I love that {CityName}Live sites always need your browser to download 800 petabytes of ads before showing you the 7 second video clip and the 3 paragraph article -_-
Until you’re confronted by a badger you don’t appreciate how alarming it can be.
Years ago I went out in the middle of the night in dressing gown and slippers, armed only with a broom to investigate what I thought was foxes at the bins.
Nope.
It was a badger which, I can only presume, was angry based on the hellish noise it made. Realising how little defense a dressing gown gives you against huge claws and sharp looking teeth I beat a hasty retreat
We’ve really gone soft as a species.
The over-the-shoulder image of a badger sprinting past a Walls chest freezer, complete with motion blur, really sells this story.
So badger likes a bit of curry with his mashed potato.
You may take may petrol……BUT YOULL NEVER TAKE MY CURRY Mr Brock
This is the most British sounding headline I’ve ever read. Tried to read this to the oh, but couldn’t stop laughing at the mental image of this story going along with the benny Hill theme.
Man, I would 100% give it the ol’ Dead Space Stomp.
Badgers are now as bad as swans. Once the swans realised they were personally protected by Her Late Majesty they would go around terrorising people.
Now badgers know that no-one can harm them. This is is just one incident on a slippery slope to roaming badger gangs.
The Reach sites get a lot of (deserved) flack, but kudos to the journalist/AI that wrote this one, it’s great.
see were the war on badgers gets you, after baiting and the cull the gloves are off.
You’ve got to love local news. It’s is crazy stories like this that you want more of in life.
A good tip for running away from badgers is to do so with your head looking over your shoulder facing it, trust the terrain ahead as taking your eye of the badger will allow it to gain a yard. You have to maintain eye contact but this also causes you to slow as the badger can use hypnosis.
You can try running backwards but that’s not going to work because badgers are faster backwards runners.
Some people try leaping and skipping because badgers often have no time for that sort of thing.
15 comments
Amazing! xD
I love that {CityName}Live sites always need your browser to download 800 petabytes of ads before showing you the 7 second video clip and the 3 paragraph article -_-
Until you’re confronted by a badger you don’t appreciate how alarming it can be.
Years ago I went out in the middle of the night in dressing gown and slippers, armed only with a broom to investigate what I thought was foxes at the bins.
Nope.
It was a badger which, I can only presume, was angry based on the hellish noise it made. Realising how little defense a dressing gown gives you against huge claws and sharp looking teeth I beat a hasty retreat
We’ve really gone soft as a species.
The over-the-shoulder image of a badger sprinting past a Walls chest freezer, complete with motion blur, really sells this story.
So badger likes a bit of curry with his mashed potato.
You may take may petrol……BUT YOULL NEVER TAKE MY CURRY Mr Brock
This is the most British sounding headline I’ve ever read. Tried to read this to the oh, but couldn’t stop laughing at the mental image of this story going along with the benny Hill theme.
Man, I would 100% give it the ol’ Dead Space Stomp.
Badgers are now as bad as swans. Once the swans realised they were personally protected by Her Late Majesty they would go around terrorising people.
Now badgers know that no-one can harm them. This is is just one incident on a slippery slope to roaming badger gangs.
The Reach sites get a lot of (deserved) flack, but kudos to the journalist/AI that wrote this one, it’s great.
see were the war on badgers gets you, after baiting and the cull the gloves are off.
I for one, bow to our new badger overlords.
Policeman who walked through the door be like:
https://tenor.com/G7PM.gif
You’ve got to love local news. It’s is crazy stories like this that you want more of in life.
A good tip for running away from badgers is to do so with your head looking over your shoulder facing it, trust the terrain ahead as taking your eye of the badger will allow it to gain a yard. You have to maintain eye contact but this also causes you to slow as the badger can use hypnosis.
You can try running backwards but that’s not going to work because badgers are faster backwards runners.
Some people try leaping and skipping because badgers often have no time for that sort of thing.