Is male loneliness a significant issue in Iceland?

11 comments

1. In the source that I posted, the author points to the reason for this massive suicide disparity being due to men not being able to express themselves. Which is a ridiculous claim to me.

   > According to psychiatrist Óttar Guðmundsson, it’s difficult to pinpoint the exact reasons behind these numbers. “It just looks like men are feeling much worse than women,”

   > Another crucial difference lies in the approach to self expression. Even though various social media campaigns have been encouraging men to speak up in order to fight an often toxic culture of machismo, men are still much less likely to talk about their own feelings than women do.

   There’s no way are men committing suicide this much more than women due to not being able to talk about their feelings. That’s a very disdainful way to dismiss their plight and blame it all on sexism. That’s like using someone else’s misery as a stepping stone to push your political agenda even when it has nothing to do.

2. >My best guess is that most men who unhappy are lonely due to very high standards by women.

   You can say that, but that sounds like a pretty big leap that I’d have to see evidence for. I’d expect a lower birth-rate if this were the case, and ours is actually somewhat higher than our neighbors’.

   I don’t know what the issue is, but I think its roots are in the education system. Our educational disparity between boys and girls (in girls’ favor) is quite a bit bigger than in other developed countries from what I’ve seen, so any solution should probably start there.

3. ‘ang on. Is your hypothesis that men are killing themselves because women are too picky? How do you explain that most of the suicides took place in the Westfjörds? Do you have any professional qualifications in this field?

4. No, and that reasoning sounds pretty incelly,.

   Men in Iceland are traditionally supposed to be hard as a rock and cold as ice, that’s what was needed to survive here until very recently, emotions have been considered a weakness for centuries and just because that mindset doesn’t apply anymore the culture has had a hard time changing and expresses itself in men who are afraid to open themselves to their feelings which causes them to stuff them down instead of talking about them, which snowballs into suicide. Suicide is a deeply personal choice and has nothing to do with the opinion of another.

5. Reading your replies on this post you seem to be stuck on your own narritive despite good reasonings from others on this thread. “Women have too high standards” feels like a projection and is in no way substantiated by any sources. My own experience, coupled with a quick googling, suggests that social isolation, stress, addictions, emotional suppression and underlying mental health issues are the main factors for these rates.

   And no, social isolation does not imply that women have too high standards. I agree with other commenters, this post feels incelly.

6. Lmao you sound like you’ve never heard of the internet, or the fact that a huge percentage of Scandinavian men choose wives or girlfriends online from the Philippines or other SE Asian countries. If anything it’s Scandinavian women who have no options, because the internet has made it so much easier for men to import wives from disadvantaged countries just looking for a good life.

   You think anyone cares about whom Scandinavian women are or are not picking? Like, for real?

7. I was almost one of those suicide statistics, between ages 13-26 I was extremely depressed and suicidal with 2 attempted suicides under my belt and lengthy stays at mental institutions

   The reason for my suicide attempts had absolutely nothing to do with women and even the best woman, the most gorgeous woman in the world wouldn’t have been able to turn this around.

   I don’t really know what causes such high male suicide rates, but it’s far more complicated reason than just “it’s women’s fault”

   Women are allowed to have high standards and so are you. If you aren’t blessed with genetically good looks then be interesting at something else.

   Don’t go blasting the Internet blaming women for your shortcomings.

   *edit: spelling*

8. I’d rather say the reason are the standard reasons. depression, men going for more effective suicide methods, getting left behind due to male dropoff in the education system, a tendency for men to be more afraid of sharing and getting help when they feel bad., and difficulty breaking in to established friend groups. Much like elsewhere.

   Women here are not significantly more picky than elsewhere and just a bit of confidence goes miles. I have accidentally blundered my way in to relationships numerous times without being able to flirt for my life and a very average look. If you’re not an asshole and offer anything beyond a pulse and basic manners you likely are a candidate for someones romantic life.

9. The fuck did i just read? This is r/iceland not r/incel

10. Pretty sure it’s more the fact that men have been taught not to show or share their emotions which they then end bottling up until they do something drastic like attempting suicide. I mean you could also look at drug usage in Iceland from that point of view. Also some research has been done on methods used to commit suicide and men tend to use methods that are harder to reverse than women.

11. The fifties called, they want their point of view back.