Miriana Conte aims to serve for Malta at Eurovision final

11:38pm

A confession

I’ve never really bothered to find out how the voting works these days, so I need to go to a quick Google…

11:36

All smiles

11:33

And that’s that.

That’s all 26 songs. Which are your favourites? Here are my top 10:

Estonia
Spain
Ukraine
Austria
Iceland
Germany
Malta
Switzerland
Denmark
Sweden

11:23pm

Albania  
Shkodra Elektronike – Zjerm 

Oi! Albania! Only Miriana is allowed to have a red costume and lighting. I don’t care if your flag is more red than ours. That’s our thing this year.  

I feel like if I asked ChatGPT to write a song that would be typical Eurovision entry of a Balkan country, this is what it would come up with… 

In fact… 

Song Title: “Vatra i Suze” (Fire and Tears) 

Artist: Marija Kovačević feat. Balkan Beats Orchestra 

Synopsis: 

A dramatic fusion of soaring Slavic vocals, turbo-folk rhythms, and dubstep drops. Marija sings of love lost during a summer storm on the Adriatic coast, as traditional strings duel with LED-lit dance breaks. Expect wind machines, barefoot stomping, and at least one defiant tear. 

Albania was the last act of the competition to perform with Shkodra Elektronike who performed “Zjerm”. Photo: AFP

11:19pm

San Marino 
Gabry Ponte – Tutta L’Italia 

Like Malta, fellow microstate San Marino had failed to qualify for the final since 2021. In fact this is only the fourth time they’ve managed to make it through.  

And did you know that Gabry Ponte is a member of Eiffel 65, of ‘I’m Blue’ fame? 

His song tonight is called Tutto L’Italia, which is presumably the answer to the question ‘What land are we going to conquer after centuries of being in the shadow of our larger neighbour?’  

This is the best song with Italian lyrics of the night, except maybe Estonia’s Espresso. 

Come at me, ragazzi. 

San Marino was represented by Gabry Ponte who performed “Tutta l’Italia”. Photo: AFP

11:16pm

France 
Louane – maman 

Does France know they don’t have to send a solo female songstress every time? 

Someone needs to tell the arena’s management that sand is leaking from the roof.  

Or as my colleague said: 

“France’s entry reminds me of a kid in Għadira that doesn’t want to leave, so they just roll around in the sand as the parents look on in exhaustion.” 

Her dad is going to be very angry when he picks her up in his car after the show.  

11:08pm

Sweden 
KAJ – Bara Bada Bastu 

Ah Sweden, the Real Madrid of Eurovision. With seven wins in total, they currently share the top of the competition’s leaderboard with Ireland, but could go top tonight if, as bookmakers predict, they triumph once again. 

The members of KAJ are actually Finnish, and the song is about the most Finnish of activities: alcoholism. 

Sorry, I mean sauna. 

To be honest I didn’t get the hype at first but I’ve slowly come around and have caught myself humming the chorus. These songs have a habit of burrowing their way into your brain. 

Sweden’s KAJ performing “Bara Bada Bastu”. Photo: AFP

11:05pm

Miriana gets Valletta crowd on their feet

The crowd in St George’s Square all stood up when Miriana appeared on the big screen. Video by Colin Backhouse

11:02pm

Denmark 
Sissal – Hallucination 

After Ireland’s completely unfair elimination on Thursday (who doesn’t want to listen to a song about a dead dog in space?!), this is the only Eurodance bop that remains in the competition. 

The chorus of this has been stuck in my head for the past few days. Well, to be precise, I’ve been singing, “Halloumi Nation!”.

Denmark’s Sissal performed “Hallucination”. Photo: AFP

10:58pm

Portugal 
NAPA – Deslocado 

Whoever set up this running order deserves a medal. We’ve jumped back and forth between mental and mellow all night.  

Portugal has really excelled at wistful, easy listening these past few years. They sound so content and at peace with themselves. 

I had to get the people I’m watching this with to slap me awake.

Portugal’s NAPA perform “Deslocado”. Photo: AFP

10:55pm

Graham who?

Apparently there’s some other guy called Graham Norton doing commentary. Never heard of him myself, but he did have nice things to say about Malta:

“Such a firm favourite. A wild ride. And she gives everything. It might play better in the hall than at home. I love this.”

10:54pm

Malta 
Miriana Conte – SERVING 

I’m going to pull up a chair, sit backwards on it and be honest with you for a moment. I didn’t like this song when I first heard it.  

But you know what? It’s so refreshing that we’re one of the ‘WTF’ entries this year. And unlike our recent attempts, people will actually remember this song in a year’s time. I’ve also liked the way she’s responded to the haters. 

So yeah, GO MIRIANA. 

You could just about hear people singing ‘Kant’ this time too.

