Norwegian director Nina Knag exposes dirty secrets in “Don’t Call Me Mama,” premiering at Karlovy Vary Film Festival.
“I was doing research for another project about immigration in Norway, and I came across this article about Norwegian women volunteering at asylum centers. It was revealed that some of them were having sexual relationships with young Syrian men. I was shocked by this power imbalance,” she reveals.
“At first, I judged them. I pitied them, too. And then I put myself in their shoes. When you’re in your late 40s, your marriage is stagnant and your children have just moved out, you don’t feel seen. And then this young person makes you feel alive once again.”
In “Don’t Call Me Mama,” well-liked teacher Eva (Pia Tjelta) is struggling. Her husband, the local mayor, has betrayed and humiliated her, but she still tries to support his campaign. Their child has moved out, their sex life is dead. When she meets 18-year-old refugee Amir, she wants to help him. Then she just wants him.
“He awakens her sexuality,” says Knag.
“At a certain point in a marriage, you forget about intimacy, you’re busy with kids and the passion is gone. Eva used to love her husband. She still does, I think – they just lost their connection. Amir lights a fire in her, but it makes you wonder: Are they just using him to find that spark again?”
Embarking on an affair, Eva – who’s always followed the rules – has a lot to lose: her position, respect in the community, friends and even her philandering husband. But not as much as Amir, who’s fighting for his future.
“For him, it’s a question of life and death. He’s attracted to her, but all these feelings and longings are mixed with privilege. She has power over him, that’s undeniable, and she’s not really thinking about it,” explains Knag.
“A mature woman and a much younger man – we’ve seen that before. But it was the political part of it all that really shocked me. He’s 18: it’s not illegal. But he’s vulnerable, because he doesn’t have anyone else in this country. And the only person who wants to help can also destroy him.”
As Amir moves in with Eva and her husband, who at first sees it as a political opportunity, things get out of hand rather quickly.
“In Norway, we’re very idealistic. We want to help – as long as it’s on our terms, which could be said for so many Western countries. When Amir threatens to ruin the façade of their marriage, he stops being important. It’s uncomfortable, and hypocritical, but people do things like that,” notes Knag.
Some potential actors found the story “too controversial,” she admits.
“They would say: ‘I can’t see myself play a character who has this kind of relationship.’ They were also afraid of intimate scenes – but not Pia. She wanted to push her boundaries. She said that’s why she became an actor.”
In the film, Tjelta’s joined by Tarek Zayat as Amir and Kristoffer Joner, the latter known also outside of Norway thanks to roles in “The Revenant” and “Mission Impossible – Fallout.”
Despite its tricky subject matter, audience-oriented Knag didn’t want to make a “repulsive” film. She also took her time exploring her characters’ murky motivations.
“Listen – I graduated from film school in 2010. Now, 15 years later, I finally made my feature debut. It’s been a long journey, and I am 41 years old now. I feel ready,” she laughs.
“I want people to find it exciting, emotional, shocking, even a little funny. I hope they’ll fall in love with Eva, and only then I’ll try to sneak in some uncomfortable truths. Not thinking about the consequences of your choices… That’s so human.”
She notes: “We immediately understand something is broken in her, and that makes her decisions a bit easier to understand. It was so important to make her someone me and my friends could relate to. Because when she finally crosses that line, it surprises you even more.”
“It could happen to anyone.”
Produced by Eleonore Anselme and Ingrid Skagestad for The Global Ensemble Drama, “Don’t Call Me Mama” is co-produced by Screen Story and Mediefondet Zefyr. It is sold by REinvent Studios.