Singer Tommy Fleming has said that he has been “living a lie” and has come out publicly as gay for the first time.
Speaking on Newstalk show The Hard Shoulder, the 55-year-old Sligo-born folk singer also spoke about his marriage breakdown and his past drug use.
In his first radio interview since he separated from his wife Tina in October 2025, Fleming also spoke to Newstalk host Ciara Kelly about a private conversation between himself and Tina and their stepdaughter, which was leaked online and subsequently went viral.
Tommy Fleming and Ciara Kelly
Speaking about his marriage breakdown, he said: “For at least ten, 13 years of marriage we were very happy, but small cracks started to appear, mainly from me, and small cracks that were never mended, and with every crack that appeared there was a new crack and a new crack. And those cracks became a chasm.’’
He discussed his decision to come out as gay, saying: ‘’I had been living a lie for all my life really, and the hardest part of that was the energy and the effort it took for this lie to be constantly covered and to be, I suppose, protected and that lie was that I am gay.”
He added: “I am finally living my truth. I am finally being honest, being able to live a life that is true and real and just . . . honest.”
When asked what he would like to say to Tina, Mr Fleming said: “I can’t undo the wrongs I’ve done, I can’t… and I can’t change the past. I can only look ahead and in order for me to survive, in order for me to have a life, I had to tell the truth and own this really.’’
Tommy Fleming
He said the recent revelations about his personal life have had a profound impact on his mental health.
“The best way to explain this one – if the last two weeks were to have happened six or seven months ago, I don’t think I would have survived it,” he said.
“It happened now. I cannot control what people will do or what they’ll say or how they’ll react or what they think, I cannot and I’m not going to try.”
He has also revealed that he was treated at St Patrick’s Mental Health Services after attempting to take his own life last September after he went through “an overwhelming sense of absolute sadness and hopelessness”.
A private phone conversation between Fleming, Tina and their stepdaughter was leaked online recently and has been the subject of much speculation. The singer said the phone call in question was made while he was in St Patrick’s.
“It was recorded without my knowledge, and it was leaked without my knowledge,” he said. “My hand was forced on that one.
“It took away me being able to stand in front of my siblings. What it took away was my right to be able to stand in front of them.
“It also took away my privacy in my suicide attempt in September. That was never meant for the public.”
He also responded to speculation that he had visited gay saunas, used pornography and was at a heightened risk of sexually transmitted diseases.
Asked by Ciara Kelly if he put his former wife at risk of sexually transmitted disease, as alleged in the leaked voice note conversation, Mr Fleming replied: “100% not.’’
Speaking about his struggles with alcohol and drugs, he said: “I medicated with them. They were a painkiller to help me sleep, and it was across a broad spectrum of prescription medication, illegal substances, alcohol, all of the above that I dabbled with. I’m not looking to numb something anymore.’’
The singer ended his interview on an upbeat note and said his priorities now are his mental health, his family, his closest friends: “That’s what’s important to me right now.”
He said that he is looking forward to his upcoming tour. “Oh yeah, I’m absolutely going to perform, it’s the one place I can stand for two and a half hours, and I don’t have to think about anything else,” he said.
“That’s the best therapy I’ve ever had.’’
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