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During her opening monologue on Jimmy Kimmel Live<\/a> guest host <\/strong>Tiffany Haddish<\/a> matched her qualifications with that of President Donald Trump<\/a> to see if she has what it takes to be president. <\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve got all the qualifications to be president,\u201d she said, before listing the three things she has in common with Trump. \u201cI\u2019m rich, I\u2019ve been arrested a few times, and I always say crazy shit.\u201d<\/p>\n She then noted one sometimes overlooked qualification that both she and the president share. <\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019ve had an actor as president, a reality host president, but now it\u2019s time to elect a comedian,\u201d she said. \u201cFinally, a president who\u2019s funny on purpose, most of the time,\u201d HuffPost<\/a> reports. <\/p>\n Haddish then had Kimmel\u2019s longtime comedy partner, Guillermo Rodriguez, bring out a campaign-style lectern to unveil her platform that includes using old gift cards as an acceptable means of tax payments. <\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019re gonna run this country, this government, like a company,\u201d Haddish said. \u201cAnd that company is Sizzler.\u201d<\/p>\n She also noted that she would be looking to add pastrami to Subway\u2019s menu, using delivery robots as sex toys and credit scores on all dating profiles. <\/p>\n \u201cIf you can\u2019t handle your business, you ain\u2019t touching my business,\u201d she said. <\/p>\n She also noted that she will be tough on crime.<\/p>\n \u201cI also will make it a crime to show up on time to a dinner party. Who in the hell is walking into my house at 6 o\u2019clock for a 6 o\u2019clock dinner? White people, that\u2019s who,\u201d she continued.<\/p>\n But her biggest declaration was based on a simple idea based on America not being the world police. <\/p>\n \u201cMy campaign is built around a very simple idea: America, mind your own damn business,\u201d she said. \u201cDoesn\u2019t that sound nice?\u201d <\/p>\n Haddish isn\u2019t the only recent critic of Trump, see Chicago\u2019s Mayor\u2019s recent comment below.<\/p>\n