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38th over: Australia 200-3 (Smith 14, Green 4) Cam Green is Australia’s new No5. That was well bowled by Stokes – close to the length Jason Gillespie spoke about a moment ago, with a soupçon of away movement to find the edge.
You’d imagine Stokes will settle into a marathon spell at this end, especially if he can get the ball moving under lights. I think he fancies Green too, having set him up beautifully in the first innings at Perth. Green punches a handsome drive that is very well stopped at mid-off by Archer. But he gets off the mark next ball, tucking an errant delivery to the fine leg boundary. England have been spitting out four-balls today.
ShareWICKET! Australia 196-3 (Labuschagne c Smith b Stokes 65)
Eeeeeesh, how England needed that. Labuschagne tries to force a good ball from Stokes and gets the thinnest of edges that is well caught by the tumbling Smith. The end of a terrific, quietly forceful innings from Labuschagne, whose 65 came from only 78 balls.
Josh Hazlewood is a doubt for the rest of the series after suffering another setback. At this rate, Australia will be able to play him as a specialist batter for the last two Tests.
37th over: Australia 196-2 (Labuschagne 65, Smith 14) Last winter I stayed up into the small hours and watched Brydon Carse bowl like a dream against New Zealand. He was forensic, intimidating, insistent, and he looked like a banker for this series. Alas, today he is bowling pure, unadulterated filth – and not the good kind.
The first ball of his eighth over is short on leg stump, and you’ll never guess what Labuschagne does with it?!?! You betcha: a pull round the corner for four more. Tihs is another reason England needed five bowlers, as insurance for somebody having an off day. Two sides to every story, though, and Labuschagne in particular is playing with clarity and ruthlessness. Smith cuts for three to bring up the fifty partnership.
Even Jason Gillespie, one of the most empathic, gentle and polite people in cricket, is going off on one in the commentary box about the performance of attacks in this game. “At Perth and Brisbane,” he says, “you want to bowl as short as you can while still getting the batsmen to come forward. In the modern game I’m seeing a lot of impatience.”
36th over: Australia 189-2 (Labuschagne 58, Smith 14) Stokes replaces Archer. His first ball is too short and pulled easily round the corner for four by Labuschagne. England picked the wrong attack – Matt Potts should have played, mainly to bowl to this pair – and have doubled down by bowling really poorly. But apart from that it’s been an unmitigated triumph.
In other news, this, from Chris Paraskevas, is an early contender for my favourite email of the 2025-26 Ashes.
G’day Rob. Hope you’re well! (I am properly pi$$ed.) Quintessential gorgeous Sydney day today peaking at around 35 degrees celcius in the arvo.
Had the Xmas work function off and the afternoon was shaping up to be an absomur3 disastwr when I realised I was the obly one hitting the turps (going at a strike rate of three drinks an hour) and then to top it off- The Old Fitzroy pub literally ran out of burgers (this is afrer I clweayrly saw thwir chef cooking 8 burgers when I accidentally walked into the kitchen lookingnfor the dunny).
Anyway long story ahort / sober: had to make do with fish and chips (doesn’tr really absorb the alcohol but that’s a grwat rhing upon reflection) At one point I averted complete catastrophe when the bartender came to remove my empty glass – only to realize I had the MBM and a stream of the game fired up and the phone rreasted against the glass.
Might hit the Bottle-O and keep the party going all night, this game is actually going to g0 past 2 dayz (m??+?!?!?!?!?).
How good is life inn Australia / the permanent shadow of the pub!?“PS. England bowlint …. bad.
Just say no, kids.
(Btw you can see Chris’s short film here. It’s not about his Christmas party.)
Updated at 02.58 EST
Fifty for Labuschagne
35th over: Australia 182-2 (Labuschagne 51, Smith 14) England’s Carse has taken a serious spanking, with 54 runs coming from his first six overs. Labuschagne gets four more with a top-edged pull over the keeper’s head – and those runs take him to a vital half-century from only 67 balls. He’s back.
