LOTTIE RYAN believes her weekly podcast with her sister, Bonnie, has brought them closer.

“She’s in Brooklyn, and I’m in Dublin,” says the 40-year-old podcaster and broadcaster. “But bizarrely, considering we’re on different continents, the fact we’re scheduling time to chat every week means we’re communicating more regularly, which is great for our relationship.”

She is the eldest of Gerry and Morah Ryan’s five children, and she says her family has always been close-knit: “Losing dad in 2010 bonded us together even more. Only we six understood what we were going through, so we closed ranks and went through it together.”

Many happy years preceded that loss. Ryan describes the home she grew up in in Clontarf as “a mad house, in the best possible way”.

Her parents had Lottie, Rex, Bonnie, Elliott, and Babette over the course of 15 years: “We were like the Brady Bunch. The dynamic was wild, with kids, teenagers, and young adults under one roof.”

Lottie and Bonnie Ryan in 1992.Lottie and Bonnie Ryan in 1992.

These days, Ryan’s podcasts and regular radio and TV work have established her as a bubbly and outgoing personality. However, the 2020 Dancing with the Stars winner says people would be surprised to learn how shy she was as a child.

“I was painfully shy,” she says. “Mum and dad would ask me to do things like pay for items in the supermarket just to get me to interact with people. I’m still introverted in my personal life. I’ve never been one for parties or socialising with big groups.

“My younger siblings aren’t like that at all. They’d talk to a brick wall if it could talk back to them. I’m in awe of their confidence.”

Yet this shy young girl discovered that she loved the stage. Her paternal grandmother, Maureen, owned a costume shop above Dublin’s Olympia Theatre, and Ryan says: “I spent my childhood there, surrounded by actors, dancers, and performers, adoring the theatrics and energy of it all.”

Her parents encouraged her interest in performance, enrolling her for dance and drama classes from the age of four.

“I think they thought it would help me come out of my shell,” she says. “From then on, I loved performing, and I think it was the first thing I ever felt I was good at.”

School days

School was more problematic. She struggled with dyslexia in primary school. However, because both her parents were also dyslexic, they spotted it early and got her extra help.

“They used to be called thick at school and didn’t want that to happen to me,” says Ryan. “So someone used to come to our house to give me after-school classes.”

Her parents also told her dyslexia was “a gift and not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. They always said that we all get to the same destination. Some of us just have to take different routes. And who knows what we might come across along the way?”

Ryan was bullied in her first year of secondary school and eventually moved schools. She now says that “being a teenager sucks. It took me a while to find my clique, and when I did, it was great. 

But before that, there were times I’d spend lunch sitting in the toilet to avoid the bullies.

Her parents were a huge support during those times. Her father would drive her to school and sit in the car with her until just before the bell rang. 

“He had a show from 9am to 12pm, but he didn’t want me to be by myself waiting for class to begin. Knowing that I was important to some people gave me a feeling of value and strength.”

These days, Ryan stands up to bullies: “If I spot them, I call them out. Whether it’s in real life or on social media, I won’t put up with it, especially if I see it happening to family or friends.”

When it came to her career, Ryan says: “I always knew where I was going.”

She studied media and television in Coláiste Dhúlaigh and Griffith College in Dublin, and afterwards moved to New York, where she worked as a runner on CBS’s The Good Life.

In her early 20s at the time, she remembers feeling “desperately homesick. Coming from such a noisy household, the silence took a lot of getting used to”.

Now that she has her own son — Wolf, who’s five in July — Ryan is trying to pass on the values and lessons she learned from her parents. “I always felt I had the cool parents,” she says.

“Ours was the house everyone came to for sleepovers and parties. Mum was beautiful, stylish, and bohemian with cool make-up, shades, and deadly outfits.

“Dad was my best friend, counsellor, and confidant. I could talk to them about anything. We always had an honest, open relationship and candid conversations with no judgement.”

Lottie Ryan says people would be surprised to learn how shy she was as a child.Lottie Ryan says people would be surprised to learn how shy she was as a child.

She hopes to have that relationship with Wolf.

“I want him to know he can come to me,” she says. “No matter if it’s good, bad, or ugly, I’ll always have his back. I also want him to have some of the traditions we had growing up. 

“Spending New Year’s Eve together, the summer holidays we took — those were important milestones for us five and mum and dad, and I’d love for him to have those memories too.

“But most of all, I want him to have the self-belief and confidence to live a life that makes him happy, which is what my mum and dad wanted for me too.”

  • No One Else Will Listen is a podcast where listeners get to eavesdrop on Lottie and Bonnie’s weekly FaceTime catch-ups