I think so
It is not seen well, but it is tolerated and pretty much widespread.
My father used to smack me wen I was little. I am 24 now.
A smack in the face is worth more than a thousand threats of punishment.
If you need to physically attack someone it’s because you don’t know how to solve things via effective communication.
I think it’s better to spend time understanding how a kid works, what are their needs, etc… It’s more productive.
Violence = Incompetence
Kids are not stupid, and if they happen to be stupid its probably because they have learned how to be stupid via their parents.
As someone who was smacked, and made to be afraid it has taken to hit nearly 30 years of age to recover even 75% from the trauma, my own subsequent anger problems, acceptance problems and mental health issues.
Communication is better unless your Son/Daughter is becoming a career criminal or something lol. Better to tap on the leg or just avoid smacking at all if possible.
Had this conversation with some friends the other day (all Spanish). 11 out of the 13 people on the table (ages between 26 and 33) had been smacked by their parents at some point. And the spectrum went from soft slaps in the butt to proper beating… some other got thrown in cold showers,etc. So ya, I would say is pretty normal. Although parents refrain from doing it in public because as you say it’s illegal
one can educate with respect and love, but the flip-flop does not leave delinquents.
Sort of tolerated but sort of frown upon at the same time.
It was common before but the number of parents who find it unacceptable is growing.
Interestingly when I spoke of this topics with people, those who were raised with smacking find completely acceptable and those raised without it think of it as the hallmark of an incompetent parent.
En España, al niño si le hace falta, se le da hasta un Bombazo Batista.
Sometimes a smack in the hands or butt is more efficient than a thousand words. And patience is not unlimited. Beatings are unacceptable though
In Spain I guess it depends on your family’s social class, lower class is well known for being more rude or tougher with the kids. But getting punished without tv I guess it’s more common nowadays. Hitting kids is something that has been getting lost since the 60′ and the 70′ till the 90′. Actually is frowned upon and illegal since the 00′ I guess
child abuse is in my experience widespread throughout the country and rarely recognized as the harmful issue that it is. my own grandmother claims that she quite literally “doesn’t understand” how physical abuse can be traumatic “because she’s too old and was raised differently”. i dont think it’s illegal to hit your kids in spain (i think the more obvious cases of physical abuse eg beatings might be, but a lot of the time its awful verbal abuse or like smacks and im not sure if legally thats considered abuse yet) but it should absolutely be. when i’d tell people that my parents hit me (which has led to a horrible history of unmedicated chronic mental illness that keeps getting worse and worse, making daily life hell as it affects me not only mentally but physically) they’d just say that they do it “out of love”, downplay it or ignore it entirely because its the norm. i haven’t spoken to younger parents, so i don’t know current views abt it but i imagine people are starting to see how awful it is. all parents i know are fine with verbal or physical abuse towards their children.
yeah, pretty common, atleast when i was a kid and getting slapped for being an idiot. And for the record, that’s not much, i was born in 2001
I see it all the time in Andalusia.
I only was slap once because being 14 I said a horrible thing to my mother.
I never said again. I apologized and that s it.
I will only use it in extreme cases.
I’m from a rural area, moderate slap in the ass/back of the head or the classic cop de xancla are not frowned upon and are generally accepted in public if the kids are being total assholes.
Ufff , if you are 30+ in spain, for sure you had been bitten by your parents.
It’s a classic, in my home the most fierce weapon was the wooden spoon from my mother while cooking.
I remember my grandpa (italian) giving me some extra spicy face palms jajaja
Let’s not talk if you go out of the big cities into old fashion towns.
Una hostia a tiempo
From experience, I tell you. They still consider it, not acceptable, but highly needed for “discipline”. Spanking, smacking, slapping, hitting with the slipper, yelling and cursing at them, tell them not to say a word and go to their room, break and throw away their toys if they fail at school,…
Because “if not, the kid is gonna grow up in a bad manner, and they’re not gonna get traumatized anyways”.
And I tell you. It was WAY WORSE when my parents were kids.
a smack in the butt for very bad behavior is considered acceptable
Not at all, maybe is the current reason why reggaeton still being heard
From my point of view, one thing is abuse, another thing is necessity.
Of course that would depend on the situation and kid itself; I never got myself beaten nor my brother, but I got threatened with that tho.
I can see a lot of kids (including some of my cousins) whose parents are/were afraid/against any minimal source of threat/violence, and they are awfully spoiled.
Once again, that’s just my personal opinion, and I will state again, violence and abuse is something I’m against.
