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Summer House<\/a><\/p>\n Sleeping On It<\/p>\n \n Season 10<\/p>\n Episode 8\n <\/p>\n \n Editor\u2019s Rating<\/p>\n 3 stars<\/p>\n ***\n <\/p>\n \n Photo: Bravo\n <\/p>\n It\u2019s been a hard season to be a Kyle Cooke defender. And, well, there\u2019s no way to defend what he did this episode. Sorry, Kyle. I love you, but this is some seriously fucked up shit. When everyone returns from the club, he\u2019s DJing for everyone in the VIP room before Amanda heads outside and most of the housemates follow. They\u2019re hanging out by the hot tub and giggling, and Kyle comes outside with his speaker, trying to get the party started again and all eyes back on him. It doesn\u2019t go over well. He tells Amanda that she\u2019s not being supportive. When she tries to push back, he takes his portable speaker, walks back into the house, and says, \u201cFuck you,\u201d to Amanda.<\/p>\n Sorry, but that is no way to ever speak to your spouse. In the heat of an argument, my husband once said it to me. I made sure he knew that if he ever said it again, that I wouldn\u2019t be around to hear it for a third time and that I would also leak all of his nudes on the internet and leave shitty comments on all of them like 2008 Perez Hilton just came back from the dead. This is not how Amanda reacts. She gets up, walks away, and goes into the bathroom to take off her makeup and get ready for bed. She\u2019s so calm that it\u2019s eerie, but also incredibly sad. She\u2019s been through this so many times before, it doesn\u2019t even make a dent, and that makes me want her to get out of there faster than Carl can type \u201ctan lines and zebra print\u201d into the PornHub search bar. In her confessional, she says, \u201cWhat is the point of talking about this? It\u2019s only going to make it worse; he\u2019s not going to take accountability, he\u2019s not going to apologize. I know it\u2019s wrong, the way he speaks to me, I\u2019m fully aware of it. I just know that having a conversation about it isn\u2019t going to go anywhere.\u201d<\/p>\n The only hero in this story is Dr. Elisabeth Wilson\u2019s son, West, and she should be proud of her boy on this day. He goes in to check on Amanda and tells her that Kyle was unprovoked and rude. He comforts her as she cries in the bathroom. When Kyle comes into the room, West goes out and tells him how wrong he is and that he needs to apologize. Kyle tells him that Amanda told him, \u201cFuck you,\u201d first. West tells him that he\u2019s wrong. Kyle says that she said it with her eyes. With her eyes? Kyle, please be serious. He adds that she hates him and wants to spend more time with her friends than she does with him. Well, when he speaks to her like that, it\u2019s no wonder she would rather hang out in her PJs by the hot tub. On the way out, West tells Amanda that he loves her and to text if she needs anything. Now that is a real man, right there, not only supporting his female friends but willing to stand up to another man and tell him when he\u2019s acting like an asshole. Yeah, he can be a fuck up sometimes, but West is still the best.<\/p>\n Kyle does take West\u2019s advice and apologizes to her, but, and it\u2019s a really big but, adds a \u201cbut\u201d to the end of the apology, trying to justify his behavior. There are obviously a lot of issues at play between the two of them, and the show does go out of its way to see Kyle\u2019s side, or at least give him his say. We hear that his business is struggling, but, as Ciara and others point out, that\u2019s no reason to talk to Amanda like that. Kyle says that he sees the jabs she\u2019s been making at him when they replay the show, and we get a nice montage of all the instances when she cringed about Kyle behind his back. He says he\u2019s seeing those things in real-time now, and we get another montage of the most recent snubs and snide comments that Amanda\u2019s made. But, once again, that is still not a reason to say, \u201cFuck you,\u201d to your partner ever.<\/p>\n Kyle says in confessional, \u201cI can\u2019t articulate anything and I give Amanda these perfect instances of where I mess up or I say, \u2018Fuck you,\u2019 or I stay out late, but there are so many fundamental thing that are wrong with the foundation of our relationship and I\u2019m just unrelatable and no one understands what I\u2019m going through and it\u2019s very isolating.\u201d This is true. Both of them are at fault for the relationship falling apart, but Kyle\u2019s shortcomings are far more visible and egregious, which is what is adding to the isolation he, Amanda, and the house at large are feeling. Acting out because of that isolation is just going to exacerbate it. It\u2019s like putting Sriracha on your sunburn.<\/p>\n What becomes clear by the end of the episode is that being on a reality show is not a natural way to have a relationship. Just look at the jabs Amanda makes. When my husband annoys me, I talk shit about him to my friends all the time. (Sorry, Christian!) I\u2019m sure he does the same to me, but those comments stay where the Catholic Jesus intended: behind our backs. That Kyle has to see these things, and that Amanda has to see the things that Kyle did that she doesn\u2019t know about, just brings stress to a much more stressful situation. To make it even worse, you then have the whole public weighing in on who they think is right, what they think is appropriate, and whether the couple should stay together. (Guilty, guilty, and guilty.) This is a part of what Ciara was talking about last episode<\/a> when she mentioned how the public\u2019s view of her relationship with West and its racial components really affected both her and the relationship.<\/p>\n We can also look at the show itself, the power dynamics at play, and how that impacts Kymanda. When the show started, Kyle was cast and Amanda was just some girl he was hooking up with. He brought her onto the show with his friends, and she had to fight for attention both with him (imagine how isolated she felt then?) and the other housemates. Remember the 17-page email<\/a> he had to send to the house to get them to be nice to Amanda? It was always Kyle\u2019s show, and Amanda was there as his backup. That dynamic has flipped, certainly in recent years, as Kyle is older, Amanda got closer to the newer castmates who are closer to her age, and Kyle is on the outs. Now he\u2019s the one being left out and isolated (in part because of his own bad behavior against Amanda), and he probably feels like something is being taken away from him.<\/p>\n None of this, of course, is to excuse what Kyle said to Amanda, but an attempt to explain his psychology and illustrate how relationships on these shows are more doomed than Katy Perry\u2019s pop career. The same thing happens with KJ and his budding relationship with Dara. Lindsay, always working for her paycheck, asks KJ about their connection in the kitchen. She then brings up that Bailey said that Dara was in Ben\u2019s room for an hour the last time she was in the house. Bailey reportedly said that Dara went into the room wearing one outfit and left in another outfit. KJ hears this and starts to spin out, his natural anxiety getting the best of him.<\/p>\n He gets help from two places. The first is from Carl, giving him some insight from a veteran. He tells KJ that when dating someone in the house, everyone thinks it\u2019s fodder for them to talk about and that complicates the relationship because they\u2019re just trying to get to know each other and everyone is putting their little two cents in and, well, that doesn\u2019t even add up to a dollar (and certainly not a $15,000 investment in Soft Bar). KJ then goes to talk to his sisters from other misters, Ciara and Mia, and they do a little mediation with him and give him some confidence. I love the growing bond between these three, which I assume may be similar to the one he has with his sisters. I almost shed a tear when Ciara said that she would kill for him.<\/p>\n Of course, when KJ finally talks to Dara she says that it didn\u2019t happen. That she was in Ben\u2019s room because that\u2019s where she put her suitcase, and so that\u2019s why she went into the room in one outfit and left in another. A completely believable story, but because there are so many prying eyes around the house, one that Bailey totally misconstrued. I can\u2019t wait for Dara and Bailey to fight the next time they\u2019re together. (Also, Bailey is not even there and is causing drama. The mark of a true future Summer House star.)<\/p>\n