Saturday Night Live returned Pete Hegseth (Colin Jost) and Kash Patel (Aziz Ansari) to the cold open, this time as they cavort in a booze-filled night along with Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh (Matt Damon).<\/p>\n
Following last week\u2019s debut of Ansari as Patel<\/a>, the fact that SNL returned to the same theme this week is not a huge surprise.<\/p>\n More from Deadline<\/p>\n The opener has Hegseth arriving at Martin\u2019s Tavern, the legendary Georgetown watering hole, where he encounters Kavanaugh, still in his robe and carrying a gavel. In reality, both Hegseth and Kavanaugh faced questions in their confirmation hearings over excessive drinking.<\/p>\n \u201cHey, can I just say that we are both kicking ass right now,\u201d Damon\u2019s Kavanaugh said.<\/p>\n \u201cDude, can you believe I just, like, started a war?\u201d Jost\u2019s Hegseth said.<\/p>\n Kavanaugh responded, \u201cCan you believe I ended abortion? Your body, my choice.\u201d<\/p>\n The justice asked Hegseth, \u201cHow is the war going, by the way?\u201d<\/p>\n He responded, \u201cOh, it\u2019s totally chill. It\u2019s like me at a DWI checkpoint. It completely blew over.\u201d<\/p>\n The skit went on to riff on the Supreme Court\u2019s recent decision gutting the Voting Rights Act, setting off a wave of redistricting in Southern red states to draw out Democrats. In Tennessee, a Black majority district covering Memphis was carved up, raising the possibility that it will be represented by a Republican from elsewhere in the state.<\/p>\n At one point, Kavanaugh held up a drawing of an irregular, horizonal shape. \u201cIt\u2019s the new voting district that I approved in Tennessee,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n Then, he corrected himself. \u201cActually, no, that\u2019s a field sobriety test. They told me to draw a circle.\u201d<\/p>\n The two were joined by Patel, who proudly displayed his \u201cown FBI bourbon with my name on it. Yes, somehow this is a real thing that I, the FBI director has made.\u201d The Atlantic reported<\/a> this week that Patel has traveled with a supply of his own personalized branded bourbon, including an image of the FBI shield.<\/p>\n Ansari\u2019s Patel said, \u201cI bring my own alcohol to bars because sometimes they think I\u2019m a kid with a fake ID. They say, no adult would make this face in official photos.\u201d Ansari then bulged his eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019re all living the American dream. I\u2019m the first person in my family to go to college \u2026 parties, many years after graduating.\u201d<\/p>\n Kavanaugh then asked him, \u201cIs that rumor true that you make everybody in the FBI take a polygraph?\u201d<\/p>\n Patel responded, \u201cNo, I told them to make a graphy of everyone in the FBI who is Polly. My girlfriend wants to open up our relationship. Yeah. She says she wants to bring other dudes into the bedroom and for me to stay in the living room.\u201d<\/p>\n Kavanaugh then told Hegseth and Patel a secret.<\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019re gonna let Trump do a third term,\u201d as the two screamed out wildly.<\/p>\n \u201cI thought that was unconstitutional,\u201d Hegseth said.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, it was, but Trump found the original and at the end, he wrote, \u2018Psych! We\u2019re going to live forever.’\u201d<\/p>\n Best of Deadline<\/p>\n Sign up for Deadline’s Newsletter<\/a>. For the latest news, follow us on Facebook<\/a>, Twitter<\/a>, and Instagram<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Saturday Night Live returned Pete Hegseth (Colin Jost) and Kash Patel (Aziz Ansari) to the cold open, this…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":64930,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_share_on_mastodon":"0"},"categories":[120],"tags":[33444,3428,9217,6429,37949,18],"class_list":["post-64929","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-pete-hegseth","tag-aziz-ansari","tag-brett-kavanaugh","tag-colin-jost","tag-kash-patel","tag-matt-damon","tag-pete-hegseth"],"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"https:\/\/pubeurope.com\/@people\/116550504439754830","error":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64929","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=64929"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64929\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/64930"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=64929"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=64929"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/people\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=64929"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}