Pictured: Edward Cullen, Doug “Long Drag From a Cigarette, Then Say OK” Rice
Photo-Illustration: Photos: Getty Images; Illustration: Vulture
Chris Hansen says he’s reserving judgement on Primetime — the new movie that portrays him as an egomaniac hopped up on a ratings high for his show To Catch a Predator — because he’s a good journalist. “As a reporter, it’s sort of silly for me to talk about something that I haven’t seen yet,” he said on the Serialously podcast. “My suspicion is that they used my name because it helps in a commercial enterprise.” Hansen added that he has some reservations about the film: “What’s Hollywood’s motive here?”
Hansen lamented that he never got to make his version of his life story, with a very different actor in the lead role. “I didn’t get to choose my own guy,” he said. “Years ago, I had crafted a script and thought Denis Leary would be a good guy to play me — depending on the age of it all.” The difference in vibe is striking. Leary is so honest about being an asshole that he wrote a song about it; Pattinson is such a fabulist he can’t always distinguish the lies he tells to press from his own lived experience. Leary is the quintessential Gen Xer; Pattinson is convinced, despite all vital statistics, that he is Gen Z. Leary starred on Rescue Me for seven seasons, a show about New York firefighters post-9/11; Pattinson’s sole contribution to 9/11 media is very much pre-. And Dennis Leary has never tried to invent a microwavable pasta. Not once! Suffice to say, Hansen’s self-image differs greatly from Lance Oppenheim’s conception. Hansen says he will see the movie next week, so watch this space for more Dennis Leary Updates.
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