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Everyone needs a shoulder to cry on. Community spaces are a great way to seek support for your mental health.
Sonny Ferretti is an actor who cares so much about the mental health of others, he decided to diversify and begin working as a mental health practitioner.
One of his current projects involves setting up a network of creatives to support each other. We caught up with him to find out more.
The nativity play was his starting point
Like many actors, the nativity play was the starting point for Sonny.
Sonny Ferretti
He says, “I can still remember the costume they gave me; it was a full-length burgundy piece and came with a hat with tiny mirrors on it. I thought it was the coolest thing ever.
“The performance bug started there. And never left.”
Acting allows him to express himself
He went to drama school at Italia Conti in 2004 and has been treading the boards ever since. And he loves the “many stages of the acting process.”
He adds, “The audition process really excites me; being given a completely different character to dissect and discover, the nervousness of being in the room.”
“You can be one kind of person going into the theatre, cinema, etc, watch a performance, and you can leave a completely different person…”
Likewise, the rehearsal process excites him, and when a performance is transformative for the audience, he knows he has done his job well. He says:
“You can be one kind of person going into the theatre, cinema, etc, watch a performance, and you can leave a completely different person.
“Isn’t that crazy? It can literally change who you are in a few hours. That has certainly happened to me.
“Not often, but when it happens, it’s indescribable.”
Mental health in the competitive acting industry
We asked what he noticed about mental health in the competitive industry.
He told us: “Oh, blimey! Where do I start? It’s funny, whenever I talk to people about being an actor and working in mental health, they often talk about the rejection and how tough it must be.”
“If you’ve been auditioned and never hear back, it has been the most damaging part of my mental health journey”
He adds: “Yes, it can be difficult, particularly if it’s something you would love to do or pays well, but for me, that’s just a natural part of the job.
“I give myself 24 hours to sulk and I’m back to it.” He expands: “But the more pernicious, the more destructive part of the industry is not hearing yes or no from an audition.
“Granted, casting can’t be expected to reply to you for every submission, but if you’ve been auditioned and never hear back, it has been the most damaging part of my mental health journey.”
Finding his tribe
Mental health community group
So how does an actor end up working in this ever-growing field? Sonny says: “A mate of mine is a Mental Health First Aid instructor, and when I met him in 2022, I had no idea what it was. Absolutely none. The more I found out, the more I felt, ‘I have unequivocally found my tribe’. A community of people who care about others’ wellbeing and safety.”
He adds: ”I learnt more about it and, coupled with the years of therapy I had had by that point, I thought, ‘I know the industry needs this kind of training’.
“I took about a year out of the industry and focused on what would make me happy – or as happy as possible.”
He expands: “After that time, my love for the acting world hadn’t gone away, but my intense love for it had, so I set out to become an MHFA instructor and to aim predominantly towards the Arts.”
“I was so passionately driven to ensure that people don’t arrive at the dark places I have”
During lockdown, I created a podcast that spoke to creatives about their mental health called ‘My Sh**ty Actor Boyfriend‘ and was also passionately driven to ensure that people don’t arrive at the dark places I have.”
Positive feedback
Sonny told us about some of the positive feedback he’s received: “I got a text message late one Sunday night from a delegate I had trained a week or so beforehand.
“I had had a tough weekend and was getting into bed, and this person messaged me out of the blue to say thank you again for the course, but to also tell me what had happened to him and another delegate the night before.”
He adds, “They had walked past a man on his own in a bar, crying. Initially, they walked past, but thanks to the training, they stopped, went back, and asked him if he was OK.
“They spent 30 minutes with him and found out that his Nan was in hospital and he was very upset. It didn’t fix the problem this man was having, but that’s not the point. This man felt less alone and was comforted by two complete strangers who just wanted to listen.”
Sonny’s next project is working with the theatre and community hub 53two, and he tells me more. “I can’t put into words how excited I am about my next project with 53two. This has always been a place of community, fun and zero judgment. Not just the staff, but the patrons too. For about a year, I’ve wanted to do something for the creative community in/around Manchester and knew this was the place to do it.”
‘Side by side: Creative Minds’
He adds: “On Monday, 3rd November, I am starting ’Side by Side: Creative Minds’, a free peer-to-peer support group at 53two specifically for creatives. Whether you’re an actor, musician, drag queen, director, OnlyFans model, or whoever, this is the space for you. A space with zero judgement to talk and share openly about how you’re feeling.”
He expands: “Whether it’s to do with the state of the world at the moment, money problems, your mental health, etc, or if you’d prefer to join, but not talk/share straight away – we’re here for you.
“The freelance life can be unrelentingly brutal in all sorts of ways, and I want to provide a resource, completely free, smack bang in the centre of Manchester.”
Please click this link for more info and sign-up details.
Advice for someone afraid to open up
When someone is struggling, everyone says talk.
“It’s totally OK to be nervous about sharing how you feel”
But what advice would Sonny give to someone who is afraid to blurt everything out?
He says, “Unless you want to, don’t feel pressured to blurt everything out. It’s totally OK to be nervous about sharing how you feel.
“I’ve known people for over 20 years and am still cautious about sharing. Take your time with it. Don’t feel you need to share everything all at once.
“Finding a space or a person whom you trust is key. Will that person really listen to you without judgment or advice? Will they give you the space you need to talk uninterrupted? Will they listen in an empathetic and compassionate way?”
He expands: “Maybe tell them what your expectations are from the chat. It would mean a lot if you would hear me out without advice, as that won’t be helpful. This is a big step for me, and I’m scared about sharing”. If you only want to share about one subject, stick to that. Set a clear boundary as to what you’re comfortable with and respect it.”
How does he take care of himself?
To protect his own well-being, Sonny has learned to switch off. He stepped away from the news when it began to affect his mood. These days, his happy places are the gym, a badminton court and, of course, the ultimate mental health cleanser: Judge Judy.
“Judge Judy has my heart,” he says with a grin.
If you need urgent help
If you or anyone you know is struggling, see the helpline here.
Glenn is a freelance journalist and film and media tutor who loves theatre, gigs and cinema. His second home is HOME and he can usually be found sitting in the stalls somewhere enjoying something live on Manchester’s vibrant arts scene.
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