A south east London football team is challenging long-held taboos by putting men’s mental health front and centre.
On Thursday, May 29, charity teams Wandering Crows and Matters of Men will go head-to-head in a special fundraising match at Charlton Athletics’ iconic ground, The Valley.
The free, family-friendly event will not only bring grassroots football back into the spotlight but raise vital funds and awareness for mental health charity Samaritans.
Paul Ray, chairman and founder of Matters of Men, told the News Shopper: “There’s a lot of charity teams around south London, but we thought there’s a stigma with men’s silence.
The ‘Matters of Men’ football team (Image: Paul Ray)
“They can’t talk to people about their issues or worries because they don’t want the micky taking out of them.”
It’s this very stigma that Paul – who grew up in Lee Green and now lives in Grimsby – has made it his mission to tackle.
After stepping away from playing grassroots football, he and a group of friends formed Matters of Men three years ago.
Paul Ray is the chairman for Matters of Men (Image: Paul Ray)
What started as a love for the game quickly evolved into a heartfelt campaign to confront the silent battles many men face.
With the tragic loss of friends and family members to suicide, choosing Samaritans as their charity partner was a deeply personal decision.
Paul explained: “We’ve lost a few friends on the way and the one organisation that doesn’t get recognised as much is Samaritans.
The charity match will be held on May 29 (Image: Paul Ray)
“This organisation is there to listen to you – not to judge you, know you and sometimes it’s easier for people to open up to someone they don’t know.”
The match, which kicks off at 12pm during the half-term break, will also feature donation buckets, limited-edition programmes, and media coverage including a documentary team focusing on the mental health message behind the campaign.
“We’ve got photographers and a videographer coming down to film the game,” Paul added.
“Some people will open up and chat about their background – we’re doing a lot to raise awareness.”
The game will be hosted at Charlton Athletic’s grounds (Image: Paul Ray)
But for Paul, the campaign is more than a one-day event – it’s a reflection of lived experience, ongoing support, and the power of community.
He added: “I’ve gone through a lot of personal ups and downs – I lost a child in 2007 and didn’t think my life would go anywhere.
“If it’s just one person who calls Samaritans through our work, then we’ve done our job.”
Matters of Men is as much about creating a space for emotional connection as it is about football.
Paul is tackling the taboo around men’s mental health (Image: Paul Ray)
“We wanted to play football in the right environment – it’s competitive but a bit of a laugh,” Paul said.
“Matters of men is for things that matter for men – gambling, loss, going through addiction.
“Men don’t talk about their trauma.
“I didn’t have any counselling which was probably the wrong thing to do.
“Over the time Samaritan’s has helped me. It’s driving me to help open people’s eyes.”
Paul Ray (pictured) (Image: Paul Ray)
Paul told the News Shopper that he and his teammates stay connected through a WhatsApp group, offering each other a sense of brotherhood and support whenever it’s needed.
He explained: “We might not speak every day, but we jump on and send a funny meme in it.
“If someone doesn’t reply in a week or so I usually drop them a separate message to see if they’re ok.
“Unfortunately, a lot of people have gambling issues right now – it’s because of the current world we live in.
The team is clear that this isn’t about publicity.
“Everyone is on board – we’re not playing because there’s a camera or we’re in Charlton.
“We want to break the stigma that men can’t talk without looking weak.”
The May 29 match is open to all, and the team is encouraging anyone in the area to come along, support the cause, and help shine a light on men’s mental health.
For more information or support, you can follow @mattersofmenfc on social media.
If you’re struggling, you can also contact Samaritans for free on 116 123.