This is an Email I received today. Any of yous feckers match the initials?
Edit: bit of mood swing from the old ‘congratulation. you have inherited…blah blah blah. 😉
That’s me, but I wanted him to either give you Botox or freeze your perfect face with liquid nitrogen. It seems something got lost in translation.
In hindsight I shouldn’t have said that I didn’t want to see you grow old.
You should run away, sell what you can, clear out your accounts and head for the airport.
Somewhere in Central America maybe, Costa Rica is nice I hear.
Enjoy your botcholism, I have it brewing now bitch. Else pay me!
You know they’re serious with a font like that.
Someone deserves to be killed for using that font
The comic sans assassin.
Alan Kelly’s Russian hitman assassin cousin
Call him a dildo, even if you do get whacked I imagine a world class assassin has never received a reply like that and he might respect you for it
That’s nice, he’s giving you a heads up. Sound lad Ivan is
This guy sounds like a complete chancer. I definitely wouldn’t pay him to learn who put the hit on you.
Sincerely,
Haighton Lovett Fairchild Rothschild
Happened to me last week, pal. And I’m sorry to say this and dont want to frighten you, but I’m dead. He got me.
I like that he didn’t specify the Nitrogen had been compressed into liquid form. I know he said “splash” but I prefer to think he’s just pointing an outlet of N2 gas in your face (makes up 78% of the f*cking atmosphere)
Reply on Saturday either saying “sorry just seen this as was in my spam folder” or pretend to be a relative and say you died from poisoning and police are tracking them for the murder.
Have you an xbox and if so can I have it?
That’s a very playful font for a cold blooded assassin
They’re not being very clear, is it 48 hours upon RECEIPT of the email, or 48 hours upon READING the email?
Shoddy workmanship tbh, based on this, he’ll probably put 6 lemsip into your drink and think that’ll do it.
You should be fine.
Your mission Ethan, if you choose to accept it……
It’s original anyway, you have to give him that much
Time to sign up for the biggest life insurance amount you can get and put it in a trust for your kids/family.. make sure to read the print and ensure it’s effective immediately..
That said, I’m assuming this is a troll/scam so look forward to hearing from you in 48 hours..
Please respond with “I’ve forwarded this onto the gardai, expect a response in 20-30 working days” 😂
Enjoy
Ivan has just been doxed. Interestingly does anyone remember those letters doing the rounds as a kid (im old) and something like if you didn’t reply or something you have bad luck? What were they called again its annoying me? Who the f wrote them? So many questions. Enjoy your penis enlargement promos ivan.
He’s going to splash Nitrogen on my face?? It only makes up 78% of the air, how will I survive 100% Nitrogen gas sprayed upon my face??!?
Give us an update if you die.
You know he’s serious because he’s contacting you from a PIRATE ADDRESS.
You’ll be walking the plank soon
25 comments
This is an Email I received today. Any of yous feckers match the initials?
Edit: bit of mood swing from the old ‘congratulation. you have inherited…blah blah blah. 😉
That’s me, but I wanted him to either give you Botox or freeze your perfect face with liquid nitrogen. It seems something got lost in translation.
In hindsight I shouldn’t have said that I didn’t want to see you grow old.
You should run away, sell what you can, clear out your accounts and head for the airport.
Somewhere in Central America maybe, Costa Rica is nice I hear.
Enjoy your botcholism, I have it brewing now bitch. Else pay me!
You know they’re serious with a font like that.
Someone deserves to be killed for using that font
The comic sans assassin.
Alan Kelly’s Russian hitman assassin cousin
Call him a dildo, even if you do get whacked I imagine a world class assassin has never received a reply like that and he might respect you for it
That’s nice, he’s giving you a heads up. Sound lad Ivan is
This guy sounds like a complete chancer. I definitely wouldn’t pay him to learn who put the hit on you.
Sincerely,
Haighton Lovett Fairchild Rothschild
Happened to me last week, pal. And I’m sorry to say this and dont want to frighten you, but I’m dead. He got me.
I like that he didn’t specify the Nitrogen had been compressed into liquid form. I know he said “splash” but I prefer to think he’s just pointing an outlet of N2 gas in your face (makes up 78% of the f*cking atmosphere)
Reply on Saturday either saying “sorry just seen this as was in my spam folder” or pretend to be a relative and say you died from poisoning and police are tracking them for the murder.
Have you an xbox and if so can I have it?
That’s a very playful font for a cold blooded assassin
They’re not being very clear, is it 48 hours upon RECEIPT of the email, or 48 hours upon READING the email?
Shoddy workmanship tbh, based on this, he’ll probably put 6 lemsip into your drink and think that’ll do it.
You should be fine.
Your mission Ethan, if you choose to accept it……
It’s original anyway, you have to give him that much
Time to sign up for the biggest life insurance amount you can get and put it in a trust for your kids/family.. make sure to read the print and ensure it’s effective immediately..
That said, I’m assuming this is a troll/scam so look forward to hearing from you in 48 hours..
Please respond with “I’ve forwarded this onto the gardai, expect a response in 20-30 working days” 😂
Enjoy
Ivan has just been doxed. Interestingly does anyone remember those letters doing the rounds as a kid (im old) and something like if you didn’t reply or something you have bad luck? What were they called again its annoying me? Who the f wrote them? So many questions. Enjoy your penis enlargement promos ivan.
He’s going to splash Nitrogen on my face?? It only makes up 78% of the air, how will I survive 100% Nitrogen gas sprayed upon my face??!?
Give us an update if you die.
You know he’s serious because he’s contacting you from a PIRATE ADDRESS.
You’ll be walking the plank soon