Imagine you’re about to go on a first date. You’ve had a shower (hopefully), done your hair, put on a nice scent, picked out some lovely clothes and you’re getting ready to set off.

But there’s one simple aspect missing: a confirmation text. While it might seem unnecessary to some, messaging your date to affirm everything is still on is the “bare minimum” to others.

Christy Murray told Yahoo Lifestyle she recently went through this before she was about to meet up with someone.

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“There was no message at any time during the day to confirm that he would be going, or even on the way, which I think is usually the standard,” she said.

“Luckily, I lived around the corner and it took me five minutes to get there. He only told me he was there at approximately 6:55pm, and the date was meant to be at 7pm.

“Do men not think it is risky to rock up to a date without confirming with the other party?”

Do you have a dating story you’d like to tell? Email stew.perrie@yahooinc.com

She said it’s a small but important step to make someone feel at ease ahead of what could be a nerve-racking experience.

The message only takes a few seconds to compose and can be as simple as ‘see you tonight at 7pm’.

Christy added that this wasn’t a one-off and has happened multiple times by multiple blokes who just show up whenever and wherever it was initially agreed.

Doing this tiny act can also help people who might not have every detail of their lives memorised.

“I’ve heard of many times where people get stood up, or they literally just forget that they have a date planned,” the Sydneysider told Yahoo Lifestyle.

“Let’s be real, life happens, something could have gotten in the way that meant you aren’t able to attend.

“I think just for peace of mind it is nice to confirm the morning of. If I don’t hear from you, I am going to assume that it isn’t on and start to make back up plans.”

Christy isn’t alone in this, and many Aussies said they have a very strict approach to this rule.

“I didn’t get ready when he didn’t confirmed the date,” wrote one person. “He messaged me to say he was running late. I told him I was in the bath and not coming cause he didn’t confirm.”

“I don’t go if there’s no confirmation,” added another.

“I stand them up if the don’t confirm the morning of,” said a third.

How should dates be organised?

It takes two to tango, and some people online suggested that you shouldn’t wait for a confirmation and do it yourself if it’s a pain point.

But in terms of etiquette, Christy said it should be whomever organised the date who reaches out on the day of to confirm with the other party.

Even if there has been consistent back and forth chat between the two parties, she believed it was still necessary.

While Christy felt the morning of is the best time to send that message, she had a cut-off for around 2pm before she starts making back-up plans.

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She added that while it might be a controversial take, she believed it should be the man who organises the first date.

“I think he should pick the time, location and activity that we are doing,” she told Yahoo Lifestyle.

“I am finding that men these days are feeling shy or unsure of what to plan for the first date and that is just a huge red flag to me.

“The only direction I want to be giving is a general area, or cuisine for dinner.”

She added that there is also after-date etiquette to follow.

“I’d like for the guy to message me afterwards saying if he had a good time or not so I’m not left in the dark about how it went,” she said.

“If I don’t receive a message the night of or next morning, I assume you don’t want to see me again and I won’t be reaching out.”

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