Malta’s very own Miriana Conte “Serving” a powerful performance. Photo: AFP

10:49pm

Switzerland 
Zoë Më – Voyage 

Speaking of favourites, this is actually one of my favourites this year. She’s like a Swiss Billie Eilish.  

It’s just a shame she isn’t Hungarian (speaking of which, where is Hungary?), otherwise I would’ve called her Billie Goulash. Alas… 

10:44pm

Armenia 
PARG – SURVIVOR 

Armenia’s entry last year was my favourite, but this year’s foot-stomper is one of my least favourites. So it goes.  

PARG wants us all to know he’s a survivor. He’s like a river. He’s like a flower. A child of destiny, one might say.   

Armenia was represented by PARG who sang “Survivor”. Photo: AFP

10:41pm

Greece 
Klavdia – Asteromáta 

Maybe it’s the glasses but Klavdia is giving me newly qualified teacher vibes. Or ambitious young Labour MP who’s just been made parliamentary secretary for Vaguely Titled Thing We Don’t Actually Care About.  

Greece’s entry “Asteromata” performed by Klavdia. Photo: AFP

10:37pm

More good luck messages

Opposition Leader Bernard Grech also sent his best wishes to Miriana. “I am certain that, whatever the result, you will make us proud”. 

22:32pm

Germany 
Abor & Tynna – Baller 

My Tiktok feed has been completely blitzed by the song in recent weeks. I feel like they’ve been trying to brainwash me into voting for it, but luckily I’m immune to such tricks. 

In a completely unrelated note, it’s my absolute favourite song on the night. 

People (myself included) like to dunk on the UK for not giving Eurovision the importance it so greatly deserves, but did you know that it’s Germany that has placed last the most? Nine times to be precise.  

10:28pm

Poland 
Justyna Steczkowska – GAJA 

There’s always one country that channels Ruslana’s Wild Dances, and this year’s it’s Poland.  

Oh look, a dragon! And now the singer is in the air, just… hanging there. Presumably as a sacrifice to the dragon? I’m overthinking this. She should get Norway’s singer to rescue her (assuming he hasn’t accidentally set himself on fire). 

Poland was represented by Justyna Steczkowska who performed “Gaja”. Photo: AFP

10:24pm

Italy 
Lucio Corsi – Volevo Essere Un Duro 

Italy has opted to have its entry accompanied by English subtitles onscreen. I personally don’t need them because in preparation for this live blog, I learned every single European language.  

This song is the answer to the question: “What if Bob Dylan stole David Bowie’s clothes and started speaking Italian?” 

10:19pm

Finland 
Erika Vikman – ICH KOMME 

Mela sewwa, Miriana can’t sing the word ‘kant’, but Erika Vikman can sing ‘I’m coming’ while riding a giant microphone and wearing a studded leather leotard. Mhux fair!  

Finland’s Erika Vikman performing “Ich komme”. Photo: AFP

10:14pm

Netherlands 
Claude – C’est La Vie 

One of the more sober, grounded songs of the evening. 

Claude has opted to sing in French and English, which given how the Dutch language sounds, is unsurprising.  

Don’t hate me, Dutch people. You know it to be true in your hearts. Or as you would say, your heartschschs. 

Luckily for the Netherlands, this year their representative wasn’t booted out of the competition for the horrible crime of making an inappropriate gesture at an Israeli film crew that was allegedly harassing him. 

10:11pm

Latvia 
Tautumeitas – Bur Man Laimi 

Nice try, beautiful Northern European forest nymphs, but I’ve watched Midsommar and know exactly what you’re up to.   

At least I do this time, after I visited Riga last year and came back with only one kidney.  

Fun fact: The members of Tautumeitas are big animal lovers, and between the six of them, they own 150 sheep.

10:05pm

Iceland 
VÆB – RÓA 

What I love about this song is that it doesn’t faff about with an intro. Nope, straight into the fist-pumping chorus. 

If you find yourself thinking that you’ve heard this song a thousand times before, it’s because the song’s chord progression is one of the most common in pop music.  

And you know what? It works. 

Iceland’s duo VÆB performing “RÓA”. Photo: AFP

10:02pm

Austria 
JJ – Wasted Love 

Sad boy alert! Not just any sad boy – a sad boy with a soaring falsetto voice.   

Seriously though, the song might not be my cup of tea, but it is impressive how high his voice goes. In fact bookmakers have this down as one of the favourites.  

9:56pm

United Kingdom 
Remember Monday – What The Hell Just Happened? 

Like most years – with the notable exception of the affable Sam Ryder in 2022 – the UK has really taken advantage of that automatic qualification because they have yet again sent, in this author’s humble and unquestionable opinion, another flop. They’re dressed as Disney princesses trying to channel Queen but have ended up with Prince Andrew.  

What the hell just happened, indeed. 

UK was represented by Remember Monday who sang “What the hell just happened?” Photo: AFP

9:52pm

Fans zoned in

The fan zone in Valletta is packed out. Photo by Colin Blackhouse.

