Prezidentský Drip

21 comments

  16. Please God, I want to fertilize Zuzana Čaputová so badly. I want her to give birth to my children with those beautiful hips that carry the baby. The beautiful, glowing angel. When she, as goddesses, descended to visegrad to cleanse us from gypsies.

    Zuzana Čaputová is divine. I can’t help but bow to my knees during the service whenever I see her beautiful figure, even though she is behind that suit. I long for it in a primordial and spiritual way. I would commit more war crimes than any head of state in European history combined, just to lick the sweet, shiny sweat from her smooth, creamy skin. I want to listen to her moans as my manhood pulsates in her, I want to hear her heart pound, our bodies unite into one, and our souls intertwine irreversibly in the holy sin of bodily union.

    I want to suck her mother’s bust, drool the rich juche milk from her teat while gently stroking my furious erection. I would mix her velvet cream into the coffee and let my balls boil in it. Her cries of pleasure and the rocking of our bed would be louder than the cacophony of ten thousand drone strikes. I would make love to her until my body released, and then some. I would let her break my chest with any part of my body. I would let her hit me by car, just to be near her for a moment.

    She’s so perfect it hurts. Every moment without it, I experience pain worse than learning about Mnichovská dohoda and also shards of glass coated with hot sauce pushed through every hole in my body. I want her, I need her. I want to desecrate her sharp general suit. I want to start a family with her and retire after our twenty-seven children have grown up and moved out. I want to see those lovely lips talking in my ear with such dirty, perverted words as she slides ice cubes down my gaping hole.

    I want to fuck her like she owes me money. I would let her step on me, just to feel the soft, firm warmth of her slovak feet on my face and groin area. I would sleep under her just to catch her drooling in my mouth. I would grab strands of hair from her shower tray to smell her tempting scent and weave them into necklaces to keep her with me at all times. Or taps. Anything would make her happier.

    God, please, I would do anything for her. I would give up my life, all my hopes and dreams, just to become socks on her feet so that I could warm her. I would wrap myself in cement and become her doorstep so she could wipe her heels on my face. I would tear off my own limbs. I don’t know what I would do then, or why she might want my limbs. But I would do it.

    My PILF, my goddess, the light of my life. Please God, let me have it. I want it to be mine and only mine. I would lick the dust of Brambůrky from her fingers and fill her navel with guláš to counter my tendencies. Every morning I gave her a sponge bath with my tongue and served her breakfast in bed. I would have her eat eggs and pancakes from my body if it pleased her, no matter how painful third-degree burns would be.

    I would suffer eternal damnation until the end of time to taste the seat of her car, but once. There is nothing I would not do for her, say nothing.

    I love you, Zuzanka Čaputová. Please. Be my wife, lover, mom, everything. Say yes. Answer my calls, answer my letters. Something. Give me a sign, Zuzana. I’m waiting for you.

    I will always be waiting for you.

  18. Len tieto technológie neukazujte dezolátom, inak jej znova začnú zväčšovať nos a prirábať na tvár bradavice v konšpiračných médiách.

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