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In the words of the old song, they’ve been together now for 25 years, and usually it doesn’t seem a day too long. Phil the cheeky charmer, Kirstie the no-nonsense head girl – the partnership is one of the most successful on the box. 

But in the first episode of a new series of Love It or List It, the pair seemed to come the closest they have ever been to falling out on screen – and it happened in East Renfrewshire.

Julia and Simon were the couple billed as having the stay-or-go argument. In a series first, “serial house shopper” Simon was the one keen to move. And Julia? “We’ve done six house moves in 10 years. Please don’t make me move again,” she said.

The family home in the village of Waterfoot was a four-bed detached, bought when they had one child. There were now four children, plus Julia and Simon.

Both running their own businesses from home, the couple had already spent a “substantial” amount trying to make the house work, but to no avail. The hallway was still a “roundabout”, and there was one family bathroom with no bath. Julia was convinced, however, that this house, with its large back garden, was their “forever home”. 

Enter Kirstie and Phil. All was well on the drive up, with Phil quizzing his chum on her knowledge of Scottish property phrases. “Gaff” was too easy, she was half right with “flitting”, and wholly correct about Phil’s linguistic skills: “I don’t think our Scottish friends are going to thank you for that accent,” she said.

Phil thought the house itself was lovely, but couldn’t work with the number of people; Kirstie, however, thought it was eminently doable, and therein lay the spat. Phil had a budget of £650k to find a new place; Kirstie had £150k to renovate a house already valued at £500k. 

“Don’t spend too much money on this house,” said an unusually adamant Phil.

“I’m not going to spend too much money,” Kirstie batted back. 

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Okay, so it was hardly Burton and Taylor going at it in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, but there was a definite tension in the air. “Mum and Dad” were arguing, and we didn’t like it.

Kirstie ploughed ahead with an extension, and Phil took the couple on a property hunt. The first stop was Jackton, where a five-bed new build was on offer for over £550k. They liked the turnkey condition, but the house was overlooked by neighbouring properties.

A detached villa in East Kilbride, offers over £620k, was huge and well turned out, but Julia wanted more character. For his last roll of the dice, Phil took the pair to Paisley and a detached Victorian villa with a modern two-storey extension.

Phil said it was one of the nicest houses he had filmed in. It was stunning, but would it persuade the couple to up sticks once more?

See for yourself by catching up on Channel 4 streaming. Enough to say harmony was restored, and all was right in the property world once more.