They take 6 months to get from Russia? That no fly zone is brutal.
It’s like every day they “warn” and/or “threat” something..
> The Sarmat is capable of carrying 10 or more nuclear warheads and decoys, and of striking targets thousands of miles away in the United States or Europe.
*’Yo Putin, I heard you like Nukes so we put 10 Nukes into one missile to make a super nuke!’*
One of Putin’s guards: *’Oppenheimer’s destroyer of worlds speech wasn’t meant to be inspiration’*
Oh no, not like they can already hit the UK.
What a waste of military expenditure, if you spent a bit more on logistics maybe you could have won the war you are fighting.
Given they already have nuclear weapons capable of hitting the UK this doesn’t really change much.
Soooo…they’ll finally have Minuteman III MIRV tech in late 2022.
For anyone else initially concerned, as I was, remember the word “deploy” and “capable” –
As others have said, Russia have had nukes capable of this for *decades* and this latest announcement is almost certainly two things –
1. Admitting their current arsenal isn’t up to scratch. I’ve seen various anecdotal reports from defectors/whistle-blowers that their current nukes are very badly maintained, to the point most of the fissile material hasn’t been swapped out since the Cold War, so they’d be unlikely to work. This is just them using the current crisis to say they’re going to finally update them, something another commenter pointed out they’ve been saying for years anyway.
2. A reminder to the West not to get trigger happy ourselves. Note that contrary to what some say, Putin isn’t *insane* – a danger, most likely a war criminal, and fearful his military’s weaknesses have been seriously exposed to the world. He’s been walking around for 20 years with a massive bulge in his pants and we’ve all been saying “damn, that guy’s packing, we couldn’t compete with that if it came to it” and now he’s snagged his pants on a Ukrainian twig, they’ve fallen down, and it turns out he’s got a micropenis. Clumsy analogy, but you get the point. The West now knows a relatively small non-NATO nation can destroy most of the Russian army. Not wanting to defend Putin here, but you can fully understand why he’s waving the “but still don’t try anything because remember, we have nukes!” flag. If it wasn’t for his nukes, NATO could give a quick “psst, join up with us and we’ll keep trading openly with you, and wink wink, *might* turn a blind eye if you invade Taiwan in a relatively peaceful manner” to China, and between them capture all of Russia from both sides in a few hours on a Tuesday afternoon.
Also bear in mind reporting from the Indy is tabloid level trash, and also remember who owns the Indy…
Given that a nuclear attack would result in immediate retaliation it’s just an empty threat. We’ve seen that their armed forces are badly supplied and organised. We should just tell Putin to fuck off.
What happened to Satan 1? I don’t want to be obliterated by someone’s second try.
“Have you noticed that we’ve called our missiles Satan?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Yuri, are we the baddies?”
That’s ok, UK just built a missile to destroy a Satan 2 before it reaches the border of Russia. It’s called a NATO RESPONSE.
Oh no, not some missiles that they would never dare fire at us because we can nuke them right back
If its like the rest of the russian equipment, it’ll self destruct just after it leaves the tube or the tractor unit will breakdown…
Oh shut up Russia.
There is no way anyone will launch anything, because once the first missile is launched its over and no one will want to “rule” over what’s left, which will be nothing.
So they are just used as a threat.
Why would they want to do that? What gain does anyone possibly get from that, if they want to stop the sanctions. Stop killing people in Ukraine, I guess logic isnt Putlers strong suit
Maybe someone should inform Putin that the UKs Trident is also capable of deploying multiple warheads & it can be delivered to Russia by lunch time, and it won’t have the most capable militaries in the world trying to intercept it.
Nothing to it really, given they have nuclear weapons pointed at us right now, this is just an update on Satan 1.
By Autumn, Russia will be so broke it could not afford the fuel for that thing …
I feel like this is turning into one of those daily calendars that you hang up in the toilet, except this one has the same joke on every page.
**Russia**: “You guys know what a Dire Nuke is, right? They’re like regular nukes, but dire.”
Unless the corrupt oligarchs of Russia haven’t just stolen the money and told Putin they have design a nuke, when it’s just a metal tube saying “Satan II” on it.
Is Vlad trying to compete with Boris in the lying stakes?
But Putin won’t because he knows that if he did it, it would result in nuclear war. We’ll be fucked but the US, the EU wouldn’t take kindly to seeing nukes launched at an ally and a nato member.
That and if Russia wanted to wipe us out, it could do so at any given time. Either way, we’re fucked in a nuclear war.
Let’s just say he does set a missile off, NATO and it’s countries have said they have the technology to pretty much shoot a nuclear missile before it reaches its destination.
In that case where would they shoot it? There is obviously going to be some sort of nuclear debris regardless so you would want to do it as close to the initial launch point.
