There are so many other stories that could be told of women who have no choice, who either cannot afford childcare or are among the many layoffs that disproportionately impact women. This was not one of those stories.
KK: When I started researching the issue of women in business back in 2008, I remember coming across a study showing that in some fields more professional women were leaving the workforce than there were joining it for the first time in American history. When I read your piece, part of me kind of thought, “Here we go again.”
Do your findings just suggest that, however long it takes, society can’t get this right? I hate the phrase “work life balance”, but that we just can’t figure out how to allow professional women to work and have children at the same time in a way that is satisfying and harmonious for everybody?
IL: I think there’s absolutely something to that, but for a lot of these women, it wasn’t that they felt they couldn’t make it work. I spoke with one woman who said, “If there is such a thing as having it all, I had it.” I spoke with another woman who had the means to hire nannies, and people would say, “Just get another nanny,” and it will always stick with me that she said, “I don’t want another nanny. I want my moments.”
There is no work-life balance that is going to give you all of your time with your kids, if that’s what you want. And some of these women in my story are not mothers. They were leaving the workforce for other priorities.