Cuando hacia primaria nuestra profe usaba el archiconocido “coscorron”, dedo anular ligeramente levantado haciendo puño, jajajaja anda que no le haciamos caso ni nada, eso era como la sandalia voladora de la mamma, no tanto como el cinturon de señor padre, eso ya era para ocasiones graves, pero de eso ya hace un par de decadas, ahora dudo que sea algo normal en las clases ni en la casa, en general.
I’ve received corporal punishment once/twice every two months or so, in the form of slap in the butt/face, and maybe a knuckle to the head (copón), especially during a time when I was a kid right before adolescence because I was a compulsive liar, and generally was causing trouble at home and at school, mostly from my rather, who due to stress at work and family issues would get angry very quickly. Anyway, the corporal punishment stopped being used once I became a teenager and it was never really and issue.
Still, I love and respect my rather and as a matter of fact, when I was around 15 he had a heart to heart with me and apologized to me since he felt that he used too much corporal punishment and it all came to the fact that he was having a tough time at work, etc. and deeply apologized to me. My father was raised very strictly and even he knew that his father abused corporal punishment when he was a kid, and even attended an English onboarding school in the 1960s where it was common for teachers to hit students to discipline them.
IMO one thing is child abuse in the form of unrestricted physical punishment even for slight faults and another, totally different thing is a single, rarely used “hostia a tiempo (call It slap atvthe right time)” that defuses a situation and helps you regain control when a child or teenager is being a complete unrasonable asshole and is beyond listening to what you have to say. Generally by the time one is a teenager corporal punishment is already not advised since reasoning and dialogue is easier.
I believe in Spain most parents have moved to this second mentality. Corporal punishment isn’t as rampante as it was 20 years ago, and it’s frown upon.
I don’t have any children yet, but I know that physical punishment will be the absolute last resort, only when 99% of other option have failed, and even then I’d feel horrible. People here say that hitting doesn’t teach anything to kids and that’s right, but in certain cases it can be the only resort to regain control in a situation when you want to stop your child from doing something bad and/or potentially harmful to itself or others.
my parents used to hit me until like 10 year old but only when i did something really bad, it worked.
My parents used to hit me when I was a kid, when I did something wrong but mostly for my horrible grades. Although especially my dad was specially “motivated” to hit me when things were going bad economically. Beside this, I wouldn’t like to smack my children to “discipline” them, I find it gross despite how bad is the behaviour of the kid, but I also find reasonable why some parents still do it.
28 comments
I think so
It is not seen well, but it is tolerated and pretty much widespread.
My father used to smack me wen I was little. I am 24 now.
A smack in the face is worth more than a thousand threats of punishment.
If you need to physically attack someone it’s because you don’t know how to solve things via effective communication.
I think it’s better to spend time understanding how a kid works, what are their needs, etc… It’s more productive.
Violence = Incompetence
Kids are not stupid, and if they happen to be stupid its probably because they have learned how to be stupid via their parents.
As someone who was smacked, and made to be afraid it has taken to hit nearly 30 years of age to recover even 75% from the trauma, my own subsequent anger problems, acceptance problems and mental health issues.
Communication is better unless your Son/Daughter is becoming a career criminal or something lol. Better to tap on the leg or just avoid smacking at all if possible.
Had this conversation with some friends the other day (all Spanish). 11 out of the 13 people on the table (ages between 26 and 33) had been smacked by their parents at some point. And the spectrum went from soft slaps in the butt to proper beating… some other got thrown in cold showers,etc. So ya, I would say is pretty normal. Although parents refrain from doing it in public because as you say it’s illegal
one can educate with respect and love, but the flip-flop does not leave delinquents.
Sort of tolerated but sort of frown upon at the same time.
It was common before but the number of parents who find it unacceptable is growing.
Interestingly when I spoke of this topics with people, those who were raised with smacking find completely acceptable and those raised without it think of it as the hallmark of an incompetent parent.
En España, al niño si le hace falta, se le da hasta un Bombazo Batista.
Sometimes a smack in the hands or butt is more efficient than a thousand words. And patience is not unlimited. Beatings are unacceptable though
[Nos pegan](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/shtchHDxMH8)
Who said it’s totally unacceptable in Germany
Una hostia a tiempo quita muchas tonterias
In Spain I guess it depends on your family’s social class, lower class is well known for being more rude or tougher with the kids. But getting punished without tv I guess it’s more common nowadays. Hitting kids is something that has been getting lost since the 60′ and the 70′ till the 90′. Actually is frowned upon and illegal since the 00′ I guess
child abuse is in my experience widespread throughout the country and rarely recognized as the harmful issue that it is. my own grandmother claims that she quite literally “doesn’t understand” how physical abuse can be traumatic “because she’s too old and was raised differently”. i dont think it’s illegal to hit your kids in spain (i think the more obvious cases of physical abuse eg beatings might be, but a lot of the time its awful verbal abuse or like smacks and im not sure if legally thats considered abuse yet) but it should absolutely be. when i’d tell people that my parents hit me (which has led to a horrible history of unmedicated chronic mental illness that keeps getting worse and worse, making daily life hell as it affects me not only mentally but physically) they’d just say that they do it “out of love”, downplay it or ignore it entirely because its the norm. i haven’t spoken to younger parents, so i don’t know current views abt it but i imagine people are starting to see how awful it is. all parents i know are fine with verbal or physical abuse towards their children.
yeah, pretty common, atleast when i was a kid and getting slapped for being an idiot. And for the record, that’s not much, i was born in 2001
I see it all the time in Andalusia.