So would that be over Russia or would it be over an ocean. Just something I was thinking about.
Oh noes. There was me thinking they could only hit USA, a country much further away from the UK.
Lol Russia didn’t say they would deploy missiles capable of hitting UK.
Russia said they would deploy missiles.
The media said they’re capable of hitting the UK
After seeing their shit show performance in Ukraine from the apparent “2nd best” military of the world I’ll not start prepping just yet.
Last week Ukranian forces uncovered a large stash of wrapped TNT and plastic explosives when they took over an abandoned Russian post.
Problem is, corruption is so widespread and deep in Russia the explosives had been replaced with blocks of wood. Russia is so corrupt they have polystyrene fighter jets on runways (for the satellite deceptions.
Russia is threatening with this weapon because it’s probably the only thing in their entire military machine that works properly (for the moment)
I just hoping we get the 3 min warning shit for a nuclear strike, I’m getting naked and standing in my street. I dont want to be around for what’s left.
Imagine missiles did take that long…honey we got 4 months left to move
They’re well aware that US/UK have hidden submarines capable of obliterating much of Russia. No one will send nukes, as it’s equivalent to a big red button to nuke yourself
I understand that modern ICMBS like Trident and Satan are capable of hitting anywhere in the world.
*checks notes* yes UK is confirmed to be a part of the world. Conclusion: headline likely to be accurate
Well if it’s going to take then until autumn to do it then it shows the poor state that their military is in, given for the last 50 odd years the world already believed thay had the capability.
Taking a shot every time Russia threatens another country only to die of alcohol poisoning within a month
Why would they threaten destruction of their own real estate?
This is just posturing because British weapons are so effective in Ukraine. The war has wiped out a huge amount of Russian strength in just a couple of months, by autumn they will be a failed state.
Well, atleast it won’t mess with Summer pub gardens.
It just means i won’t have to pay back the huge loan that i’m going to have to take out to afford anything. Thanks Putin!
Edit: Damn, he’s not going to use them. Just deploy them. Disappointing.
I’d rather they didn’t, I’m moving house in the summer so I won’t be used to the new house
Russia won’t be able to afford paper airplanes by then so I don’t think anyone needs to be concerned.
41 comments
>capable of hitting UK by the autumn
They take 6 months to get from Russia? That no fly zone is brutal.
It’s like every day they “warn” and/or “threat” something..
> The Sarmat is capable of carrying 10 or more nuclear warheads and decoys, and of striking targets thousands of miles away in the United States or Europe.
*’Yo Putin, I heard you like Nukes so we put 10 Nukes into one missile to make a super nuke!’*
One of Putin’s guards: *’Oppenheimer’s destroyer of worlds speech wasn’t meant to be inspiration’*
Oh no, not like they can already hit the UK.
What a waste of military expenditure, if you spent a bit more on logistics maybe you could have won the war you are fighting.
Given they already have nuclear weapons capable of hitting the UK this doesn’t really change much.
Soooo…they’ll finally have Minuteman III MIRV tech in late 2022.
Good deal.
I mean, the west has [has the technology since 1968](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGM-30_Minuteman), and Russia have been threatening to deploy [Satan 2 since 2009](https://www.businessinsider.com/how-satan-2-icbm-nuclear-weapon-works-2018-3).
[deleted]
For anyone else initially concerned, as I was, remember the word “deploy” and “capable” –
As others have said, Russia have had nukes capable of this for *decades* and this latest announcement is almost certainly two things –
1. Admitting their current arsenal isn’t up to scratch. I’ve seen various anecdotal reports from defectors/whistle-blowers that their current nukes are very badly maintained, to the point most of the fissile material hasn’t been swapped out since the Cold War, so they’d be unlikely to work. This is just them using the current crisis to say they’re going to finally update them, something another commenter pointed out they’ve been saying for years anyway.
2. A reminder to the West not to get trigger happy ourselves. Note that contrary to what some say, Putin isn’t *insane* – a danger, most likely a war criminal, and fearful his military’s weaknesses have been seriously exposed to the world. He’s been walking around for 20 years with a massive bulge in his pants and we’ve all been saying “damn, that guy’s packing, we couldn’t compete with that if it came to it” and now he’s snagged his pants on a Ukrainian twig, they’ve fallen down, and it turns out he’s got a micropenis. Clumsy analogy, but you get the point. The West now knows a relatively small non-NATO nation can destroy most of the Russian army. Not wanting to defend Putin here, but you can fully understand why he’s waving the “but still don’t try anything because remember, we have nukes!” flag. If it wasn’t for his nukes, NATO could give a quick “psst, join up with us and we’ll keep trading openly with you, and wink wink, *might* turn a blind eye if you invade Taiwan in a relatively peaceful manner” to China, and between them capture all of Russia from both sides in a few hours on a Tuesday afternoon.