Smith forces two more later in the over. Carse’s figures would look a bit grisly in an ODI, never mind a Test: 7-0-61-1.
Updated at 02.53 EST
Thanks Angus, hello everyone. We’re about to enter the twilight zone, and unless England have a very good second half of the day, the Ashes hopes of this team will never be seen again. The next few hours are positively Brobdingnagian.
As the sun sets on Brisbane, Jofra needs a spell and so do I. Time to hand the pink pill of the OBO to Rob Smyth and bid you all adieu. Enjoy the twilight zone, folks!
34th over: Australia 175-2 (Labuschagne 46, Smith 12) Archer continues and immediately draws an edge from Labuschagne’s dropping hands. It falls well short of the slips though. Third ball is slower and fades down leg-side where Marnus helps it along with a gentle caress that steers it past the fielder at fine leg for FOUR. I’m surprised Archer hasn’t been spelled here. he is clearly tiring and has shown signs of a side strain. Is Stokes taking unnecessary risks with his strike weapon? Or has he simply got nowehere else to turn?
An email from Stephen Holliday thinks “there’s something quite nostalgic about all this. An utterly toothless England with no ideas other than to huff and puff and get burnt foreheads, and an Ashes series over on the morning of the fourth day of play. It’s like before Trump. Before social media. Before the internet. Endless summers without a care in the world. Really happy days. I approve!”
33rd over: Australia 170-2 (Labuschagne 41, Smith 12) Change of bowling as Atkinson gives way to Carse… and Ben Stokes issues a snarl straight away as he’s forced to Atkinson’s stop skew off the boot and gifts Smith two runs from the misfield. Smudge takes another two from the fourth, a leg-side no-ball, and then drives FOUR through mid-on from the last as Carse continues to leak runs.
32nd over: Australia 161-2 (Labuschagne 41, Smith 4) Archer enters his 11th over, the most of any England’s bowlers and the most frugal too. He’s going for just 2.36 per over and has the wicket of Jake Weatherald to his name. Given their history, Smith and Labuschagne seem happy to wait Archer out and attack the change bowler. Will Stokes risk Carse again, despite him giving up nine an over? He’ll have to roll the dice because Archer looks done and Labuschagne lifts him for SIX over fine leg to prove it.
31st over: Australia 155-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 4) Australia’s run-rate has dropped to 5.11 since Weatherald’s exit and Atkinson is slowly turning the screws on Smith, delivering a maiden. Looks like Archer is going to keep this spell going. England are going for broke.
30th over: Australia 155-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 4) Breathe easy, England fans. Jofra Archer has resumed his spell and his first ball is 139kph, still a good clip. Smith lets it pass down leg-side but he pulls the second square and steals a run. Archer tosses down a 146kph bumper and Labuschagne ducks it, rising with an impish grin.
29th over: Australia 154-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 3) Footage on air now is showing Archer in consultation with the England physio on the boundary. He’s staying on but looks to be stretching out his flanks. Atkinson is still rolling at the other end, faster and tighter than in the first session. He draws an ugly flash from Labuschagne first ball that sends Marnus back into his shell for the rest. A maiden ensues.
28th over: Australia 154-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 3) Archer is still delivering at 140kph but seems to be tiring a little. Smith works an overpitched ball for three and then another full one gets lashed through the covers by Labuschagne. Seven from the over.
Steven Smith bats in the second session on day two. Photograph: Hollie Adams/ReutersShare
Updated at 02.22 EST
27th over: Australia 147-2 (Labuschagne 30, Smith 0) The Old Firm of Steve Smith and Marnus Labuschagne reunite following Jake Weatherald’s departure for an excellent 72. Smith sees off two deliveries from Atkinson, happy to watch awhile.
Updated at 02.14 EST
WICKET! Weatherald lbw Archer 72 (Australia 146-2)
Breakthrough! Great bowling by Jofra Archer. He got clouted for four last ball and sought revenge. He has nailed Jake Weatherald bang in front. No appeals to the third umpire by the batter. He knows he’s gone. And sure enough, replays show it hitting middle stump halfway up.
