The couple moved in after just six months of dating, enjoying nearly 50 years of marriage together as Carol switched from being a legal secretary into teaching.
But Carol’s mental health declined in later years, diagnosed with recurrent depressive disorder.
Although this was kept in check by medication, her mental health became affected by her physical health which also began to deteriorate, most notably following a trip to Iceland where she was diagnosed with pneumonia and type 2 diabetes.
Ralph – from Buckhurst Hill – said he and the family sought psychiatric help for Carol, which was “not forthcoming”.
She was admitted to hospital in June 2023 after taking an overdose, described as “a cry for help” by her husband.
Eventually transferred to the St Margaret’s mental health unit in Epping, Carol stayed in hospital for the next five months, where she was resistant to treatment, becoming malnourished and dehydrated.
Coupled with a lack of mobility, it created the perfect conditions for a blood clot to form in her lung, from which she died on 21 November 2023, aged 75.
Ralph has criticised staff at the Essex Partnership University NHS Foundation Trust (EPUT) and their attempts to resuscitate Carol, which he referred to as “shambolic”.
“They were trying to resuscitate her with her being on her side, not on her back, they hadn’t switched the oxygen on,” he told the BBC.
Staff tried to call 999 but did not know they had to press nine first to get an outside line, he explained.
Ralph – who has called for better staff training and more transparency towards families – also said opportunities had been missed by the inquiry itself to try getting answers from the trust.
“I was a bit frustrated because they weren’t being asked the hard questions,” he said, adding that the counsel to the inquiry “seems to adopt a sort of gentlemanly approach”.
“Although there were barristers there representing the families, they couldn’t ask the questions direct, they had to be fed through the counsel to the inquiry.”