{"id":12642,"date":"2026-04-13T04:25:12","date_gmt":"2026-04-13T04:25:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/12642\/"},"modified":"2026-04-13T04:25:12","modified_gmt":"2026-04-13T04:25:12","slug":"i-escaped-my-boring-london-suburb-and-moved-to-glamorous-paris-but-theres-a-dark-side-to-dating-in-the-city-of-love-that-no-one-tells-you-about","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/12642\/","title":{"rendered":"I escaped my boring London suburb and moved to glamorous Paris – but there’s a dark side to dating in the City of Love that no one tells you about"},"content":{"rendered":"

When I hear people ranting and raving about how terrible Paris is – crowded, busy, dirty, overrated – I find myself caught between comprehension and rage.<\/p>\n

Having lived in the French capital for four years, Paris has a special place in my heart; I will always cherish the days I spent there.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But on the other hand, I understand the sentiment. The city is not always all it\u2019s cracked up to be.<\/p>\n

Flaky pastries, strong coffee, excellent wine (even the bottom-shelf supermarket stuff is good there), sure.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But also pouring rain for most of the year, rude residents and a work culture I struggled to fit into.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re not a born-and-bred Parisian, life here is not always easy. Even my French friends – who hail from the likes of Lyon and the south of France<\/a> – would agree, there\u2019s a shared language between those who\u2019ve grown up in the city that no amount of French fluency can teach.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I should know – I\u2019ve tried. Living in Paris for three years in the early 2000s – and again in 2021 – gave me the best leg up I could have asked for.<\/p>\n

For me, I hoped living in France as a child would have helped me to integrate when I moved back in my early twenties. To an extent, it did – I wasn\u2019t met with quite as much attitude as my English-speaking friends.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Travel <\/p>\n

Travel writer Erin Deborah Waks spent four years of her life in Paris\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"While <\/p>\n

While the city is, of course, beautiful, it’s certainly a flawed place, she says<\/p>\n

But in reality, living in the most romantic city on earth isn\u2019t always easy.<\/p>\n

I had dreamed of leaving my north London suburb behind. Nothing screams \u2018hell on earth\u2019 in my book like a leafy neighbourhood, an hour from the city buzz, where everyone knows everyone and a neighbour can just pop over for a coffee unannounced (sorry, Mum and Dad).<\/p>\n

I craved the anonymity of Paris, as well as its glamour.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Above all, I was dying to give dating a try in the ‘City of Love’ – hoping my experiences would be at least a tad more fun than in my suburban enclave.<\/p>\n

And, with the worst of the Covid-19 pandemic behind me, it seemed like the time to go. Armed with a job in marketing and my vintage trench coat, I was off.<\/p>\n

People warn you that Paris is expensive – but coming from London, I wasn\u2019t too worried.\u00a0<\/p>\n

That was until I realised rent for the flat I had chosen would amount to \u00a31,200 – for comparison, my current London apartment sets me back just \u00a31,000 with bills included. The first pitfall I encountered.<\/p>\n

But that wasn’t Paris’ biggest downfall. I was expecting it.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Join the discussion<\/p>\n

Is Paris really a paradise for romance, or is its dating scene just a disappointing illusion?<\/p>\n

\"It's <\/p>\n

It’s marketed as the City of Love – so our writer put the romantic credentials of the city to the test\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Paris \"The <\/p>\n

Paris snapped at sunrise from the top of Montmartre, one of the most romantic places in the city – vs (right), the reality of drinking alone here<\/p>\n

What disappointed me the most was that, for a city that markets itself as romantic, it\u2019s surprisingly difficult to find love here.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I had no such success here – meeting my partner back in comparatively unromantic London years later – while all my friends in Paris seemed devastated by a string of romantic betrayals: everything from prospective dates who wouldn’t commit to full-blown adultery.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The prude English woman in me couldn\u2019t bear it when one man called me his \u2018girlfriend\u2019 on the second date and asked me to meet his parents – with no prior warning.<\/p>\n

Needless to say, there was no third date.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t take it from me, though – the list of romantic failures in Paris are ironic given the city\u2019s reputation as the zenith of romantic.<\/p>\n

One friend told me: \u2018My entire dating experience with dating in France can be summed up as – every French guy I\u2019ve ever dated has proposed to (or actually taken me on) a romantic trip within the first few weeks. And is also doing the same with five other women. And he\u2019s in love with each one.\u2019<\/p>\n

Romantic, sure. But hardly the seeds of a serious relationship.<\/p>\n

In fact, I don\u2019t have a single friend who is still dating someone from Paris. Most of us failed to form strong love connections – and those who did were generally left in a state of utter heartbreak.<\/p>\n

\"Paris <\/p>\n

Paris is beautiful – great for a romantic weekend away. But perhaps not to actually find love…\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"While <\/p>\n

While the city has many perks, dating here can be a struggle – and Erin left to move back to the UK with no handsome Parisian boyfriend in tow<\/p>\n

While I am sure plenty of people find – and keep – love in Paris, for me, the city is far better as a romantic holiday destination with an existing partner than the place to find one in the first place.<\/p>\n

The \u2018romantic\u2019 notion of Paris is fast becoming cheapened – with garish proposals under the Eiffel Tower a dime a dozen, roses sold on street corners, accordian players serenading any \u2018lovers\u2019 (read: tourists strolling, unaware, in their vicinity) and cliched restaurants offering deals on a ‘menu for two’.<\/p>\n

In glossy magazines and in the movies, every female character finds Prince Charming in the high-end restaurants and cafes of Paris.<\/p>\n

In reality, you’re more likely to be dumped by a Luc, Henri or Thomas who just ‘doesn’t have the time to focus on dating right now, mon amour.’<\/p>\n

In a city of so many people, everyone seems to feel replaceable – you can move on from one \u2018girlfriend\u2019 only to find a new one the next day.<\/p>\n

Sure, you could put it all down to me being young, to the decline dating culture the world over, to the presence of online apps in every corner of the globe.<\/p>\n

But it seems most paradoxical that the city in which I\u2019ve found dating the hardest is the one known as the city of love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"When I hear people ranting and raving about how terrible Paris is – crowded, busy, dirty, overrated –…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":12643,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[169,83,27,3685,104],"class_list":{"0":"post-12642","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-london","8":"tag-dailymail","9":"tag-france","10":"tag-london","11":"tag-paris","12":"tag-travel"},"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"https:\/\/pubeurope.com\/@UnitedKingdom\/116395502633722272","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12642","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12642"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12642\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12643"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12642"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12642"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/britain\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12642"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}