This tree has the most ridiculous conkers ever, they’re about the size of a tennis ball and all over.

Will I inevitably go mad with power when I conker the world with these?

by Northerncold

5 comments

  1. Somebody will inevitably beat you with an absolutely tiny, shrivelled one that weighs almost nothing.

    You will swear that the tiny offender smells faintly of vinegar, and feels like it’s been baked – but you’ll be unable to prove it.

    With your mind indelibly tarnished by defeat at the hands of this lilliputian conquerer you will grow old and bitter. It will haunt you.

  2. I thought I’d found the mother of all conkers on a low-hanging branch – just above my car…didn’t even have to throw a stick up, into the tree.. just reached up and grabbed it.

    I was gutted, after carefully prising it open, to find three normal-sized conkers in there.

    Stabbed my thumb on the shell, as well.

  3. Walking to work yesterday and there were loads of them on the pathway. Do kids still play conkers nowadays? Would have been snapped up when I was younger.

  4. I’m old. As in Grange Hill old. And I still get overly excited about conker season. I’ve not missed having at least a big pocket full every year, once. It’s the law.

  5. They’re all tiny round our way, and the trees look half dead, a mixture of drought and leaf miner have really done for them this year.

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