Jofra Archer celebrates dismissing Jake Weatherald. Photograph: Cameron Spencer/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 02.13 EST
26th over: Australia 141-1 (Weatherald 68, Labuschagne 29) Marnus steals a single and leaves Archer to Weatherald who is loving life as a Test cricketer. All the more now, as he crunches a late cut to the rope. Strewth, that was brutal. He took it off the third rib and it rocketed to the boundary. But Archer’s reply is a yorker and it’s got past the bat and thundered into the pads. Big shout!
25th over: Australia 141-1 (Weatherald 68, Labuschagne 29) Gus Atkinson’s girded loins continue to deliver tighter lines but minimal threat. He’s throwing them down at 137kph and angling it back in at the stumps. It’s all going well until Weatherald steps back and cuts like a knife behind point for FOUR.
Guy Hornsby doesn’t like what the new dawn has delivered in the UK but, like all stoic Poms, is looking on the bright side: “Well that’s a sobering score to wake up to Angus! But we’ve been here many times before. England bowled 2nd XI stuff in the first session, but you have to hope they’ll have had a bit of a talking to in the break. And looking at how they’re coming out so far, it seems to have worked. There’s a really long way to go and we have the lights to come, so we are still right in this, we just have to bring the stumps into play. And pray.”
24th over: Australia 137-1 (Weatherald 64, Labuschagne 29) As Archer rolls to the crease, Jake Weatherald begins mouthing mantras. Lip readers, please write in to tell me what he’s saying to himself. Or is he just pouting and pussing like Mick Jagger? Whatever he’s doing, it’s working and he’s having fun out there. He clips Archer for another single as Australia take their target under 200.
23rd over: Australia 133-1 (Weatherald 61, Labuschagne 28) Atkinson has been given a fresh spin. His first four overs went at almost six an over but he yields just a single to each batter here. Perhaps tea has girded his loins for the new session?
Darryl Accone is following from South Africa: “At lunch at the Gabbatoir, the best-laid plans of Bazzers and men lie in waste after Australia’s Baz-like start to their innings. It’s good to see cricketing intelligence whip cricketing inflexibility, to see respect for fundamentals trump the self-hypnotising mantras of a mindless cult.”
22nd over: Australia 131-1 (Weatherald 60, Labuschagne 27) Jofra Archer enters his sixth with 0-9: frugal figures but he’s paid to make breakthroughs. Weatherald works him for a single but Archer responds with a good line outside off to Labuschagne. Tight bowling but England need aggression from Archer.
Players are taking the field for the second session of this pink ball Test. Jofra Archer looks full of beans (perhaps, literally) and is pawing at the ground like a wolf watching a rabbit on the horizon. Mind you, so is Jake Weatherald. He has thumped 59 from 56 for his first Test half-century and looks hungry for more. Here we go…
With England reeling and Australia rolling, Stephen Smith is keeping calm rather than carrying on: “We’ve had a horribly traditional first innings 334 with a big score from the big man [the 183cm Joe Root] (his red inker and subsequent 70-odd average soothes me). And now top order runs in reply. Take away the run rate and this just has too much of a feel of an actual Test match. Where’s the flash where’s the pizzazz where’s the chutzpah? Hopefully Jamie Smith emerges after lunch with his hard cricket replaced by an e scooter helmet to get this all back off track.”
Tom Banks isn’t quite as hopeful and asks. “Too late to fly out Jimmy?”
Updated at 01.40 EST
Tea: Australia 130-1 (trailing England by 204 runs)
Advantage Australia.
The home side still trail by over 200-runs but on the evidence of that session they will reach and breach that target before the day is out. England may have edged day one and piled a few more runs onto an entertaining 10th-wicket partnership this morning, but they have dropped their bundle on day two through loose bowling, a dropped catch and abysmal body language.
