{"id":391744,"date":"2025-09-02T11:15:13","date_gmt":"2025-09-02T11:15:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/391744\/"},"modified":"2025-09-02T11:15:13","modified_gmt":"2025-09-02T11:15:13","slug":"when-an-inheritance-comes-with-stipulations-they-want-control-from-the-grave","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/391744\/","title":{"rendered":"When an inheritance comes with stipulations: \u2018They want control from the grave\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"

Open this photo in gallery:<\/a><\/p>\n

BRO Vector\/iStockPhoto \/ Getty Images<\/p>\n

In his more-than-30-year career, financial adviser Colin White has seen many \u201cdark and twisted\u201d family disputes over how adult children or grandchildren use the money they\u2019re inheriting.<\/p>\n

After spending a lifetime accumulating wealth or building a business, some parents and grandparents may be tempted to gift it to their beneficiaries with rules as to how the funds can be used. <\/p>\n

\u201cThe desire of one generation to be in control over another is very, very common, and it leads to a lot of family discord,\u201d said Mr. White, portfolio manager and chief executive officer of Verecan Capital Management in Halifax.<\/p>\n

An estimated $1-trillion of wealth is expected to change hands between Canadian baby boomers and their children between 2023 and 2026 \u2013 inheritances that can be life-changing for many young people. But financial advisers warn that being overly controlling with inheritances can lead to long-term fractures in the family and can damage the beneficiary\u2019s ability to manage money.<\/p>\n

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Mary Clements Evans, a certified financial planner and behavioural finance expert in Pennsylvania, said she\u2019s seen a fair share of her clients using money to manipulate their children or grandchildren into decisions they would not have otherwise made. <\/p>\n

Some examples include stipulating that they\u2019ll only pay for their education if they attend a specific university or a certain program, requiring them to purchase a specific house or even a certain car. She has also seen rules stipulating that the beneficiary can\u2019t use the funds for contributions to a political party the parent doesn\u2019t like. <\/p>\n

\u201cThey want control from the grave,\u201d Ms. Clements Evans said, though she noted that putting money in trust for a child\u2019s general education or health care costs, or setting rules that allow a certain amount to be withdrawn per year to ensure the money lasts a long time, is \u201creasonable\u201d and can be a form of financial education.<\/p>\n

Mr. White said he has seen some clients offer money to a child or grandchild, but only if they use it to purchase a home. Although the clients\u2019 intentions are good, the belief that home ownership is the be all and end all for creating wealth, \u201ccan be terrible financial advice,\u201d he said. <\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019re not allowing the next generation to figure things out in the current environment \u2026 [and] the next generation has to take on all those responsibilities.\u201d<\/p>\n

He said the desire to exert control often comes from one of two places. The most well-meaning is a feeling on the part of the gifter that they know better than the next generation about managing wealth, particularly after having lived through major economic events such as the Great Depression or the 2008 financial collapse.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn all those situations various strategies would have worked, but they might not now,\u201d Mr. White said. \u201cThey want to protect the kids from making bad decisions and mistakes, as they see it.\u201d<\/p>\n

The \u201cless altruistic\u201d reason is the belief the next generation will be foolish with the family wealth or business. \u201cThat version of it is, \u2018I created all this money \u2026 so you\u2019re going to do it my way because you didn\u2019t earn this,\u2019\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

Kristine Anderson, founder of estate and family law firm Fern Law in Toronto, said trust structures allow for a great degree of control over how the beneficiary can use the money. <\/p>\n

Many wealthy families will set up a family trust, list their children as beneficiaries and name three family members as the trustees \u2013 such as the mother, father and an aunt or uncle \u2013 who have a \u201clot of discretion\u201d over whether to release money to the children, Ms. Anderson said. <\/p>\n

\u201cThey can be as generous or as particular as they want, and there\u2019s not a whole heck of a lot the beneficiary can do,\u201d she said. However, in some rare cases the trustees could be considered to be breaching their fiduciary duty if they refuse to give money to one of the beneficiaries for \u201cunreasonable\u201d reasons.<\/p>\n

