapy I couldn’t afford and let me on my way. My GP was equally useless. Yes, it was selfish, I regret it, etc – but a suicidal person isn’t thinking rationally. Everyone in these threads thinks they’ll act perfectly in every situation when they’re sat behind their laptop, but I guarantee that you wouldn’t.

    I’ve been spat on, called a variety of slurs, and even punched, but this is the one that always sticks out to me because it was so needlessly cruel, so many people allowed it to happen, and there were so many easy solutions that didn’t involve my removal from the bus.

20. Last week I offered my seat to 3 older looking folks and each declined. Felt a weird sense of embarrassment after.

    Also are the badges the blue circular ones? If so I only recall ever seeing one in the last couple of years and a pregnant lady had it on.

21. This country’s utter hatred of the disabled disturbs and saddens me to no end.

22. Does this really surprise anyone? For decades the disabled have been framed as spongers or demanding of “more right that us normal folk”.

23. Not sure how feasible this would be but it’d be great if there were some way to indicate that I’m happy to give up my seat no questions asked, such as pressing a button that lights up above my seat or something.

    That way I don’t have to attentively watch for every person who might possibly need a seat and make the awkward judgment call of offering it, and people who need a seat can ask for it without fearing being turned down.

    The obvious issues are installing these and resetting the light when someone new sits down.

24. Not to undersell what’s clearly a issue, but everyone who’s reacted angrily (like screaming no, threatening to throw you off a train etc) is just a mental cunt. They’re also going to inflict their prick behaviour on non-disabled people at some point throughout the day as well. And an article like this isn’t going to change that.

    I think it’s worth reminding people that some disabilities are invisible and asking old people not to jab at disabled teenagers with their walking sticks though

25. Having a pregnant partner a few years back really opened my eyes to the struggles of people needing a seat.

    The amount of times I’ve had to ask someone to give up their seat for her was insane, despite her being visibly pregnant with a ‘baby on-board’ badge. 

26. why are young fit healthy people with kids lumped in with the disabled

27. I am not going to read this, but is this another attempt from TfL to push the public to intervene instead of them?

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