Also bear in mind reporting from the Indy is tabloid level trash, and also remember who owns the Indy…
Given that a nuclear attack would result in immediate retaliation it’s just an empty threat. We’ve seen that their armed forces are badly supplied and organised. We should just tell Putin to fuck off.
What happened to Satan 1? I don’t want to be obliterated by someone’s second try.
“Have you noticed that we’ve called our missiles Satan?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Yuri, are we the baddies?”
That’s ok, UK just built a missile to destroy a Satan 2 before it reaches the border of Russia. It’s called a NATO RESPONSE.
Oh no, not some missiles that they would never dare fire at us because we can nuke them right back
If its like the rest of the russian equipment, it’ll self destruct just after it leaves the tube or the tractor unit will breakdown…
Oh shut up Russia.
There is no way anyone will launch anything, because once the first missile is launched its over and no one will want to “rule” over what’s left, which will be nothing.
So they are just used as a threat.
Why would they want to do that? What gain does anyone possibly get from that, if they want to stop the sanctions. Stop killing people in Ukraine, I guess logic isnt Putlers strong suit
Maybe someone should inform Putin that the UKs Trident is also capable of deploying multiple warheads & it can be delivered to Russia by lunch time, and it won’t have the most capable militaries in the world trying to intercept it.
Nothing to it really, given they have nuclear weapons pointed at us right now, this is just an update on Satan 1.
By Autumn, Russia will be so broke it could not afford the fuel for that thing …
I feel like this is turning into one of those daily calendars that you hang up in the toilet, except this one has the same joke on every page.
**Russia**: “You guys know what a Dire Nuke is, right? They’re like regular nukes, but dire.”
Unless the corrupt oligarchs of Russia haven’t just stolen the money and told Putin they have design a nuke, when it’s just a metal tube saying “Satan II” on it.
Is Vlad trying to compete with Boris in the lying stakes?
Can’t help but think this:
https://tenor.com/view/youre-hard-david-brent-ricky-gervais-gif-11907187
But Putin won’t because he knows that if he did it, it would result in nuclear war. We’ll be fucked but the US, the EU wouldn’t take kindly to seeing nukes launched at an ally and a nato member.
That and if Russia wanted to wipe us out, it could do so at any given time. Either way, we’re fucked in a nuclear war.
Let’s just say he does set a missile off, NATO and it’s countries have said they have the technology to pretty much shoot a nuclear missile before it reaches its destination.
In that case where would they shoot it? There is obviously going to be some sort of nuclear debris regardless so you would want to do it as close to the initial launch point.
So would that be over Russia or would it be over an ocean. Just something I was thinking about.
Oh noes. There was me thinking they could only hit USA, a country much further away from the UK.
Lol Russia didn’t say they would deploy missiles capable of hitting UK.
Russia said they would deploy missiles.
The media said they’re capable of hitting the UK
After seeing their shit show performance in Ukraine from the apparent “2nd best” military of the world I’ll not start prepping just yet.
Last week Ukranian forces uncovered a large stash of wrapped TNT and plastic explosives when they took over an abandoned Russian post.
Problem is, corruption is so widespread and deep in Russia the explosives had been replaced with blocks of wood. Russia is so corrupt they have polystyrene fighter jets on runways (for the satellite deceptions.
Russia is threatening with this weapon because it’s probably the only thing in their entire military machine that works properly (for the moment)
I just hoping we get the 3 min warning shit for a nuclear strike, I’m getting naked and standing in my street. I dont want to be around for what’s left.
Imagine missiles did take that long…honey we got 4 months left to move
They’re well aware that US/UK have hidden submarines capable of obliterating much of Russia. No one will send nukes, as it’s equivalent to a big red button to nuke yourself
I understand that modern ICMBS like Trident and Satan are capable of hitting anywhere in the world.
*checks notes* yes UK is confirmed to be a part of the world. Conclusion: headline likely to be accurate
Well if it’s going to take then until autumn to do it then it shows the poor state that their military is in, given for the last 50 odd years the world already believed thay had the capability.
Taking a shot every time Russia threatens another country only to die of alcohol poisoning within a month
Why would they threaten destruction of their own real estate?
This is just posturing because British weapons are so effective in Ukraine. The war has wiped out a huge amount of Russian strength in just a couple of months, by autumn they will be a failed state.
Well, atleast it won’t mess with Summer pub gardens.
It just means i won’t have to pay back the huge loan that i’m going to have to take out to afford anything. Thanks Putin!
Edit: Damn, he’s not going to use them. Just deploy them. Disappointing.
I’d rather they didn’t, I’m moving house in the summer so I won’t be used to the new house
Russia won’t be able to afford paper airplanes by then so I don’t think anyone needs to be concerned.