The Donabate woman\u2019s care from doctors and the hospital was, she says, \u201creally good\u201d. There were also some unusual differences: \u201cThey gave us a birthday cake the night Kilian was born \u2013 we got a menu to choose from, and two cakes going home. It was kind of bizarre. I was so exhausted and spaced out.\u201d<\/p>\n
When it came to maternity leave Langran was lucky getting 12 weeks, six weeks paid and six weeks unpaid (short-term disability cover). But Langran explains each state is like a different country when it comes to leave, and her cover depended on what her employer was willing to offer. <\/p>\n
\u201cI was lucky I was working for a really nice company. They were really good to me. They gave me time off to go to my appointments.\u201d <\/p>\n
\n\u2018I always tell people, you need to go to Ireland to experience the Irish. What they do when you need them is wonderful. From people you don\u2019t know to people you know really well\u2019<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
There is no national entitlement for paid maternity leave in the US. In Louisiana, a pregnant employee is entitled to six weeks of unpaid leave and up to four months where they are disabled because of pregnancy-related issues. Many employees are eligible for 12 weeks of job-protected unpaid leave under federal law. There is no entitlement to paid antenatal appointments. This is in sharp contrast to Ireland, where women are entitled to a minimum 26 weeks of statutory paid maternity leave, 16 weeks of unpaid leave and all hospital appointment time covered. <\/p>\n
Langran\u2019s postnatal recovery was \u201cdifficult\u201d. \u201cI ended up having three epidurals and found it hard to walk. The first six weeks were a fog,\u201d she says. This period compounded the grief she experienced over her father. \u201cThe sleep deprivation made me miss Dad more \u2013 for much of the day the only person I had to talk to was non-verbal.\u201d <\/p>\n
Returning to the office just a few weeks after giving birth can be \u201creally hard mentally\u201d for some mothers, says Langran. Other mothers \u201creally leaned on family, which helped them go back to work\u201d.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhen I got to the end of six weeks, I couldn\u2019t imagine going back [to work]. I was only coming to normality. Luckily around that time my Mum arrived.<\/p>\n
\u201cOnce my Mum arrived I knew I could fall apart, now that she can pick up the pieces. If you aren\u2019t from Ireland you won\u2019t get the value of an Irish mammy. They are a breed all of their own, the greatest gift.\u201d<\/p>\n
Having her mother helped her recovery, with assistance on practical things such as meal prep and emotional support. \u201cWe were able to grieve together and it gave me confidence to keep going. So by the end of 12 weeks I was back to normal.\u201d<\/p>\n
With her leave entitlements up, Langran went back to work for \u201ca little bit\u201d when Cillian was a few months old. She struggled to find childcare, however. \u201cSome places won\u2019t take them so young. A lot of places were full or very expensive.\u201d Langran couldn\u2019t find an option close enough to home. \u201cSo I took a break from working to be home with Cillian and I\u2019d like to go back to work when he\u2019s a little older.\u201d <\/p>\n
The existence of \u201cchildcare deserts\u201d (areas of the US experiencing a critical shortage of licensed childcare) is a major issue, particularly in rural parts and majority black\/Hispanic areas. An average of 46 per cent of US children under 6 live in a childcare desert, the Center for American Progress says.<\/p>\n
Living away from home after having a baby, Langran says she missed the Irish sense of community. While there are some church groups in her area, she\u2019s not in a big city, and a lot of mothers work, so there are fewer mother-network opportunities. <\/p>\n
\u201cI always tell people, you need to go to Ireland to experience the Irish. What they do when you need them is wonderful. From people you don\u2019t know to people you know really well. I missed that sense of community and where they rally around.\u201d <\/p>\n
But she sees the timing of her son\u2019s birth as a \u201cgift\u201d and in a strange way \u201cperfect timing\u201d. \u201cIt was something for my Mum to invest time in… it just lifted eveyone\u2019s hearts when he was born.<\/p>\n
\u201cGrief is a strange thing. It catches you off guard,\u201d she says. While they celebrate every little milestone of baby Cillian\u2019s development, they are \u201ca reminder of another month without Dad\u201d. <\/p>\n
Langran is looking forward bringing Cillian home for the first time this summer. \u201cHe has every bit the personality of my Dad \u2013 so happy and cheerful. Sometimes I look at him I just see my Dad, even though the two never met.\u201d <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"While becoming a mother for the first time is wonderful, it\u2019s also a period of major upheaval and…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":641533,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_share_on_mastodon":"0"},"categories":[40],"tags":[9,10,18,13,14,2215,6,19,17,2213,11,12,15,16,5,2973,2645,12096,7,8,384],"class_list":["post-641532","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-ireland","tag-breaking-news","tag-breakingnews","tag-eire","tag-featured-news","tag-featurednews","tag-for-you","tag-headlines","tag-ie","tag-ireland","tag-irish-abroad","tag-latest-news","tag-latestnews","tag-main-news","tag-mainnews","tag-news","tag-parenting","tag-pregnancy","tag-the-juggle","tag-top-stories","tag-topstories","tag-united-states"],"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"https:\/\/pubeurope.com\/@ie\/117110196619179252","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/641532","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=641532"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/641532\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/641533"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=641532"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=641532"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=641532"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}