I keep meaning to start smoking 100 cigarettes a day, have a Costa coffee every morning, and subscribe to all the Sports Channels, Netflix, Prime etc.
Then when I give them all up I will be absolutely loaded!
Became a thief
Damn my guy owned 12 Netflix accounts and ordered 98 coffees a day… Either that or he was well off in the first place and bought that with daddy’s card
They’re talking about that round steel thing on their keys
Grandma died
Nice Keyring, think I picked up something similar back in ‘18 hell of purchase.
I got Claude to calculate some useful data here.
**Key figures:**
* Average first-time buyer house price (2024): £311,034
* Typical deposit required: 20% = £61,090
* Netflix subscription: £5.99/month (basic with ads) to £12.99/month (standard no ads)
* Takeaway coffee: approximately £2.75 to £4.40 per drink
**Monthly savings:**
* Netflix: £5.99 to £12.99
* Daily coffee (30 days): £82.50 to £132 (using £2.75-£4.40 range)
* **Total monthly savings: £88.49 to £144.99**
**Time to save £61,090:**
* At minimum savings (£88.49/month): **690 months = 57.5 years**
* At maximum savings (£144.99/month): **421 months = 35.1 years**
If only he’d given up the avocado on toast too, then he’d be up there with Bezos and Musk
Hate this crap.
So you cancelled Netflix & stopped getting takeaway coffee 6 months ago, huh?
So how did your additional, I dunno, let’s be generous, £500? How did that net you a house?
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
12 comments
Got my own keys to my mums house.
This is satire
I keep meaning to start smoking 100 cigarettes a day, have a Costa coffee every morning, and subscribe to all the Sports Channels, Netflix, Prime etc.
Then when I give them all up I will be absolutely loaded!
Became a thief
Damn my guy owned 12 Netflix accounts and ordered 98 coffees a day… Either that or he was well off in the first place and bought that with daddy’s card
They’re talking about that round steel thing on their keys
Grandma died
Nice Keyring, think I picked up something similar back in ‘18 hell of purchase.
I got Claude to calculate some useful data here.
**Key figures:**
* Average first-time buyer house price (2024): £311,034
* Typical deposit required: 20% = £61,090
* Netflix subscription: £5.99/month (basic with ads) to £12.99/month (standard no ads)
* Takeaway coffee: approximately £2.75 to £4.40 per drink
**Monthly savings:**
* Netflix: £5.99 to £12.99
* Daily coffee (30 days): £82.50 to £132 (using £2.75-£4.40 range)
* **Total monthly savings: £88.49 to £144.99**
**Time to save £61,090:**
* At minimum savings (£88.49/month): **690 months = 57.5 years**
* At maximum savings (£144.99/month): **421 months = 35.1 years**
If only he’d given up the avocado on toast too, then he’d be up there with Bezos and Musk
Hate this crap.
So you cancelled Netflix & stopped getting takeaway coffee 6 months ago, huh?
So how did your additional, I dunno, let’s be generous, £500? How did that net you a house?
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
<waits for “parents gave me £40k”>
He’s the key man
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