Just Between Us
Erectile dysfunction affects far more men than most people realise but it’s still one of the hardest things to say out loud. In this episode, Jennifer talks to Bobby McQuaid, a new dad who spent years believing there was “something wrong” with him, avoiding conversations, and even avoiding a Google search out of fear and shame.
Bobby takes Jennifer back to being 19, in his first serious relationship, when sex felt inevitable until it wasn’t. He describes the confusion of not understanding what was happening, the pain, the panic, and how Ireland’s patchy sex education and constant media messaging left him thinking it should be instant, easy, and effortless. Instead, he spiralled into silence, avoidance, and the kind of secrecy that only grows heavier with time.
He shares how it impacted intimacy and relationships, the guilt that kept him quiet, and the moment everything shifted when he met his now wife, Fiona. For the first time, he told someone and discovered it wasn’t a personal failing, but a medical issue that could be treated. From getting a diagnosis and surgery, to the reality of performance anxiety and needing Viagra, Bobby is honest about the messy, non-linear path of rebuilding confidence and finding a new definition of sex that isn’t just about penetration.
Just Between Us is an Irish Independent podcast hosted by Jennifer Zamparelli. New episodes every Thursday, wherever you get your podcasts.