The crowd at the Eurovision fan zone in St George’s Square.

21:47

Ukraine 
Ziferblat – Bird of Pray 

I’m not sure if it’s the lighting, the costumes or the style of the song, but Ukraine’s entry looks like archive footage from the 1960s. Have Ukrainian scientists invented a time machine? If they have, they should probably go back to 1994 and not give up their nuclear weapons in exchange for security guarantees. 

Ukraine’s Ziferblat singing “Bird of Pray” (no, that’s not a spelling mistake). Photo: AFP

9:43pm

Spain 
Melody – ESA DIVA 

Is it me or does Spain send the same song every year? It certainly feels like the words ‘bailar’ and ‘caliente’ are always in there. It’s like how after my dad’s birthday I always sneakily take the card back and give it to him again the following year because I’m like, “Well it’s not like he’ll notice.”  

Sorry dad. 

9:39pm

Lithuania 
Katarsis – Tavo Akys 

Apperently these guys are big in their home country. I guess there’s a reason why Lithuania isn’t known worldwide for its music. 

What with the way he had his hand on his stomach the whole time, I thought we were going to be in for a dramatic costume change, where he’d reveal he was wearing a corset. Sadly (or thankfully) that wasn’t the case. 

9:37pm

A Prime Ministerial message

Prime Minister Robert Abela had a voice call with Miriana while attending a summit in Tirana yesterday

9:33pm

Israel 
Yuval Raphael – New Day Will Rise 

Please excuse me, I need to go take a quick bathroom break. I should’ve gone before the show started but when you gotta go, you gotta go. Be right back.

9:30

Estonia 
Tommy Cash – Espresso Macchiato 

Next up is Italy. No, wait, it’s Estonia’s Tommy Cash singing about espresso and “sweating like a mafioso.” 

I’m not sure if this is a love letter to Italian culture or a p*ss take. Maybe both? 

Anyway, I’m sure the Italians won’t react badly to it at all… 

I was surprised that this qualified for the final, as I thought Tommy’s performance on Tuesday’s night was less espresso and more flat white. And my view hasn’t changed. The recorded version is better. 

Estonia’s Tommy Cash performing “Espresso Macchiato”. Photo: AFP

9:26pm

Luxembourg 
Laura Thorn – La Poupée Monte Le Son  

Apparently this song is a nod to Luxembourg’s winning entry from 1965, but with a contemporary twist, as unlike the doll in that song, Laura won’t let herself be controlled.  

Luxembourg is the smallest country to have ever won Eurovision. For now, at least… 

Luxembourg was represented by Laura Thorn who sang “La Poupée Monte Le Son”. Photo: AFP

9:22pm

Norway 
Kyle Alessandro – Lighter 

Norway kicks things off. The only way I can describe this is reggaeton in the Game of Thrones universe.  

“I’ll be my own lighter,” Kyle Alessandro sings. I’m sure every smoker would love to be their own lighter, so they would never have to ask for one again. 

Fire, a guy in armour and a dancer travelling across the stage via acrobatics. We’re off to a very Eurovision-y start.  

21:17

Destiny calls

Malta’s last finalist sends a message of luck to our current finalist.

Destiny told Miriana she had “the strength, the talent and the heart to conquer anything.”

9:14pm

Meet the presenters

Our hosts for this evening are comedian Hazel Brugger, presenter and former model Michelle Hunziker and presenter and singer Sandra Studer.

I’ve enjoyed Brugger’s deadpan humour so far, which is not something you can say often about Eurovision hosts. 

9:12pm

Participants procession

Do they do this procession every year? It’s reminding me of the Olympics.

Miriana Conte proudly parading with the Maltese flag. Photo: AFP

9:04pm

And we’re off

We kick off with a performance by last year’s winner, Nemo.

8:57pm

Good things are served to those who wait

Even though we’ll have to wait a while for Miriana to take the stage, given that she’s performing 20th, the fact that she will feature towards the end of the show might be to her advantage.

Eurovision experts speculate that performing towards the end means audiences will remember you better.

The last time Malta performed 20th was in 2002, when a certain Ira Losco came second.

8:53pm

Maltese fans in Basel

An estimated 160 million people across Europe and beyond are expected to tune in on their TVs tonight.

Meanwhile, plenty of Maltese Eurovision fans are in Basel. Here’s marathon runner Clare Mifsud.

Maltese Eurovision fans gather in Basel.

8:30pm

Guten Abend

Good evening and welcome to yet another Eurovision live blog with me Matthew Bonanno, Eurovision expert (or so I’ve led my editors to believe).

We’ve a while to wait before Miriana takes to the stage at the St Jakobshalle tonight, as she’s performing 20th. Until then we’ll be updating you on everything that goes on throughout the night, so make sure to regularly refresh the page for the latest entries.