\n\tIf you spent time watching early \u201870s Saturday morning kids\u2019 TV, the darkest recesses of your memory bank possibly contain triggering flashes of the short-lived ABC series Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp. This pre-PETA nightmare was basically a simian ripoff of Get Smart! with a cast of chimpanzees in human drag playing agents from APE (the Agency to Prevent Evil) foiling the plots of the nefarious organization known as CHUMP (Criminal Headquarters for Underworld Master Plan). It even featured chimps in hippie garb as undercover spies playing in a groovy band called The Evolution Revolution. And people wonder why so many of us grew up to be head cases.<\/p>\n
\n\tI spent a lot of time thinking about Lancelot Link while watching Primate<\/a> \u2014 and not just wondering how my parents\u2019 gaydars remained unresponsive while I was gushing about Lance\u2019s hip-chick sidekick Mata Hairi and high-camp villainous foes the Duchess and the Dragon Lady. But I digress.<\/p>\n \t\t\t\t\tPrimate\t\t<\/p>\n \n\t\t\t\t\tThe Bottom Line<\/p>\n \tMonkey business turns hairy.<\/p>\n \t\t\t\t\t\t\tRelease date<\/strong>: Friday, Jan. 9 \n\tIt\u2019s a relief in director Johannes Roberts<\/a>\u2019 horror<\/a> movie that there are no actual chimps flapping their gums while voiceover actors dub corny dialogue. Instead, the eponymous primate, whose name is Ben (more about that shortly), is played by movement and mime specialist Miguel Torres Umba in a monkey suit. The physicality is convincing, as are the animal strength, the agitated shrieking and the sudden explosions of violent rage \u2014 even if the masks and prosthetics often tend to recall the headgear worn in 2024\u2019s bizarre Robbie Williams bio-musical, Better Man<\/a>. Suspension of disbelief is a tall order.<\/p>\n \n\tBut Roberts and co-writer Ernest Riera know their B-movie playbook and are not averse to having fun with it. The director is best known for the 2017 Mandy Moore shark thriller 47 Meters Down<\/a>, and he sticks to the monster movie template of perfunctory character introduction before unleashing virtually nonstop mayhem.<\/p>\n \n\tAs is so often the case, the key players are college kids who have just completed their freshman year and are looking to unwind. Lucy (Johnny Sequoyah) invites her lifelong friend Kate (Victoria Wyant) to join her at the luxurious home of her writer father Adam (Troy Kotsur<\/a>), nestled into a Hawaiian cliffside and surrounded by lush rainforests.<\/p>\n \n\tKate gives Lucy an unwelcome surprise by inviting along pushy Hannah (Jessica Alexander), who already spells trouble on the flight and draws the attention of two rowdy frat boys, Drew (Charlie Mann) and Brad (Tienne Simon). Hannah also gets under Lucy\u2019s skin when she comes on strong with Kate\u2019s brother Nick (Benjamin Chang), despite picking up on her host\u2019s longtime crush on him. Clearly, we need a shady bitch to provide satisfaction when she gets a clump of hair ripped out, just as we need douchey party boys to get their jaws torn off or be bludgeoned with a shovel.<\/p>\n \n\tAll this romantic rivalry and interpersonal friction adds up to nothing, however, since as soon as Ben starts rampaging, they are all thrust into the same collective peril. The only relationship that matters is Lucy\u2019s bond with her younger sister Erin (Gia Hunter), who is resentful about being left alone with their dad to grieve their late mother.<\/p>\n \n\tMom was a linguistics professor studying the ability of humans and chimps to communicate, which explains how Ben became the family pet. But unhappily for everyone, Ben gets a nasty bite from a mongoose found in shreds on the floor of his enclosure and goes full freakout. With Adam away at an author event, the teens are left to fend for themselves as casualties quickly pile up.<\/p>\n \n\tThe injuries and thrill kills provide plenty of jump scares and nasty jolts as Ben, frothing at the mouth and scowling like a maniac, tears chunks out of the humans and keeps finding gnarlier ways to dispose of them, starting with one hapless character who quite literally drops out of the picture. Given that chimps can\u2019t swim, the kids take refuge in the pool. But Ben is not easily deterred.<\/p>\n \n\tOn its own terms, Primate delivers, though the script is too psychologically undernourished to make us invest in the characters or feel sympathy for the traumatized chimp, a beloved family member turned ruthless savage by factors beyond his control.<\/p>\n \n\tAudiences with an ounce of sensitivity toward animals whose wild instincts have been stifled by human intervention might see this as a cross between James Marsh\u2019s soulful experimentation study Project Nim<\/a> and the terrifying sitcom chimp incident in Jordan Peele\u2019s Nope<\/a>. But the screenplay fails to muster much compassion for Ben, beyond Lucy and Erin\u2019s initial horror at the idea of killing him. Just the animal\u2019s name alone is disorienting \u2014 I kept waiting for Michael Jackson to sing \u201cBen,\u201d the sweet ode of a lonely boy to his misunderstood pet rat in the 1972 Willard sequel.<\/p>\n \n\tRoberts has cited Cujo as a major inspiration, and just as many dog lovers found that Stephen King adaptation emotionally distressing, chimp sympathizers will likely flinch at this grisly bout of monkey madness. The skillfully rebooted Planet of the Apes<\/a> franchise has coaxed us to think of our simian brethren as complex creatures with significant brain power. But Primate is interested in Ben strictly as a killing machine, as cunning as he is unrelenting. That means the chimpanzee protagonist has scarcely more depth than the diabolical wind-up toy in Osgood Perkins\u2019 The Monkey<\/a>.<\/p>\n \n\tSetting the thriller in Hawaii, the only U.S. state that is rabies-free, was a clever idea. But the cursory reaction of a laboratory veterinarian after Adam sends the mongoose in for testing makes you wonder how serious the animal authorities are about keeping it that way.<\/p>\n \n\tNarrative weaknesses aside, there\u2019s still fun to be had with Roberts\u2019 film as it builds with swift pacing to the formulaic showdown in which it\u2019s up to the sacred family unit to defeat the drooling predator. There are some cute moments \u2014 both amusing and sinister \u2014 involving a speech-generating device that Ben has been taught to use (\u201cLucy. Bad.\u201d) and a nail-biting sequence in which Adam, who is deaf, returns home and is unable to hear the bloodthirsty chimp loping up behind him.<\/p>\n
Cast<\/strong>: Johnny Sequoyah, Jessica Alexander, Troy Kotsur, Victoria Wyant, Gia Hunter, Benjamin Cheng, Charlie Mann, Tienne Simon, Miguel Torres Umba
Director<\/strong>: Johannes Roberts
Screenwriter<\/strong>: Johannes Roberts, Ernest Riera
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tRated R,
\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t1 hour 27 minutes\n\t\t<\/p>\n