In advance of going to a wedding, Daughter Number Two messages me: Do you have any slay sunglasses I could borrow?<\/p>\n
A definition of the terms used here: \u201cSlay\u201d means cool. \u201cBorrow\u201d means if she likes them, I\u2019ll never see them again. Except on Instagram with her wearing them. <\/p>\n
I should defend, or at least explain, my daughter\u2019s actions. As one of four girls, she grew up in an atmosphere where they became instinctive devotees of the French anarchist Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, coming to the conclusion that property is indeed theft. But only in relation to clothes (and slay accessories), thus justifying extensive borrowing from each other.<\/p>\n
Over the years, there have been quite a few heated exchanges over who took what from whom, most of which were never resolved because they couldn\u2019t remember who originally acquired the disputed item; as if the clothes magically arrived by themselves, ready to be fought for. Like meat thrown in the water for sharks.<\/p>\n
I have mixed feelings about all this. I greatly admire their interest in exploring alternatives to capitalism and their commitment to recycling garments. But because they don\u2019t live with each other any more, the opportunities for pilfering have greatly reduced. Which has made me more of a target.<\/p>\n
Daughter Number Three turns up at the house, somehow having failed to notice that it\u2019s February. Dad, I\u2019m freezing. Can I borrow a jumper? I never see it again. Trousers, shirts, belts, jackets, gloves: I\u2019ve been dispossessed of all these items, sometimes with my co-operation. And this kleptomania seems to be contagious. Even Herself, who openly lusts after my cardigans, has succumbed to borrowing one occasionally. (Thankfully, her inner Blueshirt prevents her from embracing radical politics and she gives it back.)<\/p>\n
This is not all bad. I find it flattering that they like my clothes enough to want to take them from me. But it can also be profoundly dispiriting. Because if Herself or one of the girls puts on something I own, my first instinct is to give it to them. Not because I\u2019m generous. Quite the opposite. It\u2019s because every single time, without exception, every garment I have looks far better on them. They are systematically ruining all my clothes for me. And the slay sunglasses I no longer own.<\/p>\n
But, to be positive again, at least they are deriving some small amount of style inspiration from actual human beings. Not too long ago, people would choose clothes and music and films and books based on the influence of others or geography or accident or the strange sense that this cultural artefact says something to me, or about me. <\/p>\n
Now it all comes from the same place: online. The sales pitch would make this sound like the best thing ever. The digital world is all about personalisation. It will relentlessly suggest stuff that you like.<\/p>\n