\n\t\t\t\t\tA reader wants to take \u00a3300-\u00a3400 of her mum’s pension income to help cover her bills as they have increased since she took her in, but she feels bad\t\t\t\t\t <\/p>\n
In our weekly series, readers can email in with any financial dilemma and enter the Money Moral Maze<\/a>.<\/p>\n Are your friends racking up big drinks tabs and then trying to split the bill equally? Is your partner overspending on your joint account? No matter your dilemma, email in anonymously, and The i Paper\u2019s money and business team will do our best to answer.<\/p>\n This week\u2019s dilemma can be found below \u2013 email us at money@inews.co.uk<\/a> with yours.<\/p>\n Dilemma<\/p>\n My 78-year-old mum moved in with us two years ago after a fall made it clear she could no longer live alone.<\/p>\n We did look at care homes<\/a> or other care options, but the cost was eye-watering \u2013 around \u00a31,200 a week in our area \u2013 and she was heartbroken at the idea. So, we offered to have her live with us.<\/p>\n It has worked, mostly. She has a small annexe, we help with washing and medication, and we do most of the cooking. But it is a big emotional and financial strain.<\/p>\n I have had to cut my hours at work, and my husband and I have noticed an increase in our bills \u2013 food, heating, water \u2013 especially during winter. We are definitely worse off than before, even without childcare costs<\/a>, now our two kids are older.<\/p>\n Mum gets a state pension, plus a small private pension that brings her income to about \u00a31,000 a month.<\/p>\n At the moment, she keeps it all. I have been wondering if it is unreasonable to ask for \u00a3300-400 a month towards household costs.<\/p>\n That is still a huge saving on what she would have spent in a care home, and I would not keep it for myself; it would actually go into a separate account for bills and maybe a cleaner or some respite care.<\/p>\n I feel so guilty, though, even thinking about it. She is my mum and she looked after me growing up.<\/p>\n I do not want her to feel like a burden or that she is paying to be in her own family\u2019s home. What should I do?<\/p>\n Emily Braeger, The i Paper\u2019s money reporter, replies<\/p>\n I am glad you wrote in because this is such a relatable dilemma \u2013 one I think a lot of people are quietly grappling with.<\/p>\n