Riding the coattails of Gremlins’ success, 1988’s Hobgoblins is the best kind of cheap imitation. And by cheap, I mean $15,000 total.
Known and celebrated as one of the worst films ever made, Hobgoblins somehow maintains its B-movie charm, mostly thanks to commentary shows like Mystery Science Theater 3000 and RiffTrax. On its own, Hobgoblins is a fun watch because the acting is awful, the creature design is even worse, and the in-universe logic holds up about as well as a paper bag in a flash flood of acid rain.
Hobgoblins 1988
Seeking out the commentary versions mentioned above makes the experience even better, since Hobgoblins is the perfect movie to watch with friends as puppets attack people at a strip club.
Mind-Manipulating Hobgoblins On A Movie Lot
When Kevin (Tom Bartlett) takes a new security job at a movie lot, he’s warned by his boss, Mr. McCreedy (Jeffrey Culver), never to open the giant bank vault behind the barred gate on the property. An earlier scene already hinted that some sort of flesh-eating creatures are locked inside.
After his first day, Kevin heads home to his girlfriend, Amy (Paige Sullivan), who wishes he were more like their friend, Nick (Billy Frank), a recently returned Army tough guy. Rounding out the group are Daphne, Nick’s nymphomaniac girlfriend, and Kyle (Steven Boggs), a phone-sex addict.
After a way-too-long front yard play fight with garden tools that clang in unison with the film’s score (probably the most impressive sequence in the movie), Kevin loses to Nick, prompting Amy to mock him for being soft. Wanting to prove himself, Kevin returns to the studio armed with a gun he has just learned how to hold and opens the vault to release the hobgoblins. These creatures prey on victims by granting their wildest fantasies before killing them, and naturally, they head straight to Kevin’s house because they somehow know where he lives without giving it a second thought.
From there, it’s a blur of cheap jokes, sexual innuendo, puppet brawls, and fake blood. The creature logic is especially entertaining: we’re told the hobgoblins are attracted to light, but writer/director/producer Rick Sloane can’t seem to decide when that rule applies. Sometimes they appear in bright lights, other times in total darkness. The idea is solid, but the execution is hilariously poor.
The Saddest Strip Club
With most of Hobgoblin’s conflict coming to a head at a local strip club where Amy’s now living out her wildest goblin-induced exotic dancer fantasy (they don’t really explain this aside from showing it happening), the film’s nonexistent budget shows its final form.
There aren’t enough extras to pack the club out, the tables and chairs look like they were rented from a party store, and the bouncer, Roadrash (Duane Whitaker), reads his lines, drinks beer, and does not do much else. Nick is conveniently armed with a seemingly infinite amount of hand grenades, of which he throws plenty, indoors, with varying levels of collateral damage.
Streaming Hobgoblins
Watching Hobgoblins is a profoundly stupid experience, but one that’s worth your time if you’re into low-budget, barely B-movie schlock. As contrived as its premise is, and as terrible as its acting, creature design, lighting, audio, special effects, and buildup, and climax are, it’s an absolute riot of misdirected creativity that you owe it to yourself to watch.
Or, if you find that your brain has been worn completely smooth after watching the first 10 minutes, you can fire up the MST3K or RiffTrax version and have a great time watching professionals make fun of it on your behalf.
As of this writing, you can stream Hobgoblins for free on Tubi.