The Carbuncle Awards, run by Urban Realm, Scotland’s oldest architectural magazine, once again crowned a ‘winner’ for the country’s worst town in terms of urban planning. 

This year, the unwanted trophy went to Port Glasgow. Previous ‘winners’ include Aberdeen (2015), New Cumnock (2013), Linwood (2011), John O’Groats (2010), Glenrothes (2009), Coatbridge (2007) and Cumbernauld (2005).

Spot the pattern? The places singled out are overwhelmingly working class communities and have long been neglected or side-lined in national investment priorities. 

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Of course, it is right to point out we shouldn’t have to live in neglected environments, and we must demand better. But selling it as a competition for the ‘ugliest’ place in Scotland opens the floor to make jokes and is more mean-spirited than constructive. 

I live in Port Glasgow and I’m proud to tell you it’s really not that bad! In fact, it’s actually an unexpected but wonderful place to call home.

My partner and I first moved here because I needed a more affordable Glasgow address for work (it’s just 27 minutes on the fast train into town) and we wanted more space than the city can provide. But five years later we’re still here! 

Like anywhere else in Scotland, the Port has its challenges but it also has its strengths. It’s an incredibly welcoming town, there’s a bunch of open space which nature thrives in and our community boards are packed full of local events to enjoy together. The 250th celebrations were enjoyed at the packed events I went to. 

There’s a reason Coronation Park is the spot for wedding pictures in the area. The view over the Clyde can take your breath away. Nobody complains about Falkirk’s Kelpies (or their spend) so why take aim at the ‘Skelpies’? It’s a quirky landmark that gives people a reason to stop. And sure, there’s a motorway behind it, but that was never really an Inverclyde council decision was it?

(Image: George Munro)
Urban Realm claims the retail park is “sucking life from the town centre”, but it’s only 0.2 miles from the High Street. It’s accessible for pedestrians, full of useful shops, and gives our aging residents independence, with a regular bus service serving both the park, the town and retail park.

And let’s be honest: do councils really care about High Streets? No, they’re invested in retail parks.  The difference here is that, unlike most places, Port Glasgow’s is integrated into the town, not marooned on the outskirts and dependent on car access. 

Then there’s the Clune Park Estate. The Carbuncles called the demolition of the B-listed school and churn an “egregious loss”. But anyone who lives here knows the reality, some structures cannot and should not be preserved simply for the sake of appearances.

The church shut in 1997, the school in 2008, and residents drifted away from a neighbourhood built for shipyard workers once the work was gone. That’s the real issue. 

And don’t even start me on Urban Realm editor John Glenday declaring: “Port Glasgow is a town of squandered potential” in a press release. That sensational statement gets attention but it hurts! 

What gets missed in awards like this is the lived experience. Reducing towns to punchlines does little to inspire improvement. Instead of ridiculing, we should be asking: what resources and investment could actually support places like Port Glasgow, Linwood or Glenrothes? 

I’m not the person to ask, but I am the person who lives here. And what I can tell you is that Port Glasgow is more than its stereotypes.

Mocking communities doesn’t build them up. Real investment and respect do. The Carbuncle Awards might hand out shame, but those of us who actually call these towns home know there’s nothing shameful about them. 

So the next time someone decides to run a competition to crown Scotland’s ‘worst’, maybe they should spend a little more time in the places they’re ridiculing. They might just find out what I did in Port Glasgow. It’s not a carbuncle, but an affordable, well-connected place to live with space, community pride and a view over The Clyde worth celebrating.