I only was slap once because being 14 I said a horrible thing to my mother.
I never said again. I apologized and that s it.
I will only use it in extreme cases.
I’m from a rural area, moderate slap in the ass/back of the head or the classic cop de xancla are not frowned upon and are generally accepted in public if the kids are being total assholes.
Ufff , if you are 30+ in spain, for sure you had been bitten by your parents.
It’s a classic, in my home the most fierce weapon was the wooden spoon from my mother while cooking.
I remember my grandpa (italian) giving me some extra spicy face palms jajaja
Let’s not talk if you go out of the big cities into old fashion towns.
Una hostia a tiempo
From experience, I tell you. They still consider it, not acceptable, but highly needed for “discipline”. Spanking, smacking, slapping, hitting with the slipper, yelling and cursing at them, tell them not to say a word and go to their room, break and throw away their toys if they fail at school,…
Because “if not, the kid is gonna grow up in a bad manner, and they’re not gonna get traumatized anyways”.
And I tell you. It was WAY WORSE when my parents were kids.
a smack in the butt for very bad behavior is considered acceptable
Not at all, maybe is the current reason why reggaeton still being heard
From my point of view, one thing is abuse, another thing is necessity.
Of course that would depend on the situation and kid itself; I never got myself beaten nor my brother, but I got threatened with that tho.
I can see a lot of kids (including some of my cousins) whose parents are/were afraid/against any minimal source of threat/violence, and they are awfully spoiled.
Once again, that’s just my personal opinion, and I will state again, violence and abuse is something I’m against.
Cuando hacia primaria nuestra profe usaba el archiconocido “coscorron”, dedo anular ligeramente levantado haciendo puño, jajajaja anda que no le haciamos caso ni nada, eso era como la sandalia voladora de la mamma, no tanto como el cinturon de señor padre, eso ya era para ocasiones graves, pero de eso ya hace un par de decadas, ahora dudo que sea algo normal en las clases ni en la casa, en general.
I’ve received corporal punishment once/twice every two months or so, in the form of slap in the butt/face, and maybe a knuckle to the head (copón), especially during a time when I was a kid right before adolescence because I was a compulsive liar, and generally was causing trouble at home and at school, mostly from my rather, who due to stress at work and family issues would get angry very quickly. Anyway, the corporal punishment stopped being used once I became a teenager and it was never really and issue.
Still, I love and respect my rather and as a matter of fact, when I was around 15 he had a heart to heart with me and apologized to me since he felt that he used too much corporal punishment and it all came to the fact that he was having a tough time at work, etc. and deeply apologized to me. My father was raised very strictly and even he knew that his father abused corporal punishment when he was a kid, and even attended an English onboarding school in the 1960s where it was common for teachers to hit students to discipline them.
IMO one thing is child abuse in the form of unrestricted physical punishment even for slight faults and another, totally different thing is a single, rarely used “hostia a tiempo (call It slap atvthe right time)” that defuses a situation and helps you regain control when a child or teenager is being a complete unrasonable asshole and is beyond listening to what you have to say. Generally by the time one is a teenager corporal punishment is already not advised since reasoning and dialogue is easier.
I believe in Spain most parents have moved to this second mentality. Corporal punishment isn’t as rampante as it was 20 years ago, and it’s frown upon.
I don’t have any children yet, but I know that physical punishment will be the absolute last resort, only when 99% of other option have failed, and even then I’d feel horrible. People here say that hitting doesn’t teach anything to kids and that’s right, but in certain cases it can be the only resort to regain control in a situation when you want to stop your child from doing something bad and/or potentially harmful to itself or others.
my parents used to hit me until like 10 year old but only when i did something really bad, it worked.
My parents used to hit me when I was a kid, when I did something wrong but mostly for my horrible grades. Although especially my dad was specially “motivated” to hit me when things were going bad economically. Beside this, I wouldn’t like to smack my children to “discipline” them, I find it gross despite how bad is the behaviour of the kid, but I also find reasonable why some parents still do it.