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When dating is challenging to the point that people are paying $10,000 for coaches or just giving up, adding a life-altering weight-loss medication into the mix can complicate things further. GLP-1 drugs put serious strain on some long-term relationships, according to a report from the New York Times earlier this year. There’s less information out there about how the shots figure into single people’s lives, outside of Reddit forums where uncoupled GLP-1 users trade war stories about looking for love (or even just sex) as they lose weight. Not exactly things you want to share early on when dating someone.

A 2024 poll estimates that 12 percent of people in the U.S. have used a GLP-1 drug (in addition to Ozempic, the other big-name brands are Wegovy, Zepbound, and Mounjaro). GLP-1s can cost well over a $1,000 a month and lead to a reduction in body size of over 20 percent. Some single people taking these drugs report feeling pressured to tell new matches that they’re on long-term medication or otherwise reveal details about their health that they don’t want to share. That can be harder to hide when you have a noticeably small appetite, one of the hallmarks of getting these shots. GLP-1s also diminish your interest in drinking, meaning a lot more sober dates. That might all sound fine enough, but there’s a significant list of potential side effects that are far less pleasant, the most common being nausea, diarrhea, constipation, and other gastrointestinal issues.

Along with those practicalities come emotional adjustments, like the mental long division of experiencing fatphobia from a new vantage, reckoning with changes to both your body and body image, and scrutinizing every different response to your updated profile pictures on the apps. To get a better sense of what that’s meant for people looking for love, three women on Ozempic told us what dating on the drug has been like so far — for better and for worse.

I had never pursued weight loss before GLP-1 medications. I was a class III obese person until last year, when I heard about celebrities using Ozempic and decided to try it myself. When I started taking semaglutide, there were a lot of physical effects I didn’t consider. Like how my clothes wouldn’t fit anymore, or that I would lose two and a half shoe sizes (at this point I’m spending a ton of money on clothes and yet they still don’t fit), or that my hair would fall out, or that losing almost 150 pounds would dramatically change how my face looked.

I didn’t have any issues dating before I lost weight. I was a cute fat person, and I got everything I wanted. Now, the dudes who I think are superhot are not having it anymore; they’re not into me at all. It makes me feel like I looked better before.

Still, I hit the apps quite hard in January, and recently, I went on a date every single night of the week. The medication has made finding someone to hang out with long term more challenging in unexpected ways. I’ve been sober since I started taking Ozempic. I’m happy to have a Diet Coke and to go on dinner dates, but it seems to come up as an issue pretty often. People automatically assume I have a substance-abuse problem. They always ask, “Are you ever going to drink again?”

When I was navigating the world as a fat person, people could see that I was fat. Now, people can’t tell unless I tell them first. I’ve had conversations where men said rude or cruel things about others’ weight, or that they would never date someone fat.

One time, a guy I was seeing came to my apartment and saw framed photos of me when I was bigger. We’d never spoken about my weight loss. Right after, he broke things off without any explanation, but my theory is that it’s because he saw me at a larger size. My feeling is that many people feel a stigma not only toward fat people, but also former fat people, and former fat people who lost weight on a GLP-1 drug. It’s a lot to wrap my head around.

I don’t know that I’ve ever thought about an ideal relationship at any weight. I’ve always dated just to make out with hot guys, which is what I’m doing now. I’m not looking for something that I feel is missing. I’m not optimistic or otherwise about finding something in the future, because I haven’t lost anything.

I didn’t date before I started taking Ozempic two years ago. I wasn’t happy with how I looked and had some unrelated mental-health issues I wanted to work out in therapy, and the men who showed interest were frankly not what I was looking for or attracted to. Once I lost 80 pounds and made significant emotional progress, I finally felt ready to make a dating profile. I met my boyfriend of 1.5 years within three months, and we live together now.

When I got on the apps, it was exciting to get attention that I hadn’t before. Previously, I felt invisible — or, at least, I tried to be invisible, because I was afraid that, otherwise, I’d get attention in the form of contempt and disgust, which I thought was how men think about larger women. It’s certainly better to have people smile and be polite to you than it is when they treat you with derision because of your size.

I told my boyfriend that I take GLP-1 medication early on in our relationship. When I started dating, I made a very active decision that, even though I’m thin now, if anyone had an attitude of being negative or rude about fat people, I didn’t want to date that person. The guy I’m seeing now didn’t behave that way, but I still wanted to be clear about my values. It was really important to me that my boyfriend knew that I was overweight before and that he wasn’t contemptuous of fat people — or of me.

When I explained that my weight had changed, he told me I should be proud of myself. He’s accepting of how I lost weight. My medication is right in our refrigerator. He has never struggled with his weight and is super-fit, so I don’t think he understands how difficult it is for me without Ozempic. I think he hopes that, eventually, I’ll stop taking it — but that he doesn’t necessarily care too much, as long as I continue to look the same as he’s known me to look.

Even though he has never said anything to this effect, I strongly suspect he wouldn’t date me if I was still fat. We’ve never talked about it. Anyway, I’m not about to find out, given the health benefits I’ve had. The cost is outrageous, but I’d be happy to stay on Ozempic for the rest of my life.

I started taking Ozempic two years ago because I have polycystic ovarian syndrome. As part of my condition, I’ve struggled since I was 16 with weight and hormonal issues. This has changed my life immensely. Getting on the medication wasn’t about dating; it was about health. But I did think that it would give me a better experience of romantic relationships. I thought, I’m feeling great — there’s going to be all these opportunities out there for me.

The reality has been the opposite, and it’s dejecting. It’s probably not what most people would expect: You think you drop weight, then dating becomes easier. But at 35, I’m not looking for casual hookups. I want to invest time and make serious connections. In many ways, I feel like I was more successful dating before I lost weight.

The way I perceive it: Guys thought that because I was bigger, I’d accept whatever came my way. Now that I’ve lost 50 pounds, I don’t match with those men anymore. It’s like they think, I actually have to put the effort in. I have to be a decent person, as opposed to my being an easy target. I’ve matched with guys who have told me, “This isn’t going to work. You’re too far out of my league.” One was very hung up on looks and even compared our situation to Beauty and the Beast. Many seem to have real confidence issues. It’s as if looks are all they think about.

The medication has also affected the dates I do go on. Men have this misconception that I don’t eat a lot because I’m putting on a demure act, rather than the fact that I have a ridiculously small appetite. It’s like the ‘I’ll just have a salad’ trope, in their opinion. At one point, my ex thought I had an eating disorder. In reality, the medication removes a lot of the desire to eat, and I had to have my gallbladder removed as a result of major weight loss. These aren’t exactly things you want to share early on when dating someone.

My brother says that just because you’re smaller it doesn’t mean you’re going to get a lot of dates. He has a point. But I did think dating would be better and not bring me to where I was in February, when I gave up on it altogether. I want someone to see me as a person, not just how I look, and it got exhausting. I don’t plan to stop taking the drugs. But I do feel like I’m going to become an old maid who’s single, living her best life, and traveling the world.

*For privacy reasons, McElroy’s first name has been changed and Bella’s last name has been omitted.

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