In the case of trusts established after the parent or grandparent has died, the structures can have detailed instructions over how the money should be used, and can even extend well into the beneficiary\u2019s adulthood. Ms. Anderson said she\u2019s seen trusts that stretch until a child is 70, or for the rest of their lives.<\/p>\n

She noted there are some options for a beneficiary to get out of a trust\u2019s restrictive rule. For example, if a young adult wants to go to art school but the trust only allows for the disbursement of education funds if they enroll in a STEM program, Ms. Anderson said they could ask for court approval, and argue that releasing the funds would meet the basic underlying purpose of the trust.<\/p>\n

In Ms. Anderson\u2019s experience, those highly strict disbursement rules more often occur when someone is leaving funds for a family member they\u2019re concerned about, such as a child who struggles with addiction or isn\u2019t gainfully employed and has been overly reliant on parental help well into their adulthood. <\/p>\n

\u201cI think of it as a positive thing that the parent or grandparent, whoever\u2019s leaving the money, can control the situation from the grave for the protection of the person,\u201d she said. \u201cI don\u2019t really see it play out in a way that\u2019s punitive to the kids.\u201d <\/p>\n

Mr. White said when he has encountered a client who\u2019s looking to be highly restrictive with a beneficiary, he won\u2019t share his personal opinion but will explain in detail the likely impact of structuring the inheritance in their preferred way.<\/p>\n

He encourages clients to teach their children core money-management skills including the benefits of delayed gratification and how to live within their means, and then \u201ctrust them to make good decisions.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Open this photo in gallery: BRO Vector\/iStockPhoto \/ Getty Images In his more-than-30-year career, financial adviser Colin White…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":391745,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3093],"tags":[6934,6925,6935,1500,6918,6936,51,943,6917,6930,6931,6927,6919,6916,1700,2266,728,6929,474,6923,6946,6920,6921,1234,6926,388,3611,6607,603,6941,6942,6944,6939,6943,6937,6940,2499,6922,6932,6933,285,3027,6938,6924,53,183,6928,16,15,727,263,6945],"class_list":{"0":"post-391744","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-personal-finance","8":"tag-alberta","9":"tag-arts-news","10":"tag-bc","11":"tag-breaking-news","12":"tag-breaking-news-video","13":"tag-british-columbia","14":"tag-business","15":"tag-canada","16":"tag-canada-news","17":"tag-canada-sports","18":"tag-canada-sports-news","19":"tag-canada-trafficcanada-weather","20":"tag-canadian-breaking-news","21":"tag-canadian-news","22":"tag-economy","23":"tag-education","24":"tag-environment","25":"tag-federal-government","26":"tag-finance","27":"tag-foreign-news","28":"tag-globe-and-mail","29":"tag-globe-and-mail-breaking-news","30":"tag-globe-and-mail-canada-news","31":"tag-government","32":"tag-life-news","33":"tag-lifestyle","34":"tag-local-news","35":"tag-manitoba","36":"tag-national-news","37":"tag-new-brunswick","38":"tag-newfoundland-and-labrador","39":"tag-northwest-territories","40":"tag-nova-scotia","41":"tag-nunavut","42":"tag-ontario","43":"tag-pei","44":"tag-personal-finance","45":"tag-photos","46":"tag-political-news","47":"tag-political-opinion","48":"tag-politics","49":"tag-politics-news","50":"tag-quebec","51":"tag-sports-news","52":"tag-technology","53":"tag-travel","54":"tag-trudeau","55":"tag-uk","56":"tag-united-kingdom","57":"tag-us-news","58":"tag-world-news","59":"tag-yukon"},"share_on_mastodon":{"url":"","error":"Validation failed: Text character limit of 500 exceeded"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/391744","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=391744"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/391744\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/391745"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=391744"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=391744"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.europesays.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=391744"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}