It’s not about saying yes to every shiny opportunity. Sometimes, the real power lies in what – or rather who – you turn down. And few know that better than Elon Musk.

The hidden power behind a simple word

Ten years ago, Justine Musk – author, mother of six, and once married to one of the world’s most talked-about billionaires – offered a rare insight into what makes Elon Musk tick. In a TEDx talk that’s just as relevant today, she shared a lesson that shaped both her own life and her understanding of success: the art of saying no.

“I was married,” she said pointedly, “to a man who became very successful. And as I watched him rise, I noticed two things. He worked incredibly hard – harder than most. And he said no. A lot.”

That simple, two-letter word, she explained, was one of Musk’s greatest tools. He used it to protect his time, safeguard his energy, and focus his efforts. He didn’t just say no to random requests – he said no to distractions, to noise, to anything that might pull him away from his larger vision.

Behind every no, she suggested, lies a deeper yes – a commitment to something meaningful.

Boundaries aren’t barriers, they’re clarity

For Justine, this realisation didn’t just paint a clearer picture of her ex-husband’s success – it transformed her own sense of self. As a mother and novelist, she came to see “no” not as a rejection, but as a declaration of priorities.

She spoke of how many of us lose our ability to say no early on. Children do it naturally, but somewhere between school rules and societal expectations, that instinct gets chipped away. By the time we’re adults, the pressure to please, perform, and participate often overshadows our inner compass.

But for her, reclaiming that ability became a turning point. Saying no wasn’t about being difficult – it was about carving out the space needed to create, to think, and to dream.

Her words echoed another icon of innovation. Back in 1997, Steve Jobs famously said: “Focusing is about saying no.” It’s a philosophy shared by the world’s most driven minds – not just a preference, but a survival tactic in an age of relentless demands.

The yes behind every no

In a world fuelled by hustle culture and endless invitations, it’s easy to confuse busyness with purpose. But as Justine put it, your deep yes is your right to dream. Every decision to turn something down is also a decision to pour more energy into what truly matters.

And that doesn’t just apply to entrepreneurs and tech tycoons. It’s something anyone juggling work, family, or creative ambitions can take to heart. Setting clear boundaries, saying no without guilt, and choosing your yes with intention — these are the quiet habits that build lasting success.

So next time you feel stretched thin or pulled in too many directions, consider the Elon approach. Not because you’re aiming for Mars, necessarily, but because you’re trying to live a life that’s more aligned with what matters most to you.

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