As Brian Withington writes in from Blighty under the gloomy headline ‘Fill Your Boots’: “The generosity of most of our batters has been surpassed by the bowlers, with a smorgasbord of long hops spiced with the occasional half volley. Bon appetit!”
Joe Root’s unbeaten 138 was magnificent but Australia have erased it in a session. Can the visitors recover their mojo after lunch and give themselves a sniff of squaring the series? Or will Australia pile on the runs and rain down more misery?
Time to grab a bite and wet the whistle. We’ll be back in halfa.
Ben Stokes leads England from the field at tea. Photograph: Hollie Adams/ReutersShare
Updated at 01.18 EST
21st over: Australia 130-1 (Weatherald 59, Labuschagne 27) Stokes enters his sixth over with 0-32. He should be working on his lunchtime speech instead. It will need to be Henry V-at-Agincourt-esque to get England up for the second session. They are flatter than the Barmy Army choir right now. The run-rate is 6.19 and rising and both batters are set, stealing singles at will and slapping every loose ball to the rope.
20th over: Australia 125-1 (Weatherald 57, Labuschagne 25) Good change-up, England. Spinner Will Jacks is into the attack. Can he add a little more egg to the face of Australian selectors who left their own spin champion Nathan Lyon out of the XI? Not immediately he cant. First ball beats everyone and runs for four byes. Ouch. Now another FOUR as Weatherald taps a legside drifter to the rope with ease. A cut square yields another single. Jack now delivers a rank full toss and Labuschagne bludgeons it down the ground for yet another boundary.
Will Jacks bowls his first over. Photograph: Dave Hunt/AAPShare
Updated at 01.35 EST
19th over: Australia 112-1 (Weatherald 52, Labuschagne 21) Since the dismissal of Travis Head, Australia have actually accelerated. This Labuschagne-Weatherald partnership is now worth 32 from as many balls and England look in the doldrums. They have given up 16 boundaries 18 overs and lunch cannot come soon enough. Stokes is trying to lead from the front but this Gabba pitch looks to be flattening.
18th over: Australia 109-1 (Weatherald 50, Labuschagne 20) FOUR more for Weatherald as his hip clip yields an eighth boundary. That is a terrible ball first up from Carse. And now the Tassie tiger doubles the dose, lifting Carse over slips. One bounce, over the fence. Australia’s 100 is up in just the 18th over. And now Jake Weatherald pulls sweetly for his FIRST TEST FIFTY. Well played, young man! That half century came from just 45 balls and featured nine fours and six. Now Labuschagne gets in on the action, pulling another short ball to the rope. And now he DOES IT AGAIN, driving down the ground. That’s 17 from the over!
Jake Weatherald raises his bat after his first Test 50. Photograph: Darrian Traynor/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 00.54 EST
17th over: Australia 92-1 (Weatherald 41, Labuschagne 12) Weatherald works a single to maintain his strike-rate of 100. He continues to look the part at Test level. Labuschagne is into his 60th Test and now shows why, leaning on a full ball from Stokes and sending it down the ground for FOUR. He takes another two through mid-on to make it eight from the over.
Ben Stokes reacts after Marnus Labuschagne hits him for four. Photograph: Jason O’Brien/ShutterstockShare
Updated at 00.54 EST
16th over: Australia 84-1 (Weatherald 40, Labuschagne 6) Dangerous leave, Marnie! Carse got that one to duck back and it shaved the off stump. Oohs and Aahs ensue as England bask in the dopamine squirt of Head’s dismissal. That will sober them up a little though. Labuschagne cuts crisply through the slips cordon for FOUR.
Updated at 00.42 EST
15th over: Australia 80-1 (Weatherald 40, Labuschagne 2) Massive bounce for Ben Stokes! And again Labuschagne makes a late decision to shoulder arms and almost comes undone as the ball ricochets off his gloves and narrowly misses the stumps. That’s how Jofra Archer did Marnus in the first innings at Perth. England’s fans are up and about now England have their first, the prized scalp of Travis Head.